Desiring Something Greater

You Can't Quit!

2012-01-19T21:33:00.000-05:00

I'm stopping in to say good-bye to my readers for a short time. I'll be traveling to Europe in a few days, so my blog may suffer neglect for a couple weeks again. But first I'll let you know what's been going on in my life recently.

I'm doing hard things. It seems almost like I haven't been a rebelutionary until this year, now that I'm no longer a teen. The last few weeks have stretched me to what I think is the max, and the road won't be getting easier any time soon. I'm going through a big life change at the time, and there have been a number of other things also coming up to make it more difficult.

But even in this time, I have been learning. Here's a brief list of some of the things that learned in the last few weeks. As the Lord gives me grace to keep moving forward, perhaps I may expound on them in the future.

Winners don't quit. Quitters don't win.
Sometimes the most effective sermon/motivational talk in your life is the one God gives you and you preach to yourself.
Giving up may seem easier now, but it will only lower your confidence and make it harder next time.
God's promises don't expire.
In order to encourage/inspire others, you must be an overcomer and face the challenges in your life. You must be willing to fight.
God's grace is sufficient for each day. In hard times, He gives just enough strength for the next small step.

This road ahead of me right now is not easy and to be honest, I'm afraid. But at the moment, my only reasonable option seems to be to trust God and persevere. Even in difficulty, I can say He has been faithful thus far and He promises to lead me the rest of the way.

The first words of the following song describe how I feel at this point. But I know I'm not alone. My desire for this time is that it would bring me closer to God, that I would run to and hide in Him, and encourage others to strive after greater things.

The Final Summit by Andy Andrews

2012-01-14T15:52:00.000-05:00

In The Final Summit, a sequel to The Traveler's Gift, traveler David Ponder has become a successful man by implementing the Seven Decisions that Determine Personal Success. Now he has been chosen by the archangel Gabriel to be the leader of a summit to prevent the final destruction of the world. Together, the travelers must determine what humanity needs to do in order "to restore itself to the path toward successful civilization."

The Final Summit provided a lot of information about historical figures, both well-known and little-known. The character of Winston Churchill often lightened the tense mood with his humourous personality. The conclusion the characters came to was simple, but if applied, the ending principle could perhaps have a significant effect on the reader's life.

This story had some good insights, but they weren't profound. I didn't glean as much from it as I did from The Traveler's Gift. I felt the pacing was slow at times and the author took a long time to get to the point of the story, which he could have expanded on a little more. I had to push myself at times to get to the end. The story was good, but it wasn't life-changing for me personally. Overall, I was a little disappointed. The Traveler's Gift should be read first, and was in my opinion a better read.

I was provided with a complimentary copy of this book through Booksneeze. I was not required to write a positive review and the opinions expressed are my own.

Looking for Vision?

2012-01-12T12:24:00.000-05:00

I recently happened upon an article by John C. Maxwell on vision. Please read it to understand what I'm about to say. I wasn't sure about everything he said, but much of this article I understood from experience. Maxwell begins his article with a few very important questions. "Where does vision come from? How does a leader develop a clear vision for the future?"

It seems to me that Maxwell puts vision and leadership together, and the more I think about, the two go hand in hand. Leaders have vision. In order to be a leader, you have to have a vision. Who will want to look to you if you don't? When I look at my generation, this is something that is greatly lacking, and the church is no exception. Youth are wandering around with no clear direction, no vision for the future and are content to settle for the mediocre. It often grieves me to watch their lives.

I understand what Maxwell writes about feeling your way through the dark. That's the hard part. The thing about vision is, it's not clear in the beginning. For a long time, I have believed that God has something much greater in mind for my life, but I couldn't see what it was. I still can't, but I do believe he is beginning to shed some light on it and show me what He wants from me. He does that you know.

Isaiah 42:16
"And I will lead the blind in a way that they do not know,
in paths that they have not known I will guide them.
I will turn the darkness before them into light,
the rough places into level ground.
These are the things I do,
and I do not forsake them."

God doesn't always give us the full picture right away. Sometimes He sheds just enough light for the next step. I'm experiencing this in my life right now, and it's scary. I don't know where this path in front of me will go, and I don't always know if I can handle what's ahead, but he gives the grace to get through one day at a time.

Maxwell believes that passion is the beginning of vision. I had to think about this, but I think I agree. It reminded me immediately of an article I wrote a few months back called "What Do I Do Now?". I have concluded that a part of the reason so many single young women are discontent is because they don't have any meaningful task they love to pour themselves into. Until they have a love for something, a work that they can pour themself into, something they truly care about, they likely won't have vision.

I really liked how Maxwell said "Desire alone is surely not sufficient to develop a vision." This is so, so true. He explains that our knowledge and abilities must be complemented by passion in order to make a difference. And passion, a desire alone for something, won't get you very far if you don't have the necessary knowledge or skills.

A verse that has meant a lot to me recently is Proverbs 19:2: "Desire without knowledge is not good, and whoever makes haste with his feet misses his way." (ESV) I read this when I first began to learn about vision and it's place in my life. It showed me that I needed to develop certain knowledge and skills if I wanted my dreams to fly. But ultimately, passion is what will drive your vision and make it a reality.

A lot of people wander through life because they don't know what they truly want and they don't have anything that drives them. It won't always be clear at first and sometimes you'll have to feel through the dark, but until you have discovered those things, you will not have vision. So find out what it is.

Alien Love by Kevin Abell

2012-01-06T11:35:00.000-05:00

Kevin Abell is releasing his new book Alien Love this month! Having already had the privilege of reading it, I'm here to share my review with you. First of all, Kevin is a friend, so perhaps my review could be considered biased, but I am being honest here. He wouldn't have wanted anything else. I might also add though that the author was to me a writer first; it's only because he published his first book that I ever got to know him.

I might as well begin by saying that I was afraid to read Alien Love. Don't get me wrong. I wanted to read it, but I was afraid of what it would do to me. Love isn't always my favourite subject of discussion. It's the area in which I lack the most as a Christian. I often avoid messages specifically on love because they never make me feel good about myself. I also don't like it when other Christians make love sound easy. Kevin doesn't. In short, I likely wouldn't have read this book if Kevin hadn't written it.

To describe what this book is about in one line, I think I would have to say this: it's an overview of what love is and how it's demonstrated, a hard look at our sinful nature, and an explanation of the Gospel and the Christian life. Kevin explains what love is and examines the attributes of love as described in 1 Corinthians 13. He describes the seriousness of sin, how it's all equal, how we're all equally guilty and can only compare ourselves to God's holy standard. He then goes on to lay down a clear explanation of the Gospel and the Christian life in a way that anyone can understand.

There were numerous things I particularly enjoyed about Kevin's book, of which I will share a few. First of all, it's simple; he doesn't get complicated or stuff his writing full of deep theology. He starts his chapters off with stories, often from his own life which kept me engaged throughout the book and often amused. He illustrated the attributes of love in a way that gave me a fresh perspective. He explained that if we really understand God's creation and love for mankind, it will dramatically change the way we treat those around us. Kevin also isn't afraid to speak truth, talk about sin for what it is, nor does he shy away from often messy topics. This is much needed in our time. Throughout the book, he keeps coming back to the Gospel and effectively points his readers toward Christ.

