Praying for Your Man

The girls in my youth group are going through a book study again, and one of the first things we were reminded of is the importance of praying for our future husbands.  Now, this was no new concept to me.  I've been doing it for years.  But it's something some girls do struggle with, or don't think of doing, so I will write about my experience.  (And yes, I am still single.  I have not seen my prayers fulfilled, but I know God is in the process of answering.)

For some, praying for a person you don't know is kind of weird.  Yeah.  That was probably the biggest struggle I faced when I started.  How do I pray for someone if I don't even know who he is, or don't know what's going on in his life?  The wonderful thing is, you may not know who you will marry, or what's going on in that man's life, but God does, and He cares about this area of your life.

You may not know the specifics of what is going on his life, but you can still pray.  You can start by praying that He would follow after God whole-heartedly. You can pray that he would be a man of the Word and a man of prayer.  What kind of character qualities do you want to see in him?  Pray that He will grow in those areas.  Do you want him to be part of a ministry or serving in an area of the church?  Pray for that. Pray that he would walk in purity, that he would flee from temptation and youthful lusts, that he would keep his heart, mind and body for you.  Pray that he would cut off sin from in his life and walk in holiness. Pray that God would use him in his single years for His service and glory.

Pray that God would direct his heart to you and have wisdom as to when and how to initiate and lead your relationship.  Pray that God would prepare him to be the spiritual leader and provider for your home, that he would have wisdom in raising your children when God so blesses you.  It's probably also wise to pray that your parents and other counselors in your life would have the wisdom to help you discern God's best for you, and allow yourself to be open to their counsel.  

Now, remember, this isn't all about who you want your husband to be.  Chances are you have lofty dreams of this man and, if you're smart, you're praying about some great and amazing things for him.  I know I do.  But if you want to marry Mr. Awesome, you have to be a woman suitable for him.  So instead of just praying for him, pray that God will prepare you to be the woman, the help meet that he needs.  Keep yourself pure, and conduct yourself in a way that would be pleasing to your husband if he was watching you.  Honour him, even now, with your life.  And keep yourself busy and productive, serving the Lord and others while you wait for God to bring you together.

I have prayed about all these aspects at some time or other, and most on a very regular basis.  I admit though that there are still times when I definitely feel stuck.  What do I pray for?  How do I pray about this man?  Sometimes I feel like I say the same thing over and over.  One of the things I have done at times is ask God how He wants me to pray for my future husband.  I ask God to lead me as I pray.  Something changes in the way I prayed when I do that.  At times, I don't understand why I am asking God for the things I am, but I trust it's His leading.  One day, the purpose of it all will be revealed to me.

It could also be that as you pray for your future husband, or ask God to lead you, that you will start praying in a way you don't necessarily understand.  You may start praying for qualities you otherwise didn't consider.  It may be that God will guide you to pray about someone specifically.  I don't know how God moves in everyone's prayer times.  I don't know what He will do when you seek His direction in this area.  But I encourage you to pray boldly, persistently, and daily about this area of your life.  When you marry the man you're praying for, you will enter into a covenant that is a representation of Christ's relationship with His church.  That's not something to take lightly, and thus, it's something to pray about diligently.

Some who will read this post will certainly be familiar with the song "Faithfully" by Eric and Leslie Ludy.  The idea of waiting faithfully is not a very popular one in our world.  Many may not understand why you're giving up pleasure now for something they don't believe exists, or why you're praying for someone if you don't even know who he is.  Listen to this song.  It may give you an ache in your heart, but I also hope that you will take the words to heart and commit to faithfully waiting and praying for your man.

Reflecting Him Part 2

This post is a continuation of Reflecting Him Part 1.  Just so you know, my weeks aren't always that hard, and I did highlight the hard parts.  I did get some feedback that indicated surprise.

