Last night, I came home tired, but not too tired. I was more than ready to shower, settle down in my pajamas under my blankets with a hot cup of rooibos tea and focus on God. These last few days have been hard and wonderful at the same time. I'm learning to let go and be broken. Some of you may know what that feels like.
I was reading yesterday in Ezekiel and a little part of a verse stuck out to me. It wasn't particularly in the context it was in, but it still spoke to me nonetheless: Behold, when it was whole, it was meet for no work. So from this, I know that until I am cut down and broken, I am of no use. I think also of the seed. Unless it falls into the ground and dies, it abideth alone. But once it dies, then it begins to grow.
Matthew 13: 45, 46
Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto a merchant man, seeking goodly pearls:
Who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had, and bought it.
Jesus is that pearl of great price. He costs us everything, but He is more than worth the price. I want my life to reflect these verses. I want to like Mary, choose that good part, which will not be taken away from me. (See Luke 10: 41,42) People can take so much away from us: our house, car, possessions, jobs, family, friends, food, clothing, but they cannot take Jesus away from us. While we only have things here for a time, we always have Jesus.
Like Jim Elliot, I want to give up what I cannot keep to gain that which I cannot lose. Why would I hold on to something now, when I can see that one day, it will be taken away from me, with much pain. Why not just let go now, and gain so much more.
I find myself repeating the words of the song Cry for Humility by Christ our Life:
I will worship in Spirit and in Truth
Teach me discipline, to meditate on You
You gave up Your life, I must give my all to You
Remove the veil so I can see
God bless you all and have a wonderful week.