Having said all that, reading Alien Love will NOT make you feel good about yourself if you read it with an honest, open heart. It made me quite uncomfortable at times and I didn't always like everything he had to say. But it was truth straight from God's Word, and it didn't change just because my flesh didn't like it. Reading this book made me see once again how miserably I fall short. It exposed my sin, my lack of concern for the lost, and showed me how much still needs to change in my life. If this book doesn't leave you examining your life, I'd have to say you missed the whole point.

Has this book changed my life? Not yet. But I do believe that if I apply the principles in this book to my life, it will change me. I have no doubt about that. As a reader, I must move past the intellectual understanding and actually live it. It's not easily done, but I know it will be worth it.

Kevin has a sincere desire for people to come to Christ and it reflects in Alien Love. He doesn't write like someone who has it altogether, but is real and honest. Although I haven't read The Edge of His Cloak in two years, I'd have to say his writing has improved much since then. Alien Love is a book I would highly recommend to all my readers.

Kevin writes an excellent blog at Blue Collar Christianity, which you can check out as well. He is also having a book launch later this month. For readers that live in the area who would like to hear Kevin speak and get your copy of Alien Love (available in paperback and hardcover), it will be held at the Aylmer Old Town Hall on January 28 at 6:30pm. Please come out and show your support.

When You Feel Unworthy

2012-01-02T16:49:00.002-05:00

"Have you ever felt God calling you to serve in a certain area, but thought you weren’t worthy? As I’ve been seeking the Lord’s direction at this point in my life, I’ve been battling with many doubts, questions and feelings of inadequacy. I believe that God has given me a message to share with others, but I often wonder if I can."

Read the rest of my article in January's issue of Lighted Lamp.

Looking Forward to 2012

2011-12-30T22:29:00.000-05:00

Another year has come and gone and now I'm here to reflect on the end of my teenage years. This past year has been significant for me in many ways and was filled with both joy and sorrow. I started the year in a state of discontentment, watched dreams fall to the ground, and came to terms with the idea that God wanted me where I was, even when it meant sacrifice. I asked a lot of life question, some for which I received answers, or at least some insight. I watched friends go through the unspeakable pain of losing a child. I had new opportunities like going to Boston (my first trip on my own), I learned to understand what I have to offer, and I've walked alongside some amazing people who have been both mentors and friends.

Earlier this year, I was informed that I wasn't going to be where I was next year. The business I worked for the past almost three years closed this week and for a long time I couldn't see past this year. I knew I would be free to move on and do something else, but I didn't have a clue what that would be. There were things I knew I wanted to pursue, like studying literature and writing. I explored post-secondary education and prayed through other options, but it continually became clear they were not God's plan for me at the time.

Every New Year in my church, we pick up a promise verse and come back the following year to share how that verse worked itself out in our life that year. My verse for the year was Philippians 4:19: "But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus." When I picked that up at the end of 2010, I thought I knew what it would mean for my life. I was wrong though. Before long, my income was cut while my expenses increased, but I always had enough. Then it became evident that I would reach the end of the year unemployed. Ironic, eh? But God holds to His promises and I'm not unemployed. I have a new position in a new field that I'm not qualified for, but I will gain new experience and have opportunities beyond anything I could have dreamed. God's goodness never ends!

This week also marks the end of my teenage years. It's kind of hard to believe that it's over and I've spent some time reflecting over the happenings in the last several years of my life. Do I have regrets? Yes and no. I didn't live a "normal" teenage life in terms of education, work and life in general. I followed a unique path and that I do not regret. But I do regret not having lived more fully for the Lord, not having pursued holiness in my life more passionately and not having fought more against sin. There are definitely many things I would erase if I could.

If I was asked to give my readers one piece of counsel from my teen years, it would be this. Keep a pure mind. Yes, it's extremely hard and I learned that with great difficulty this past year. I had originally expounded a lot on this, but it didn't fit, so let me just say this. Sin begins in the mind, and we eventually act on what we think on. By keeping a pure mind, we will save ourselves, those around us, and our future spouse a lot of pain. Be careful what you dwell on.

When I look back on this year, it was good, but it could have been better. I want to aim to make each year better, to grow more, love more and to follow Christ more faithfully. I can say though that overall I am much happier now than I have been in the past. Yes, a few chapters have closed in my life but I'm looking forward to new things and I'm excited for what 2012 holds for me. I would like to wish all my readers a very blessed New Year!

Lies Young Women Believe

2011-12-14T10:37:00.001-05:00

A couple months ago, the girls in my youth group started going through the Lies Young Women Believe: And the Truth That Sets Them Free study by Nancy Leigh DeMoss and Dannah Gresh. In all honesty, before we started, I didn't think I needed it. As it turns out, I didn't realize how badly I did need it.

Lies Young Women Believe examines the 25 most common lies Christian young women believe about God, Satan, themselves, relationships, guys, media, sin and their futures and reveals God's Truth about them. There's a Companion Guide that goes along with the book, which I would definitely recommend using. It splits the book into a nine week study and there are study questions and exercises that correspond with what you're reading that week. They also make good use of colour and graphics so it's visually appealing. Sure, you may wonder why you need to spend the money on two books (so did I), but it is well worth it.

When I started this study, I knew there were many areas of my life that needed to change, and as much as I wanted the change, I was afraid of the pain that would come with it. This book doesn't just expose lies we believe; it exposes sin. It doesn't beat around the bush. It looks at gritty issues for what they really are. There were many issues that came up in this study where God was already convicting me. There were things that He was repeatedly teaching me and were coming up in so many different places, that I just couldn't run from them. I had to face head-on lies I was believing about sin, purity, authority and media and deal with them.

One of the blessings that came out of this study was simply spending more time in the Word aside from just my morning devotions. This study wasn't about the book, it was about the Book, and it sent you searching through the scriptures all the time. It also emphasized memorizing scripture, something I always want to do, but have a hard time sticking with. A verse came to me last week, that wasn't mentioned in the study, but I feel it kind of sums it up.

Psalm 119:11 (ESV)
I have stored up your word in my heart,
that I might not sin against you.

I would definitely recommend this book to young women. If you're around the age of 20+, don't look at it and think you're too old for it, especially if you're still single. (I kind of did that.) The issues discussed in the book do still apply to you. If you're married, you can always look to Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

For more mature young women, I would also recommend And the Bride Wore White: Seven Secrets to Sexual Purity by Dannah Gresh, which I read a few years ago. Earlier this year, she also published What Are You Waiting For?: The One Thing No One Ever Tells You About Sex. I haven't read it in it's entirety, but I have skimmed portions and would recommend it as well to more mature readers. (She speaks frankly about sexual issues.)

As young women, we are called to be examples to the world. If you want to grow in your relationship with God and be filled with His Truth, this study is a great place to start.

Young Man on Sexual Healing

2011-12-06T08:54:00.001-05:00

This young man puts a very important issue into a poem, sharing God's Truth and forgiveness. He examines the problem of sexual sin, the hurt countless young women face, and the forgiveness Christ offers And no, it's not just for the guys; girls can learn from this as well. There are many good reasons to wait for God's timing.

You Want Transparency?

2011-12-03T10:28:00.000-05:00

In response to my post yesterday, I was told that transparency trumps significance. Okay, I can believe that....but only sometimes. For me, transparency begs the following question: Do we as Christians really want people to be transparent with us? And how do we respond when they are?