What I began learning at the end of that hard week, and am still in the process of learning is to intercede for people even in the midst of my trials.  To intercede means to plead on another's behalf or to act as a mediator in a dispute.  The word is often used a term for praying for other people.  And although I'm learning the importance of that, I'm also learning to go beyond praying for them.  I'm learning the importance of reaching out to them personally.

You see, I'm not the only one with problems.  I'm not the only who is going through or has gone through pain.  I'm not the only one who hurts, who gets depressed, who faces family challenges, work challenges, who lacks clarity, who struggles spiritually, who gets sick, etc.  I am surrounded by hurting, broken people who can't walk their road alone.  I'm surrounded by people who need a friend to come alongside, to listen, to share their pain.  Even if I don't always know how to help them, sometimes they just need to know somebody else cares, that they're not forgotten.

Think about this.  It is possible that for some reason, you are the only one who sees another's pain.  Perhaps other people notice, but choose to ignore it.  Or perhaps you're the only one a person has had the confidence and trust to share their struggles with.  Perhaps you've just experienced something that allows you to understand what that person is going through.  Don't assume someone else will talk to a hurting person.  This really hit me personally last week when somebody said "You're the only person who asks me."

Sometimes it's hard to make the effort.  It's hard to reach out to others and to listen when I'm bogged down in my own problems.  I'm working through a massive load in my life right now, but there are a few individuals and families that I have had to be intentional about staying connected with.  I've had to be intentional about showing them that I care about them too, and that I'm not just dumping my problems on them, which I can do very easily.

There are days where I feel like I have a right to my "down time".  Some people like to just "veg" and recharge.  Jesus needed down time too.  He needed time away from His work and peoples' demands, but most often, He wasn't just sitting by Himself in a mountain somewhere.  He was spending time with the Father and recharging by His strength.  No, I don't know what He always prayed about, but I think He probably spent a good deal of time interceding for others.  And after that, He went and served them again.

We all get worn out.  We all have hard days and seasons where we just don't know how to keep going.  Tenth Avenue North has a song called "Worn" which has really come to mean a lot to me personally the last couple months.  It echoes how I have felt many days, and I'm sure I'm not the only one.  I encourage you to listen to it, and gather strength, knowing there's hope and this is not the end.  Then look around for someone who needs your prayers and encouragement.

Prayer Journals

It's been a year now since I started keeping a prayer journal. I used to write down prayer notes in my regular journals when I still did that, but never kept a focused prayer journal. I started it when I read Wrestling Prayer by Eric and Leslie Ludy and in the past year, I've filled many pages.

Why keep a prayer journal? That was my question too. I'm not sure what my reason was when I started, but one thing I like it for is to keep my prayer times focused. Very often when I go to prayer, I forget things and my mind and thoughts wander. Having a detailed list of things to pray about keeps me focused. Keeping a prayer journal also allows you to keep track and go back and see how God has answered.

Something I have avoided doing is sticking to a format. My journal entries vary. Some are just list of things to pray about. Some are cries of pain and my need for God's help. Some are just brief accounts of where I'm at spiritually. I don't journal everyday. Some days I have nothing significant to write down and there's times a couple weeks go by without me pulling it out. But I do try to use it regularly and take time to specifically spend in prayer.

In the past year, I've prayed about many things. Friends, family, my future husband, relationships, church, work, missions, ministry, for those hurting or in need and direction in life. I've prayed for a vision, passion and a purpose. I've prayed about different opportunities. I've prayed to show God's love to those around me. I've prayed for provision and health, in which God has answered in many ways. I've prayed about hindrances in my life and sins God has convicted me of.

I've prayed for God to prepare me to be a godly wife and mother, to be a help meet for the man He will one day bring to me, for a better understanding of what marriage is, and to keep myself pure. I pray for Him to guard over my husband and to prepare him to be the godly leader and provider of our home, to be a man of character with a deep love for God and others, a man who will make a difference. At times, I have sought contentment with tears as I wait on Him.