I'm not always transparent with people. (That's an honest, transparent statement.) I have several reasons for that. The lighter ones include that I don't think people really want me to be, that they don't really want to hear what's going on in my life, or they don't care. Other times, I just don't want to talk about it. Deeper down, I'm not transparent because I'm afraid of being judged, I'm afraid of what people think, I'm afraid of rejection. Sometimes, I even fail to be transparent with those closest to me, not for fear that they won't love me, but for fear of hurting or disappointing them.

To be honest, I don't always respond well when people are transparent with me. Some Christians have no problem being open about where they're at, and it's not always in a pretty place. I'm not sure how to deal with people when they have an ongoing struggle with the same thing and can't get over it. Sometimes, I have damaged relationships, because I couldn't accept a friend's transparency and hurt them instead. In short, I don't always want to see transparency in others. Sometimes, I'd much rather believe the mask they put on to hide what I'd rather not see.

When people are transparent with us, how do we respond? Rather, how should we respond? What do we say when they confess the gross, ugly sin they've been hiding for years? For starters, if we expect transparency, we have to put on love and cut the judgement. That doesn't mean we have to be okay with everything. Love is not okay with sin, but it doesn't join the ranks of the haters either. Author Kevin Abell has excellent insight on what love really looks like and I hope to share that with you in the future.

For me, I have been able to be transparent with a few people about sin in my life and receive love. No, they didn't tell me I was okay. Quite the opposite. But I never felt judged by them. They asked me straight questions that demanded honest answers. And that's what I needed at the time. I needed accountability, as unpleasant as it sometimes was. Those were the real friends.

You might be among the number who can't stand fakers and people acting like they have it altogether when their life is really a mess. Or maybe you've been there. I have. But before you ask people for transparency, ask yourself whether or not you want it. And ask yourself how you will respond. Chances are, the people in your life don't want to be transparent for the same reasons you don't.

How Can I Give....?

2011-12-02T10:29:00.000-05:00

I've been searching my brain all week for something to write about, but I feel like I'm coming up empty. It's not necessarily that I don't have ideas, but they all seem incomplete, it's not the right time, or I'm not sure how to make them work. I've been mulling over my year end post, like I have down for the past few years, but I have to wait a few weeks to share it. With other ideas, I just don't know how to bring across what I'm want.

If this blog is ever a disappointment to you, I'm sorry. I really am. But I don't want to put out pointless content for the sake of there being something new here for you. There's enough writers with nothing to say and I don't want to add to the number. I truly want to offer insight here that would uplift and inspire people, and if I'm not doing that, I don't want to be writing.

I started on a new journey of sorts a couple months ago. Before this point, I often felt like I didn't have anything to offer, like I had nothing to give, like I didn't make a difference. It took me walking through a process with a mentor of sorts to see that I did have a difference to make. But there was still a question pressing on my heart that I had to put before him: "How can I give what I don't have?" Yes, I recognized I had a difference to make (I do even more now), but I felt like it wasn't real in my own life. How could I inspire other people to have vision, when my life was directionless, when I wasn't even sure I had one?

He helped me get past that, and many other things and I can't begin to describe in a few words how exciting this journey has been for me. But it doesn't fix things. Yes, God has blessed me with wonderful people to help guide me in a very uncertain time in my life, but there's still a lot to work through. I honestly can't see past this year. I have most of this next month here planned out, but as soon as 2012 hits, I am almost clueless as to what I will have ahead of me. I know I want to reach people through my writing, but sometimes, I just don't know how to do it. I don't know what to share with readers.

About a week ago, I told a friend something like "God won't expect you give what you don't have. He will fill you." Today I have to remind myself of that. I have been seeking God in many things recently, and my writing is one of them. I believe He has shown me in part what He has in mind for me in this area, and it's much bigger than my own ideas. But then I feel empty. I hit a phase of writer's block, and it doesn't seem possible. I look at my life, and it seems like something that will never fly. Ever.

As I was thinking about this, I was reminded of a lesson by a former Sunday school teacher. He had an interactive way of teaching that made you remember his lessons years later. Even in my youth group, we still talk about the things we remember from years back, things like "start righteousnessing." I could provide a whole list of things I remember. I don't remember the exact topic of this lesson, but I remember the key verse he used.

Psalm 81:10 (ESV)
I am the Lord your God,
who brought you up out of the land of Egypt.
Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it.

I remember this verse because he used a picture to illustrate it, like he often did. It was a picture of a nest full of baby birds, with their beaks wide open, waiting to be filled. If we open up our mouth wide, God will fill it. If I continue to seek God, and take time to listen to His voice, He will fill me. He does not expect us to go on empty. Although this teacher no longer stands and speaks to us on Sunday mornings, his words, his message still rings loud in our lives in many ways. His impact is not forgotten.

No, I don't know what my life holds. I don't know how far my words will reach. I don't always know what my words will be. But if I ask God, He will fill me. I don't have to give what I don't have. If I don't always turn out something significant here every week, be patient with me. As the Lord leads, it will come.

Aristotle on Virtue

2011-11-23T18:48:00.000-05:00

I've been studying a portion of Aristotle's Nicomachean Ethics in The Great Books Reader. The selection mainly focuses on virtue, and its meaning. Here's a portion that stuck out to me.

"Both fear and confidence and appetite and anger and pity and in general pleasure and pain may be felt both too much and too little, and in both cases not well; but to feel them at the right times, with reference to the right objects, towards the right people, with the right motive, and in the right way, is what is both intermediate and best, and this is characteristic of virtue. Similarly with regard to actions also there is excess, defect, and the intermediate. Now virtue is concerned with passions and actions, in which excess is a form of failure, and so is defect, while the intermediate is praised and is a form of success; and being praised and being successful are both characteristics of virtue. Therefore virtue is a kind of mean, since, as we have seen, it aims at what is intermediate."

He goes on to say this a little further:

"But not every action nor every passion admits of a mean; for some have names that already imply badness, e.g. spite, shamelessness, envy, and in the case of actions adultery, theft, murder; for all of these and suchlike things imply by their names that they are themselves bad, and not the excesses or deficiencies of them. It is not possible, then, ever to be right with regard to them; one must always be wrong." --Both translated by W.D. Ross, 1908

I think Aristotle touched on something significant in these passages. What do you think? Is it right? Is it Biblical? Please share your thoughts. Don't just be a passive reader. Take time to think and let's generate some discussion.

What is Normal Anyway?

2011-11-21T14:16:00.001-05:00

"I can't wait for my life to be normal again." I say that a lot. Maybe you have too. For me, that statement is often followed up by "What is normal anyway?" I have heard others ask the same question. I have finally come up with an answer to that question.

When we say we want our lives to be "normal" again, we have, whether consciously or unconsciously, created an ideal in our minds about what our life should be like that we're not experiencing at the time. Oh, and it's usually selfish. When I say I can't wait for life to be normal again, what I'm actually saying is "I can't wait until I can live for myself again."

I'm recognizing in that time that I'm not in control of my life, and I want to be. I usually like my life to be predictable, consistent and I don't respond well to curve balls. I want to be able to run my plans, my way, be able to make and stick to my schedule without anybody intruding, and no outside inconveniences. It means a "normal" day at work that doesn't include rude or demanding customers, damaged products in my shipments to report, annoying phone calls or the endless chore of dusting. It means I get to have an uninterrupted lunch when I want, I get to leave on time, and go home to a fresh hot supper.

When I'm at home, it means I get to carry out my day as I planned, without any family interruptions, responsibilities or demands outside of what I have previously taken into account. It means there's not a whole lot of extra activities or events I have to attend that fill up my free time. That's a brief description. Basically, "normal" is a life centred around me. At the root, it's completely selfish.

Normal is nice, but it's not how we are called to live. Although normal can get boring too. But in times when I long for normal, I have to remind myself that my life and my time are not my own. I'm not in control of my life; God is. I need to give my days to him and be open to whatever else He has for me. I need to recognize that there may be other needs I'm called to meet that are more important than my own needs or wants. So do you. We aren't called to settle for the normal.

This leads me to something else I have been thinking about. When people get to know me, something that many notice is that I think. I think in a way and about issues that most teenagers don't. Most people mistake me for being much older than I really am. Some assure me it's not a bad thing, but it still annoys me. I guess you could say I'm not "normal" when compared to today's youth culture. But I think a better word would be "common." What we see among the youth in our day is common, but I don't think it should ever be normal. When I see what defines most of "normal" North American teens, I know I never want to be named among them.

As Christians, we aren't called to follow the norm. We aren't called to live "normal lives" characterized by selfishness, shallow thinking or the accepted lifestyle that defines today's youth. God has called each and every one of us to something greater, which we should desire to follow after. He desires for each of us to have a vision that goes beyond the expectations of this world. He desires for us to give our days and our plans to Him, because His plans for our lives are greater than our own and ultimately a lot more satisfying.

Normal can be nice, but there's more than enough to go around. Are you willing to let go of it and live an abnormal life, to go above the expectations of this world, to give your plans even for today to God and see what might happen? It's not always easy but I can guarantee you that it will surprise some people and will bring much more glory to God.

Justin and Christa: Their Story

2011-11-17T16:20:00.000-05:00

What would you do if you suffered from a disease for several years, experienced extreme pain and suffering on an almost daily basis, and saw no end or relief in sight? What would you do if you had to watch your spouse, the person whom you loved more than your own life, spend their days and nights in endless agony?

Most of us wouldn't even want to imagine something like that, but that's Justin and Christa Vanderham's story. Christa got very sick in New Zealand while attending a Bible school before she met Justin, but nobody could tell her what was wrong with her. When they did meet and later marry, her symptoms were up and down, and they had no idea what the future held for them.

The beginning of their marriage became marred with constant suffering. She was sick for over two years before she was finally diagnosed with Lyme disease. The agony they went through was unspeakable.

This video tells their story over the last several years. Honestly, it's no picnic. Some of the footage is very unpleasant and shows the seriousness of what she battles. But I'm glad I spent over an hour watching it.

I was blown away watching this. In all honesty, I'm a complete wimp. I never could have endured what Christa did. A few years ago I began having some digestive problems, and although I came out very lucky, I think I nearly excelled at the self-pity thing through that ordeal. Now, I still have to watch what I eat at times, but I'm healthy and realize I was have always been incredibly fortunate.

What amazed me the most was how Justin and Christa's love for each other and for God stayed so strong. I don't know how many men would have cared for their young brides the way Justin did. I think I can say Justin knows what it means to love his wife as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it.

Justin writes this on his blog on May 24:

"The stress and anguish of my heart are far too high to even think about food. 24 hours without sleep is common. I go days without realizing that I haven't taken a full breath because of the trauma we find ourselves in. Running up and down the stairs getting drugs, helping her throw up, pouring baths, giving her mouth-to-mouth oxygen, micro-waving heat bags, researching online, and making sad attempts at laundry and dishes is what fills most of my days.
I am no hero. If this is what being a hero is, I wouldn't recommend it..." (emphasis mine)

I've only had time to scan and read bits and pieces of their blogs, but both Justin and Christa have some great things to say that I look forward to reading more of.

Next to Justin and Christa's love and their ability to stay strong, I greatly admire the heart and love Christa has for other people. She had a few good weeks and she was in the kitchen not only cooking dinner for her and her husband, but others who were going through a hard time. Or she was making cards, writing to people, encouraging others, or giving massages from a hospital bed. How does one display such care and selflessness in the midst of their own suffering? God, and His love, is all I can come up with.

Yes, their video is a little long, but if you have time to watch a movie, watch their story instead. No, it won't make you laugh or leave you feeling warm and fuzzy, but I doubt you'll regret it. Also, check out their website and Justin and Christa's blogs. And pray for them that God would continue to bring healing to their lives.

Where Are the Men?

2011-11-08T10:25:00.000-05:00

I wrote an article for the girls a couple weeks ago, now this one is for the guys. Hold on tight! Some of you may write this post off, and I would understand why. I'm not here to bash men, but to share an article that addresses a common question among women, share my perspective, and hopefully encourage any guys who may end up reading this.

It's "Dude, Where's Your Bride?" by Kevin DeYoung. I loved this article and not just because it tells the men to be men. Kevin takes into account both sides of the problem, which is necessary. I laughed right off at the start where he made that remark about girls reading Just Do Something and thinking he would be sympathetic, because I knew exactly what he was talking about. I read the book a couple years ago and loved what he had to say on the marriage issue.

Before you go further, please read Kevin's article. It'll save me some explaining. It speaks best for itself. I'm just here to add my thoughts to it.

I've been reminded often of how lucky I am to be part of a church/youth group with nice guys who respect and look out for the girls. Not every young woman has that. But even so, the girls waaaay outnumber the guys. When people ask me why I'm single (even at my young age), I have a number of answers, but.....I hate to put it this way, (and it's certainly only a small aspect of the issue), but I can count the number of eligible men older than me in my church on one hand. And there's a lot of girls!!! I know there are churches who have the opposite problem, but I'm not about to go "church-shopping" in hopes of finding someone.

Even so, the issue does not rest solely on the shoulders of the men, and I think it was very needful for Kevin to address that. Some girls are simply desperate, and well, scare the guys away. Or they have impossible, fairy-talish standards. Many of these graduate women that are filling churches aren't pursuing careers because they're feminists, but because they have to find something to do in the meantime. Kevin addresses this matter more in depth in Just Do Something. Delayed marriage really does complicate education and career decisions for women. As much as they want to marry and raise a family, they have to find a way to be profitable now.

"If you are single, pray more for the sort of spouse you should be than for the sort of spouse you want." Yes! I've realized this more in my own life. If you want a great man, you have to be a great woman deserving of him! You can't expect to have it all, and he gets little in return. Keep praying for that amazing, godly man, but start praying more that God would change you to be that amazing, godly woman deserving of him! Very often, our idea of marriage during this season of life is totally selfish. Now's the time to turn it around.

Honestly, Kevin sums up perfectly what girls want in this one paragraph. Guys, we aren't asking for you to be rich and attain the world's definition of success. But this is what we are asking for.

"I don’t think young women are expecting Mr. Right to be a corporate executive with two houses, three cars, and a personality like Dale Carnegie. They just want a guy with some substance. A guy with plans. A guy with some intellectual depth. A guy who can winsomely take initiative and lead a conversation. A guy with consistency. A guy who no longer works at his play and plays with his faith. A guy with a little desire to succeed in life. A guy they can imagine providing for a family, praying with the kids at bedtime, mowing the lawn on Saturday, and being eager to take everyone to church on Sunday. Where are the dudes that will grow into men?"

I didn't share this to join the crowd of exulting women shouting "Preach it! Let 'em have it!" No, I just wanted to share my brief perspective on both sides of the issue. I want to encourage the men to rise up and be men and to share what it is that we as young women wish to see, at the same time acknowledging that we have a lot of work to do to be the wives you deserve. We don't expect you to be rich, but we want to see you have a vision and godly ambition, being leaders in the church and in the home, to be able to trust you to provide for our children, and we pray that we would be worthy of that.