There's even been times where I've just earnestly prayed for a desire for prayer and the Word. It's okay to be honest with God if you don't feel like praying. We can't come to God unless He draws us. Our desire to pray and read His Word comes from Him. Draw nigh to Him, seek Him, and He will draw nearer. Plead for desire if need be. You don't have to be ashamed.

My journal bears record of a lot of joys and tears, ups and downs. It tells of how God has answered. Sometimes it hasn't been in a way I would have expected or even liked, but I have to trust that He knows best.

Try keeping a prayer journal. You don't need anything fancy. A plain spiral bound notebook will do. That's what I use right now. You don't need a formula. Just write what's on your heart. One day you will go back and be amazed at what God has done.

Cultivating Your Prayer Life

So I'm finally here to put up a real post, if you can call it that. My life has been a little bittersweet lately, filled with many joys, but it has also been laced with sorrows and difficulties. But even so, I can say it has certainly been strengthening my prayer life. I'm going to attempt to put some of my recent thoughts into something coherent.

Strengthening your prayer life is one of those things that just isn't easy. But then again a lot of things really worth having aren't easy to get. Sometimes the best things in life require the most fighting and prayer is one of them. It often takes time and a lot of effort; there is no easy formula to a stronger prayer life. I discovered this when I read Eric and Leslie Ludy's book Wrestling Prayer: A Passionate Communion with God. There is no easy 5 step formula. It takes work but it's something worth fighting for.

There are times in life when there are things on my heart that I can't bring to anybody else. There are griefs and burdens that I can't handle on my own and I can only turn to God in prayer. He knows and even when words cannot express what I'm feeling, He's listening. In the past, whenever difficulty would come my way, I would first turn to a friend. In trials, I always wanted to confide in my friends often before I even went before God. Now I don't do that easily anymore, but have rather pleaded with God in prayer and have found Him to be faithful all the time. No matter what happens, I can trust Him and be completely honest with Him.

As I recently read through the Gospels, one of the things I noticed was how Jesus went up to the mountain to pray. It's interesting to see that Jesus Christ, the Son of God, spent so much time in prayer. Often at the end of a long day serving and teaching others, He would go up to the mountain to pray. Why the mountain? Was it simply because there was nowhere else to go? Was that the only place where people would leave Him alone? (If you have any thoughts on this, please share them with me.) Whatever the case was, He spent an incredible amount of time communing with the Father and I have a feeling there were many nights where He got little to no sleep. Even the last night of His life before He was crucified He spent agonizing in prayer.

Another aspect of prayer that I have been learning is boldness. Hebrews 4:16 tells us to "come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need." Philippians 4:6 says "in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God." The scary part though about exercising boldness is that God answers and sometimes I'm not ready when He does.

Prayer is also often difficult because sometimes when God answers it hurts. This is especially true if you pray for God's cleansing in your life. His goal is to make us more like Christ and the purification process can often get very painful.

But overall, I have come to discover that prayer and a passionate communion with God is something worth fighting for. What compels a man to do anything to win the heart of and be with the woman he loves? What compels a man to sell everything he has to purchase one pearl of great price? What compelled Christ to come and suffer and die for mankind? Because in the end, each man knows that the price is more than worth it.

God bless!

Blessed Spring Life

Life during this month has been nothing short of interesting. It has been full of joyful delight and anticipation. However, it has also been accompanied by a cold/cough that doesn't want to go away and concerns about life. It seems to be much in tune with the weather; some days we enjoy radiant, warm sunshine while others bring to us cold winds and rain.

My life could at present be described as an array of loose puzzle pieces, waiting to be fit together into a beautiful masterpiece. (I feel that God does want to make a beautiful masterpiece of my life.) They just seem to be having a difficult time finding each other.

I'm excited about getting some more hours at my job. I'm looking forward to doing some extra stuff on the side, like improving my writing skills and hopefully planting some flowers and a vegetable garden soon. I'm excited about the prospect of being able to get out more, cleaning up the yard, going for walks, taking out my bike and just enjoying new life. Along with all that, a car has also been on my mind a lot lately and I've been looking around at many different possibilities. All in its own good time, I suppose.