180 Documentary: The Holocaust and Abortion

2011-10-29T12:25:00.000-04:00

This doesn't need any more words.

What Do I Do Now?

2011-10-24T13:29:00.001-04:00

Life is one big confusing jumble of decisions. I'm at an exciting transition point right now where I'll be making many in my life in the next few months. As much as I'm looking forward to it, a part of me doesn't want this season of my life to end. I feel like I was just starting to get some things figured out. I was excited about what I was able to do. And now, depending on what happens in the coming weeks and months, I might not have the time to do those things anymore.

I have only the last little fringe of my teenage years left, and I already wish I had done some things differently. I already wish I had made more of them. And I know there are thousands of young people, especially young women, who are walking the same path I did and are discontent. I want to speak to you specifically today, although I encourage all my readers to go through to the end.

I have come to believe that a part of the reason many Christian young women waste away their single years in discontentment is because they haven't found anything meaningful to do with their time. Many finish school, with plans of being a homemaker someday, which is great, but then they just sit around waiting for life to happen, waiting for Prince Charming. They get stuck and start to feel lost during their in-between years and grow very discontent.

That pretty much sums up the last few years of my life. I'll be honest. I used to think I would get married young. Like, by now. I'm still here, as single as ever. But I'm happier now. Yes, I still wonder how soon I will get married. Probably almost every day. But I've also started to fear how soon I will get married. Why? Because I have discovered something that excites me and I want to pursue that fully! And I now have the best time of my life to do it, and it is oh, so short. I don't have enough time to do all I want!

As Christians, we're often told not to follow the feminist expectations of our culture. I agree. But I'm also beginning to wonder if our young women are falling into a trap, by following the expectations of the church in some cases. The church often likes to lay out it's own set of expectations for us. It may go something like this: finish school, stay at home with your parents while you prepare to be a godly wife and homemaker, get married, have babies and homeschool one big, happy family! Or go into missions if you're to singleness. Something like that. That's great, until you run into a problem.

Becoming a godly woman is an ongoing process. Although spiritual maturity is important when considering marriage, you don't have to attain a certain degree of perfection first. (I believed that lie for awhile.) I already know how to cook, bake, clean, do laundry and all those other things that come into managing a household. What do I do now???? I have to do more than grow spiritually and help Mom keep house. Well, get a job. Done. Life is still more than all that and work. It won't be the end of discontentment.

I think part of the problem is many young women aren't keeping busy with meaningful pursuits. They spend so much time thinking about their futures and waiting for life to happen. The truth is, life is happening, and it's in your hands. Do something great with it!

Simply put, find something that gets you excited, seek the Lord about it, and then pursue it with all your heart. I'm talking about something you always long to do, and get super enthusiastic every time you do it or even think about it. It will be different for everyone. For me, this has come in the form of studying classics/literature. I get so excited about it sometimes, I literally squeal. And I have few people in my life who share my interest in it.

I want to take a moment aside to discuss the issue of education. Young women in some Christian circles are often discouraged from pursuing further education or preparing for a career, especially if they desire, or are expected to be homemakers. It doesn't seem practical and sometimes it's simply not affordable. Very often, you won't even use it later on. That's exactly why I haven't done it. But someone once told me you can only teach your children what you know.

Education doesn't have to mean a degree or studying in a formal setting. Education comes when you're inspired to learn. You can do that at home. Determine what you want to study, whether it's as broad as literature, or even just a new skill or computer program, and you can do a lot through books and online resources. That's what I'm doing right now. I'm learning now what I want to put into my children to raise, teach, and inspire them to be the godly leaders this world needs. It's much easier to learn a lot of that now, than later on when I'm trying to take care of them all.

Girls, find something you love, pray about it, then pursue it with all your heart. Catch a vision, and follow it. If you can work part-time to make some money, and help at home and work on your pursuits the other part of the week, that's fantastic. I have loved being able to do that. If you want to learn, study. If you have a special gift or talent, hone it and creatively use that to bless others. Spend time serving in your church or community. If you have a burden for the lost, bring the Gospel to them. If it's for the sick and needy; minister to them. If you have a burden for slaves and the sex trade, look into volunteering for the International Justice Mission. If you grieve over abortion, be a voice for those babies. Search your area for organizations where you can use your time and skills to bless the world and make a difference.

There is so much we as young women can do with our single years. They don't have to be wasted in discontentment, waiting for life to happen. Yes, we still face certain roadblocks, but there's so much we can do more effectively and easily now than when we're raising a family. We have time and a lot less responsibilities. There are dreams we can pursue. We can find purpose and fulfillment now. Don't wait till it's too late then look back and wish you had done more with this time in your life. You don't have to follow someone else's definition of success. Just set goals, develop a plan, then follow the desires that God places within your heart.

I could say more, but I will end with something author James L. Rubart wrote last week. I've read something similar before and it's really got me thinking. "At the end of the age I don't think Jesus will say, 'Did you sell a bunch of books?' I think he's more likely to say, 'Did you follow the passion I put inside you with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength, no matter the outcome?'" I want to be able to say "Yes!" to that.

Why Do You Follow Christ?

2011-10-19T16:48:00.001-04:00

I have been studying a small portion of The Republic by Plato the past couple weeks. It was a conversation on the meaning of justice, whether or not justice is a virtue, and whether a just man was happier than an unjust man. The common belief among man was that injustice was far more profitable than justice, and that the unjust man, being able to do whatsoever he pleases without suffering the consequences was far happier than the just man, especially if he was thought to be unjust. They believed that although justice was better than injustice, it was grievous and was only to be endured for benefits in the afterlife. Plato himself, however, believed that man should be just simply for the sake of being just, not for the sake of any reward.

In this conversation, a man named Adeimantus makes an interesting statement regarding man's motivation in pursuing justice:

"Parents and tutors are always telling their sons and their wards that they are to be just; but why? not for the sake of justice, but for the sake of character and reputation; in the hope of obtaining for him who is reputed just some of those offices, marriages, and the like which Glaucon has enumerated among the advantages accruing to the unjust from the reputation of justice."

At first this idea that people are only just because of the rewards that are promised to them seemed to me a selfish idea. But as I thought about it, I realized this is largely what Christians do. Many Christians follow Christ simply for the reward at the end, for the promise of heaven when the toils of this life are over. The Christian life is filled with decisions where we have to deny ourselves what our flesh wants and choose to be obedient to Him. We often don't do it because we want to, but because of the blessings or rewards we are promised if we do. And, of course, to avoid death and hell.

Is this a right approach to the Christian life? Does Christ not deserve to be loved simply for who He is, for the fact that God created us, and He redeemed us from our sin? Is He not worthy of our love even without all the rewards and blessings He promises? It should be, but that is not the case in the lives of many Christians. Many come to Christ initially to escape hell, many continue in the faith for the same, and for the promise of heaven. I must admit that I myself am guilty in part.

What would happen if the promise of heaven was taken away? Would we still love and follow our Lord? Would He not be worthy of our love and devotion either way? But then I have to wonder, would there have been a point in Christ's death and resurrection if not to grant us eternal life?

I am reminded that Jesus died for us for the sake of a reward. Jesus Himself "for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God." (Heb. 12:2, ESV) Christ Himself has His eyes on a reward when He died on the cross. He came to break the curse of death that sin brought into the world. He didn't do it simply to save us from our sin, but to restore us to fellowship with our Maker and that we might one day be in His presence, see Him face to face and share in His glory. So, it seems to me that the reward of heaven was a part of His purpose, but that shouldn't be the only reason we follow Him.

Like justice, following Christ comes with a price. Yes, He promised us an eternal reward for our faithfulness, but it comes at a cost. Jesus said so Himself. Along with the blessings, He promised us trials and tribulations. Is it worth it? I believe it is. We can look around at the unjust of this world, and they may seem happy, they may look like they have it made, but they don't. I personally don't think it's possible for a man to live his whole life in sin and be truly happy, no matter how well thought of he is, how much recognition and possessions he has. Deep down, his conscience will condemn him. And whatever happiness he does have will last only until he dies.

Justice and the Christian life are wonderful. But both come with a price and a reward. So, I ask you, why do you follow Christ?

The Great Books Reader

2011-10-18T10:51:00.000-04:00

Introducing: My New Project! Well, one of them at least. It's called The Great Books Reader: Excerpts and Essays on the Most Influential Books in Western Civilization and edited by John Mark Reynolds.

Working in the book industry, I often get to discover great titles long before they come out and this was one of them. So I was eagerly anticipating the release of this book, and it ended up getting delayed by over two months. Frustrating.

Now, for a little background on the book. It was compiled by John Mark Reynolds, founder and director of the Torrey Honors Institute, the Great Books program at Biola University in California. I tell ya, there's some universities I wish I could pick up and move here, and Biola is one of them. Then if tuition paid for itself, I'd be all set. This liberal arts and biblical studies program is like one of those far distant dreams that will never be realized.

I didn't really know what to expect before I got the book. I didn't have a chance to preview it before I purchased it. Being a couple inches thick and weighing nearly three pounds, it's a good-sized book. It contains excerpts and essays on 30 different classics. It was designed for those who didn't have the opportunity to study at a university to be introduced to these works. People like me! And the best thing is, it examines these works in a Christian context. In his introduction, Reynolds explains why Christians should be well-read and how to approach the great books. He explains how to go about studying these excerpts and bringing the ideas in line with God's Word.

I began by reading the selection of The Odyssey by Homer. After working on it for a couple days, I must admit, I didn't really "get the point." However, I wasn't ready to give up after that. Next was an excerpt of The Republic by Plato, which I'm still working on. Can I say WOW!!?? I got so excited reading it that I could hardly contain my joy. I think I'm still just in the beginning of this study. I'm pondering the meaning of justice, why people choose to be just, how we view justice or injustice and so forth. That may sound boring to you, but there really is something thrilling about reading a work from around 2500 years ago, understanding their view of the world and human nature, and realizing that a lot of ideas really haven't changed! It's incredibly inspiring!

I have a lot of work ahead of me. In the coming months, I'll be diving into the likes of Augustine, Dante, Milton, Wesley, Shakespeare, Tolstoy, Chesterton and much more. Oh, then there's my other projects in between all that. I get excited about all this stuff. Yes, to get the full benefit, you have to do some tough thinking, but it is so rewarding.

"Readers lead, but the surrounding world does not encourage us to take the time to read. It has never been easier to get books but never harder to find the quiet needed to study them." --John Mark Reynolds

Proverbs 3:13, 14 (ESV)
Blessed is the one who finds wisdom,
and the one who gets understanding,
for the gain from her is better than gain from silver
and her profit better than gold.

Adam Young: Music and Blog

2011-10-11T12:20:00.001-04:00

Today I reveal another one of my secrets. That is, my enjoyment of Adam Young's music and blog. Owl City, for those of you who don't recognize the name. There, I said it. I don't doubt some of my readers will be surprised at my interest in his genre of music (electro pop), but truth be told, it is just SO MUCH FUN!!! It has a happiness effect. Yes, I know there are many starry-eyed girls out there who dream of marrying him, but rest assured, I am NOT one of them.

Adam's music is hard to describe. It's like he lives in a totally different world. His imagination is simply incredible! His lyrics range from fun, romantic, colourful, thoughtful, intense, to just plain cute and sweet! Sure, half of his lines don't make any sense, but that makes it all the more fun!

I can't remember when I was first introduced to Owl City, but I'm guessing it was likely when "Fireflies" became a hit. Shortly thereafter, I was surprised to discover that the singer, Adam Young, was a Christian! The only song on his album "Ocean Eyes" that reflected his faith was "Meteor Shower." His new album "All Things Bright and Beautiful" reflects his faith much more, which disappointed many of his fans, but I for one loved it. The most overtly Christian, and probably also my favourite song on his recent album is "Galaxies." The song is actually about Adam's perspective of the 1986 space shuttle Challenger explosion, and he also has an introduction fitting for it. He also does a beautiful cover of the hymn "In Christ Alone". I could write brief commentaries on almost all his songs, but then this would get entirely too long.

I've also been following Adam's blog. Did I mention he was an excellent writer? His blog displays his imagination and creativity as much as his music. Being an extreme introvert, he shared an article a few months back called "10 Myths About Introverts." Almost everything in that article describes me. I loved it! He writes romantic little stories like "I'll See You in My Dreams" and "I'll Follow You" that will make any girl's heart flutter. He also writes about his trusting God to be bring that special girl into his life. I was so encouraged by the following words at the end of his article "Sharks Keep Moving":

"Above and beyond all of this, I take great joy and comfort in knowing my Savior has it all blueprinted and planned down to the tiniest detail, and that my job isn’t to blubber and worry about the design — but to hush. To be concerned with the principles of morality, servanthood, discipleship and character, and ultimately, to trust.
For what is faith without trust?"

I've also appreciated his more devotional like posts, where he shares his insights on scripture and also his recent thoughts on John Piper's book Desiring God. It made me want to read that book again.

Christians have varying thoughts on Owl City, but there's much I have learned and appreciated through him. I think he sees beauty in this world that we often miss and he knows how to capture it and put it into words. Sometimes that means it doesn't make any real sense, but it places in me a sense of wonder and awe. I'm inspired to dream and use my God-given imagination and open my eyes to the beauty around me. And, well, like I said, it's fun and makes me happy! :)

Courageous Review

2011-10-03T11:15:00.000-04:00

I went to see "Courageous" yesterday afternoon. It was about time. I had been hearing about this movie for nearly two years and had people asking me about it frequently recently, thinking it was already out on DVD. I didn't think they would play it in Canada, since none of Sherwood's previous films had so far. But "Courageous" did come to Canada, and I drove an hour with some friends to see it. Was it worth it? Yes!

This story was based around four police officers, who through tragedy, make a resolution to be the men and fathers that God has called them to be. There's another family involved as well, which I appreciated. It gave the story more depth. I also appreciated the fact that the men all had different family backgrounds and their stories ended differently, making it more realistic. It wasn't a movie about five guys signing a Resolution and it all being smooth sailing thereon in. It showed it for the tough stuff it really was. They touched on a lot of different topics in the movie, but I never got the sense that it was too much. The film also contained a salvation message, but it was worked into the story better than in their previous film. In "Fireproof", I kind of felt like they stopped the story for a minute to preach a salvation message, which, don't get me wrong, was good, but could have been done better. Overall, "Courageous" was a good story, filled with action, humour, and tear jerking moments.

I had determined before going to see this movie to pack tissues in my purse. And sitting in the theatre just before it started, I remembered I had forgotten. I could have used them. I was a very emotional movie, but it also contained some great humour and I enjoyed the best, although most painful laugh I had had in a long time.