As for my bookshelf, I've been able to enjoy some more reading lately. Last week, I read Wrestling Prayer by Eric and Leslie Ludy. If you feel as I do, strengthening your devotional and prayer life can be very difficult. This book is a great help to get motivated and serious about your prayer life. It takes time and work, but in the end I believe I will be able to say it's more than worth it and I will eagerly long for more. If you don't know about Eric and Leslie Ludy, I strongly encourage you to check them out here. I'm really blessed by their books and teaching. If you desire more in your Christian life than you currently have, they can help you grab a hold of it.

I'm also finishing up Life on the Edge: A Young Adult's Guide to a Meaningful Life by Dr. James Dobson. After that comes Alex and Brett Harris' newest book Start Here. I try to balance spiritual growth and fiction to get more variety, so I also started reading The Chronicles of Narnia by C.S. Lewis, which, believe it or not, I have never read before. And if you haven't noticed, I keep a book list on the side here which I regularly add to as I read stuff. If you have questions about anything, please just drop a comment.

I often can't help but wonder what will be next in my life, but I can only take it one day at a time and seek wisdom from God. I have to faithfully do the work I have in front of me and seek to make an impact right where I am.

Often as a young person, I'm filled with dreams of changing the world and making a difference. But you don't have to go to a different country or start some huge movement or anything to do that, although it's wonderful if you can. Sometimes, it's in the little things right where you are. Often just an encouraging word or smile can go a long way. My eyes were opened to this awhile ago when I watched the movie A Greater Yes, which tells the story of Amy Newhouse, also something I recommend. It will challenge you to reach out to those around you and make a difference right where you are. And yes, it's Rebelutionary.

These are just a few of the things on my mind lately. I hope that the things I write will be a blessing and encourage you in your walk with the Lord. Blessings!

So Much to Learn at a Concert

So, I went to see The Glorious Unseen in concert last night. If I had the choice to go again, I probably wouldn't. I like their albums, but the concert was just not my thing. Altogether, it was really, really loud. I think I felt just about every organ in my body vibrating. And although many of the songs had beautiful lyrics, the singer's voice was at times drowned out, and all I was hearing at times was just a bunch of noise. Some people may wonder why I don't like the really hard Christian music, and it's really just that; a whole ton of noise.

Now, I'm by no means "dissing" this group; I like their recorded albums and will continue to listen to them. They have some beautiful, very prayerful songs. But the thing was, I found myself thinking, how is God possibly going to speak and make His presence known through all this noise? However, I prayed that God would allow me to not be judgmental and show me something through it; to truly look past what I saw and heard around me. He didn't speak to me through the music, but through other things and in thinking over things later on in the evening.

Actually, the first thing was really the noise. I didn't think the Spirit could speak through the noise, and although I'm sure He can, I believe there is some truth to that. I was reminded of an account in the Old Testament where God displayed some mighty things to Elijah:

"And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the LORD, And, behold, the LORD passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the LORD; but the LORD was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the LORD was not in the earthquake:
And after the earthquake a fire; but the LORD was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice."
--1 Kings 19:11, 12

When I read this passage, I hear a lot of noise, but God didn't speak in the midst of any of that. He waited until it was calm and quiet. And seeing as He spoke in a still small voice, Elijah wouldn't have heard it anyway. Now, music aside, what kind of "noise" do we have in our lives that may prevent God from speaking? Maybe it is literal noise, maybe you always have music playing, whatever it is you're doing. But what about the other things that fill up and clutter your life, things you constantly have going on, things you're always busy with? These things may not necessarily be bad; they may actually be very good. But could it be that you're surrounding yourself with so much "noise" that God is unable to speak, or that you are unable to hear Him when He does?

The other thing that stuck out to me was the Gospel message shared at the concert. At first, I kind of groaned within myself for several reasons: the man used a different Bible translation I wasn't familiar with and wasn't sure I liked, I wasn't crazy about the way he started off, and it was based on the parable of the prodigal son, which I was all too familiar with and hear the passage spoken on all too often, or so I thought. But I learned something very unexpected: it's great to hear the same thing again from a total new perspective. He brought out new points and insights that were totally new to me, things that I had never thought of or heard anybody speak on before. It gave me a new appreciation for the passage and for the insight of other teachers.

Last, was not really something I learned, but rather something I was amazed and challenged by. During the concert, The Glorious Unseen sang the song How He Loves Us, which was not written by this group. It was not my favourite song, but has an amazing story behind it, which you can hear from the writer personally here if you want, but I'll share the gist of it as well, as well as my thoughts. The morning before the person wrote this song a few years ago, his best friend who was a youth leader was in a prayer meeting. And he prayed that if God would shake the youth of the nation, he would give up his life. He said he would die today if it meant that God would shake the youth of the nation. He died that night in a car accident. The writer of this song trusted that if God heard the first part of the prayer, he would follow through with the second. And although this man, who became a youth leader himself, saw many wonderful things, he didn't see a movement happen. This song that he wrote the morning after his friend's death, actually did end up changing the lives of many teens.

I believe this song is only a small part of that man's prayer. I mean, here was a man who not only prayed for change, but laid His life before God, ready to die, if it only meant that God would bring change. It's amazing for me to think of the possibility of our generation turning their lives over to the Lord and living lives surrendered to Him is because of a man's prayer and sacrifice. I also believe that the Rebelution is one such movement that is an answer to this man's prayer and death. I believe that God is working and He will fulfill that man's request. His death shall not be in vain. How will you respond? Will you surrender up your life to God, living it fully for Him, laying aside all the cares and things this world has to offer, and follow Jesus no matter what the cost?

To close, I apologize for my lack of blogging this year. It has been a busy one, but it's also been a good one, in which I have seen many amazing things. I'm done school now, and with having some more free time on my hands, I hope to post more consistently, if anybody's still paying attention. Blessings!

Feet Upon a Rock

Okay, this is humbling to say after my cheery post on Tuesday, but I had a really hard day yesterday. And it didn't help that there are so many things I can't understand, including myself. The Lord's chastisement really hurts, but it's all the proof I need that He loves me. In the evening, during my prayer time, I felt a calm come over me, much different than some of the frustrations of my day. I almost couldn't understand it. Then I remembered a few lines from a hymn:

In seasons of distress and grief,
My soul has often found relief,
And oft escape the tempter's snare,
By thy return, sweet hour of prayer.
--Sweet Hour of Prayer, William W. Walford, 1842

How often do we really flee to that safe retreat before our Father's throne? I, sooner seem to struggle along out of my own strength, wondering why I can't get anything right. That's because, in my own strength, I can't get anything right. In me dwells no good thing, but in Christ, I can be made perfect. I must empty myself and call on the Lord to be filled.

I am also thankful for God's mercy and forgiveness. As Jeremiah 31:34 says "...I will forgive their iniquity, and I will remember their sin no more." "He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings." (Psalm 40:2)

"By trying to grab fulfillment everywhere, we find it nowhere."
--Elisabeth Elliot, Passion and Purity

It's Time to Pray

I must start by saying that I had a really good weekend and that God really blessed me. I had lots of time alone to spend time in His Word, in prayer, and I had time to start on the stack of books I all want to read.

Saturday morning, in my dosing state, I had a really strange dream. I won't share many of the details just because it involves other people, but I would like to share what God showed me, or rather, is showing me through it. In my dream, I received some news about a few individuals that really shocked me. I didn't think about it as I woke up but I remembered it when I sat down for breakfast all alone. First of all, I found it really strange to have a dream like this now. There was a time where I spent a lot of time in prayer for these individuals but I haven't seen either of them in a long time. Then I thought, well, maybe I should pray for them. But I hadn't seen these people in so long, I hardly felt like I had any responsibility to pray for them. How could I effectively pray for someone I haven't seen in so long? But I did have a rough idea where they are in their lives right now, and that alone told me that they could probably use a lot of prayer. And then it was like God was saying, "Margaret, it's time to pray again."