On the downside, the acting in some scenes was a little weak but it had a good script. There's nothing worse than watching a low-budget Christian film with bad acting and a bad script. Also, I found that in some places, the mood changed too abruptly. I wished at times they would have given us a little more time to enjoy the happy moments. Probably, one of my greatest disappointments was the fact that they left the "theme song," if you will right until the end of the credits. Casting Crowns wrote the song "Courageous" for the movie, and it's an excellent song, but many people don't stick around to the end of the credits to actually hear it! Here are some of my favourite lines of the song that apply to all of us:

"The only way we'll ever stand
Is on our knees with lifted hands"

"In the war of my mind
I will take my stand
In the battle of my heart
And the battle of the hand"

No, this wasn't a movie directed at me. It was a movie mainly about fathers, but I believe there's something in there for everyone. I walked away thinking about areas in my own life I need to work on, areas where I need to strive for more honour and godliness. It made me want to hold out for a godly, courageous man and to be deserving of him. It made me want to pray more consistently for my future husband, that God would prepare him to be that courageous leader of our home. Frankly, we all need to be courageous. We all need to take back the fight in some area of our life. I know I do.

If you haven't seen "Courageous", I would encourage you to go see it. If you don't want to spend the money, wait til it's out on DVD. It makes a good family movie, although some of the action and themes may be too intense for your young children. Either way, it's a film we can all benefit from in some way. Now I'm ready to see Sherwood make a movie for the women.

Christian Singing for Queen?

2011-09-27T15:49:00.001-04:00

Marc Martel has finally made the news! The lead singer of Canadian Christian band Downhere has loads of talent, and I've enjoyed a lot of Downhere's music for several years. (I say a lot because there's next to no artists of whom I can say I like all their music.) The band started at a Bible school in Saskatchewan, brings a unique style to Christian music, and has been active for the past 10 years.

Many fans have thought Marc Martel sounded a lot like Freddie Mercury of Queen, and so now Marc decided to audition for a Queen cover band recently. His "Somebody to Love" audition went up on Youtube last Tuesday and in one week, it has gotten nearly 3 million views. I don't listen to Queen, but I must say he sings it very well. I don't have to hear an original to know that.

Now, as I said, Marc's talent isn't news to me. He has sung several different styles of music and I was long ago introduced to his cover of the Bohemian Rhapsody on Youtube, which I admit I enjoyed for his talent, not because I care for the style. He's also done excellent covers of a couple of Keith Green's songs and performed the opera piece "Nessun Dorma".

So, he sings Christian stuff, opera, and songs by Queen. That's an interesting combination and he's doing it well, in my opinion. But I'm sure there's a crowd of Christians expressing their disappointment or horror. How can a Christian sing songs by Queen? How could that possibly glorify God? I mean, have you heard some of Freddie's lyrics? Some may say that listening to it is bad enough, and now he wants to be part of a cover band?

It could be very controversial. Would I do it or recommend it? No, I wouldn't and I won't expect you to listen to it. But I appreciate talent when I see it, and through a lot of hard work, Marc has done some amazing stuff with his voice. I've enjoyed a lot of Downhere's music, and I will continue to do so. You should check it out. Some of my favourite songs by them are "Calmer of the Storm", "So Blue", "Great Are You", "Not About Wings", and "Unbelievable". Enjoy!

They Don't Believe It Anymore

2011-09-21T11:00:00.000-04:00

I've been writing about books a lot lately, so now I'm going to focus a little on music. I've been noticing a trend in music lately. Not in Christian music, but rather in "secular music", if you want to use that term. I don't usually hear a lot, so maybe I'm not a proper judge in the matter, but it seems that there's a lot more songs out there these days about broken relationships than beautiful love songs. Probably the closest thing to love songs I hear when I go to the mall are sexual.

Basically, the world doesn't seem to believe anymore that love can last, that marriages can stay together, and it's largely reflected in the world's music. Yes, I could easily mention a number of songs that do still believe in a sweet, lasting love, but I think heartache may be fast taking over. Music seems to be stripping away the fairy tale dreams many girls have and forcing a reality check. Prince Charming doesn't exist and neither does Cinderella.

Taylor Swift's song "Love Story" was followed up by songs like "White Horse" and "Mine". In "White Horse" she sings:

"I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairytale
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet
Lead her up the stairwell
This ain't Hollywood, this is a small town
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down
Now it's too late for you and your white horse to come around."

"Mine" ends much more positively, but near the beginning she says "I was a flight risk with a fear of falling, wondering why we ever bother with love if it never lasts."

Mat Kearney's song "Ships in the Night" echos a similar message:

"Like ships in the night
You keep passing me by
Just wasting time
Trying to prove who's right
And if it all goes crashing into the sea
If it's just you and me
Trying to find the light"

"How many of our parents seem to make it anyway?
We're just fumbling through the gray
Trying to find a heart that's not walking away."

Josh Groban sings a touching song called "War at Home" centred around families. Yes, there's pain, but in the midst, there's still a willingness to fight.

Yes, these are only very few examples, and the lyrics I provided are only snippets, but a recurring idea in many songs is the fact that the artists haven't seen it work out. Children grow up seeing their parents' marriages fall apart, their friends marry and the same thing happens. Girls grow up to believe that guys are only after one thing. Guys think they have to "conquer" the girls in order to be a man. So they settle for casual dating or one night stands. Society really hasn't offered us much hope.

What about the church? Are Christians offering us hope? Divorces among Christians are increasing all the time. Do our young people have reason to believe that a lasting love is possible?

I'm speaking from a single young woman's perspective. I'm a dreamer, just like countless other girls who long for a happily ever after ending, but many have tried to crush that dream. No, I'm not deserving of the man I hope to marry, but I want to be. No, he won't be perfect, but I admit I do often have that idea. Yes, I know it takes work and although sometimes I wonder how it's possible, I understand there will be rough spots in the road. But I know it is possible. I know we can prepare now for a beautiful future and God-honouring marriage.

No, the world may not believe it's possible anymore. They may give up on love songs and happily ever after. But I'm not giving up hope yet.

Jane Eyre: What I Learned

2011-09-13T16:06:00.000-04:00

For the past six months, I spent a lot of time reading and studying Jane Eyre. With being busy and reading other books at the same time, this study got drawn out a lot longer than I would have liked it to, but it was a rewarding six months. I have shared some of my thoughts on the book on this blog previously, and by clicking the Jane Eyre tag at the bottom of the article, you can see all the other ones.

While reading, I worked through some of my own thoughts on whether a child's behaviour is justified by her authority's actions, the effectiveness of discipline, love being blind and pondering through some of my favourite conversations and quotes. I think some of my ideas have changed somewhat by now. At the end, I worked through two sets of discussion questions related to the plot, characters, issues of feminism, self-respect, social status, Christian morality, salvation, love and marriage.

One of the biggest challenges at the end was determining Jane's philosophy of God. Then I had to determine the philosophy of love and marriage for several main characters as well as develop my own. If any of my readers express a curiosity in it, I might share it in a later post. I also discussed the importance of marriage, the rules that govern it, and how it impacts society among many other issues.

Literature has so much to offer us. Having studied one book on my own with a little help, I have determined that the study of the classics is worth it. Yes, I had to think hard, and there's times I just wanted to skip over things. But I think we learn best when we are inspired to learn, when we choose to think and answer those tough questions, rather than when we are forced to.