I was later reminded of the story Francois Carr shared at our church twice now, how one night the Spirit laid it on his heart to pray for a lady. He didn't know why he was supposed to pray for her but he was obedient to the Spirit's prompting. I may never know why God wants me to pray and that's okay, I just have to be obedient. I mean, have you ever had a perfect week? What if these people are going through some fires right now?

Our prayers do go farther than the ceiling. We were reminded about this just this weekend. Last Saturday at our prayer meeting, we prayed for Cuba as hurricane Gustav was sweeping through there at that very time. It had just come through Haiti where a large number of people lost their lives, but when it came through Cuba, not a single person lost their life as a result. Prayer really does something.

It's time to pray!

Rejoice!

Yes, it's been a week again since I last posted. Where to start? Last week, God was really pruning, chastising, and refining. I'm learning to rejoice in the Lord, even when my circumstances aren't all that great and just learning what it really means to know God. Not just knowing about God or who He is but really know God. I had the chance to listen to Love With Shoes On and God's really been asking me "Have you counted the cost?" We had Otto Koning at our church this weekend and I was reminded once again that yes, there is a cost to consider. Along the same lines, He's also asking me "Are you willing? If I ask you to do this, will you be obedient?" It's been a time of learning, reflecting, growing, and loving God more. He's just always becoming more real in so many ways; it's amazing!

Something came up today that I really need to seek God's will and direction in. So if God lays it on your heart to pray for me, it would be sincerely appreciated.

Blessings!

Humility and Obedience

So, you've all probably been wondering where I've been, but in all fairness I did warn you. I can't begin to explain what God has been doing in my life but He's definitely teaching me the power in a spirit of meekness and humility. I've made an utter fool out of myself on several occasions but that's alright. I'm also learning to walk in obedience to the Spirit's leading. I had the opportunity to witness to a few people yesterday when our youth was at the park which was interesting. It's really hard for me to just go up to a random person and share the Gospel with them but God gives the strength.

I have a Driver Ed exam today so any prayers would be more than greatly appreciated. And because I have to study, that's about all I'm going to say right now. God bless!

I Need Your Help

I'll be honest...I'm going through a really hard time right now and I can't do it alone. I need the prayers of other believers. Just when I thought I couldn't get any busier God throws a book in there. Yes, that's what I've been hinting at the last few posts. It seems that God wants me to write a novel; he wants to accomplish the impossible in me. I cannot do it, but He can do it through me. Along with that, I'm going through a lot of inner struggles that I really don't know how to deal with. I'm slowly seeing that it all ultimately boils down to my own pride and selfishness. Pray that it may be crushed and replaced with a spirit of humility, meekness, and love. Pray that I may lean on Jesus and know I can't do it on my own. Pray that if God wants me to write this book, that He would provide the time and would show me what to write and reveal Himself to me. I'm really learning to do hard things; getting out of my comfort zone, pursuing excellence rather than excuses, doing things that don't immediately pay off...

"Great faith is the product of great fights. Great testimonies are the outcome of great tests. Great triumphs can only come out of great trials."
-Smith Wigglesworth

I trust that God wants to show Himself strong through my weaknesses and that this will be a time of growing. So, I have to go because I do have a lot of work to do.

God be with you.

What Do You Think?

I had shared something a few months back about my next hard thing. I started it but when I got busier, I dropped it. This week someone came to me who felt that I was stopping myself from doing hard things and therefore wasn't being true to myself and to God's will. He also felt that it was really needed and many could benefit from it. I thought about it and realized that I was limiting what God was able to do through me. The only problem is, to me it's seemingly impossible right now. Maybe in a few years when I'm done school and have more time, yes, but not now. Then again, I knew God had a surprise waiting for me. I think it was just last week I was telling somebody that nothing was too hard and wadda ya know, here am I saying it's impossible. I really need to start to "practice what I preach." Now, I've been praying about it and it's looking like He wants me to do this. I hardly know what to do...

Question: Is there a difference between working around obstacles and forcing open a closed door? I have many opportunities come up but the way isn't clear and I wonder if it's really worth the trouble to make it work out. So I give up pretty quick and conclude that it must not be God's will. So can you work out things that are in the way without forcing open a door?

I want to be obedient to God's will but I'm really not sure how everything's gonna work out right now. Anyway I have lots of things to do but I'm hoping to be back early next week. Blessings!

Quick Update

Well, let's see what's new. Saturday the youth at our church went tubing. Yesterday, after our morning service, us girls had a potluck lunch and some good talks and discussion afterward. In the evening we had a service focused on missions which was really good.

This past week, as good it had been has been very difficult. I've been starting to see so much of my own wickedness and God has just been showing me fault after fault and I feel like screaming "One thing at a time!" I'm trying hard to learn to love, speak words of encouragement that lift up and not tear down, and lots about purity. I'm learning that there is so much more to purity in words, actions, thoughts and all those little things that say so much that we need to be really careful about like our eye language. This week I'm planning on listening to the Godly Courtship series by Denny Kenaston cause there's so much I need to learn and pull together. As hard as much of this pruning is, I know it's good for me and will result in a lot of growing.

So there's a bit about what's going on in my life and if the Spirit leads you I would appreciate everyones prayers as I'm going through this chapter in my life. Blessings!

Requesting Prayer

Psalm 40:1-4
I waited patiently for the LORD; and he inclined unto me, and heard my cry.
He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.
And he hath put a new song in my mouth, even praise unto our God: many shall see it, and fear, and shall trust in the LORD.
Blessed is that man that maketh the LORD his trust, and respecteth not the proud, nor such as tun aside to lies.

This really was my song this morning and I had no idea that God would have such an encouragement in store for me when I got up this morning for my quiet time. I guess I'd have to honestly say that I'm currently recuperating from an emotional inner conflict. Although I'm doing much better today (sorry to those girls who I gave a real fright last night), I still do need lots of prayer. I need the Lord's direction and guidance in a particular area of my life right now and I need to accept His answer and say "Yes, Lord." Last week, I felt myself moving away from God because of my refusal to surrender to His will. I know that whatever He asks me to do, that no matter how hard it is, it's what's best. Pray that I would continually wait upon the Lord and be obedient to that still, small voice. I also need to learn to be honest with others and not wear a mask as if everything is always A OK.

Psalm 40:8
I delight to do thy will, O my God: yea, thy law is within my heart.

Quick Update

Hey everyone! It's been a busy non-stop week, but I have progressed well with my schoolwork. Praise God! God is bringing about many changes and challenges in my life and I have a feeling that the next few weeks aren't going to be so easy. Please pray for me that I would rest in Jesus, be obedient to Him, and take each and every challenge up as a learning opportunity. That I may remain strong and be thankful for whatever comes my way.

A Shocking Realization

I just came to a shocking realization. As the winds of change are turning once again in my life, I started to dread what I see coming and felt like I wasn't ready for it at all and then it dawned on me why. I remembered part of a message that says (not exact words): "You ask, 'What will it cost me for God to break my heart?' I'll tell you what it will cost you; it will cost you absolutely everything." Then he goes on to say that when God breaks your heart, you begin to see people the way that God sees them. And that is exactly what I'm afraid of. I'm afraid that I'll start to see people the way that God sees them and that it will cause me grief, sorrow, and pain. then I realized that this is what Jesus went through. By going through this, in a sense I would be becoming more like Jesus. Is that what I'm scared of? I don't have the slightest idea what it means to follow Jesus or who God is.

I ask you to pray that God really would break my heart and that I wouldn't let any bitterness into my heart, but rather a spirit of love and compassion. Pray that I would be yielded and allow God to fulfill what he wishes in my life.

And do you know what the strangest thing is? It almost feels like this is the result of someone else praying for me.

1 John 3:21,22
Beloved, if our heart condemn us not, then have we confidence toward God.
And whatsoever we ask, we receive of him, because we keep his commandments, and do those things that are pleasing in his sight.

Time For Another Post

Wow, this week has just flown by. It just feels like yesterday that I last posted but I figured it was probably a good idea to drop by. When I'm not babysitting or when Brendan's sleeping, I try to get in every minute of schoolwork that I can. So there's my excuse ahead of time if you don't hear from me for awhile. Pray that I would have a positive attitude towards this, even though it isn't always fun and that I would continue to work diligently. Also that I would never cut my quiet time short because of what I all have to do in a day. It reminds me of a poem that I read awhile back:

Time To Pray

I got up early one morning
and rushed right into the day;
I had so much to accomplish
that I didn't have time to pray.

Problems just tumbled about me
and heavier came each task;
"Why doesn't God help me?" I wondered
He said, "But you didn't ask."

I wanted to see joy and beauty
but the day toiled on, gray and bleak;
I wondered why God didn't show me.
He said,"But you didn't seek"

I tried to come into God's presence;
I used all the keys at the lock.
God Gently and lovingly chided
"My child, you didn't knock."

I woke up early this morning
And paused before entering the day.
I had so mush to accomplish
That I had to take time to Pray.

Author Unknown

May our every day start with God, no matter how much we have to do.

Hey!

I'm sorry I haven't gotten many solid posts in lately. I've been busy with a very full schedule. I have been learning so much and at the same seeing that I know absolutely nothing. I've been seeing how I need to be still and know that he is God and that by waiting on him, I'll renew my strength. I would just like to ask for everyone's prayers. I'm going through something right now that will no doubt change my life forever. I need wisdom, understanding, and to know that even if I don't understand, God knows what he's doing. He will strengthen me, help me, and uphold me.

I offer my thanks in advance and God bless you all.

Snow, And More Snow

So I woke up this morning to that lovely pinging sound of ice pellets on my window. After a thick layer of ice, several inches of snow. Since you couldn't exactly tell where the road was, we decided it was probably a good idea to stay home from church, which may I say, felt a little awkward, but I finished studying for my exam on Wednesday, which was a great relief.

This morning, I was reading in Ephesians and there I came across a passage that I think we can all apply to our daily lives.

Ephesians 6:5-8
Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling in singleness of heart, as unto Christ,
Not with eyeservice as menpleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart.
With good will doing service, as to the Lord, and not to men:
Knowing that whatsoever good thing any man doeth, the same shall receive of the Lord, whether he be bond or free.

How often when we have a job to do, or are doing our chores when no one else is around, it's so easy to quickly skim over it. No, Mom might not find out, but God still knows and it's from Him that we will receive our reward. Think about this the coming week and go the "extra mile." If you're asked to do something, do it thoroughly and more. If you aren't asked to do something, but see that it needs to be done, do it. Take on someone else's chores out of love for them or just simply to bless them so that they have one less thing on their "to do" list.

GUESS WHAT, GUESS WHAT, GUESS WHAT?!!!
My birthday is in two weeks! Okay, so that was really random.

I would just ask for everyone's prayers. I'm going through something right now that I'm not quite sure how to handle. Whatever it may be, I want God's will to be done. It may be very hard, but I know that it will be best, even if I don't see it now.

God bless you and keep you.

"Now unto him who is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us,
Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen." (Eph. 3:20,21)

Trials

Romans 5:3-5
And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also knowing that tribulation worketh patience;
And patience, experience; and experience, hope:
And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.

These verses were a great encouragement to me today. Our family is going through a really hard time right now and it is very hard to see the light. I ask you if you would pray for us continually.