So pick up a classic and be inspired to learn and I'll enjoy Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility.

Service = Greatness

2011-09-07T14:44:00.001-04:00

"This is a great key to life: lose your life in service and you will become great. Do what is right, even when it is difficult, especially when it is difficult. Do not make the mistake of being a social climber. Of course you will want to use your knowledge and skills and talents to do great things, but do them because they are right, because they are good, not because they make you look good." --Oliver DeMille, A Thomas Jefferson Education

Luke 22:24-27 (ESV)
"A dispute also arose among them, as to which of them was to be regarded as the greatest. And he said to them, "The kings of the Gentiles exercise lordship over them, and those in authority over them are called benefactors. But not so with you. Rather, let the greatest among you become the youngest, and the leader as one who serves. For who is greater, one who reclines at table or one who serves? Is it not the one who reclines at table? But I am among you as the one who serves."

You Tell On Yourself

2011-09-03T13:31:00.000-04:00

You tell on yourself by the friends you seek,

By the very manner in which you speak,

By the way you employ your leisure time,

By the use you make of dollar and dime.

You tell what you are by the things you wear,

By the spirit in which your burdens you bear,

By the kind of things at which you laugh,

By the records you play on your phonograph.

You tell what you are by the way you walk,

By the things of which you delight to talk,

By the manner in which you bear defeat,

By so simple a thing as how you eat.

By the books you choose from a well-filled shelf

In these ways and more, you tell on yourself.

So there's really no particle of sense

In an effort to keep up false pretense.

--Author Unknown

Randy Alcorn on Speculative Faith

2011-09-02T18:44:00.001-04:00

Randy Alcorn just wrote a two part article for Speculative Faith. In Part 1, he explains his love for sci-fi and fantasy, how great fiction points to Biblical truth, and why Christians often avoid the genre. In Part 2, he explains his novelization of the movie Courageous, and how anticipating the New Earth changes our lives.

I haven't read any full-length books by Randy Alcorn, but I greatly appreciated some of the ideas he spoke about in these articles. I personally enjoy the speculative genre, although I haven't read that much of it yet. The more I read Speculative Faith, the more I understand why Christians love it. This is what Alcorn says:

"Is God’s imagination less than that of his image-bearers? Or is the height of human imagination at its best a reflection of the infinite creativity of the divine mind?

When we get excited reading Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings trilogy or Lewis’s The Chronicles of Narnia, it’s not our sinfulness that arouses that excitement. It’s our God-given hunger for adventure, for new realms and new beings, for new beauties and new knowledge. God has given us a longing for new worlds."

This kind of made me go "Whoa!! God has an imagination!!" He thought up the whole universe and spoke it into being. Out of nothing, He created the stars, planets, and everything we can see and can't see in this world. He placed us in this crazy drama called Life to be a part of His story.

We, being created in His image, also have an imagination. Many of the things we enjoy on a daily basis are the product of man's imagination. We have a desire to create and tell stories because He did it first and put that desire within us! Human beings have created some amazing things, but it's only a small reflection of what God has done. And the crazy things is, God's not even done yet! He's going to create a new world which will be better than this one. How awesome isn't that?

I love what Alcorn says in Part 2:

"Are you living with the disappointment of unfulfilled dreams? In Heaven you’ll find their fulfillment! Did poverty, poor health, war, or lack of time prevent you from pursuing an adventure or dream? Did you never get to finish building that boat or painting that picture or writing that book—or reading that pile of books? Good news. On the New Earth you will have a second chance to do what you dreamed of doing—and far more besides."

I really hope that part about the books is true. This is going to sound extremely vain, but I've wondered about that a lot lately. I like reading, but I'm no speed reader. I can't finish a full-length book in a few hours like some people can. I like details and I usually want every single one.

So when I discover a new book, it goes on a list, and I add to that list often. At this point, I have about 200-300 books I decided at some point I wanted to read, plus tons more if-I-get-to-it books. And with new stuff always coming out and my slow progress, I'm so afraid I'll never finish in my lifetime and I'll miss out on something great. And I honestly wonder if maybe I can read them in the next life, where time will no longer be a problem. Yes, that just sounded really pathetic, but this seriously has been on my mind. (I can almost hear my readers laughing at me right now.)

I have read about 20 books so far this year, but I have spent the last 6 months reading and studying Jane Eyre. I still have the hardest thinking ahead of me and I will have to decide what I believe on some very important issues. I've definitely wondered how fast universities cover this material. At times I'm afraid my brain might break, but I've learned so much, it's been worth it.

At my rate, it looks impossible, but Alcorn has given me a sliver of hope. I may not be able to cover everything, but with the time I have, I will appreciate the imagination God has given mankind, think, learn, seek great things and pursue the dreams He has put within me. I don't know what the New Earth will all hold, but I don't think we have reason to wonder if we'll be disappointed. I think God's imagination has yet to blow us away.

Weird Christians

2011-09-01T21:27:00.000-04:00

I finally read a book this week over the course of a few days that I've had my eye on for a couple years. The cover and title had enough appeal for me to buy it. It's not a new book, but the message will never grow outdated.

Weird Christians I Have Met by Philip Baker is a book about ten types of weird Christians and a plea for balance in the Christian life. I like to say that everybody's weird in their own way. It makes me feel better. I can't say I would have used the word "weird" in the title of this book. Most of the people Baker talks about just overemphasize one area of the Christian life and disregard another.

The author gives each of his characters a self-explanatory name and face. There's End-Time Ed, Pentecostal Pamela, Theological Theo, Demonic Dave, Frank Faith, Backslidden Bob, Gullible Garfield, Judgmental Jill, Prosperity Patricia, and Plastic Pete. For the not so straight-forward ones, Demonic Dave always thinks the devil made him do it, Frank Faith thinks we just need to have more faith, Gullible Garfield believes every new teaching he hears, and Plastic Pete has to put on a show so everyone thinks his life is good.

Now, most of these characters have some positive qualities, but the negative definitely outweigh them. Of course, picking up a book like this made me go "Who am I?" I was feeling pretty good when I got close to the end and hadn't seen much of myself in any of them. I do have some Judgmental Jill in me, although I'm really working on that. I thought maybe I'd be the perfectly balanced Christian. I wish.

I got slapped when it came to Plastic Pete. I don't like to think of myself as inauthentic, but I can be pretty good at making it look like my life is all good when it's not. I really appreciated a lot of what the author had to say about Pete, but some of it kind of hurt. A lot of it was true of my life. You see, Plastic Pete has a really hard time letting people know he has problems in his life and confessing sin. He can probably identify with the Let's Not Talk About That post I wrote awhile ago. And part of it, as Philip Baker points out, is the church's fault.

"One of the compounding problems that Pete faces is that many churches encourage his behavior. Peer pressure or theological persuasion create an atmosphere that is hostile to honesty. Judgment and disapproval fall quickly on those who admit to struggle, and rather than risk social or religious excommunication, Pete stays quiet."

"Plastic Petes pretend everything is okay when it's not. They perceive that to admit fault, confess sin, and share problems will only bring intense shame, both from God and from other Christians."

Yep, that's pretty much the way I think. That's why if you ask me how I'm doing, and I say I'm okay, I'm usually really not. I just don't want to talk to you about it. It's hard to believe that the truth sets people free. It's a tough kind of person to be, not just for others, but for yourself as well.

Lately, I've started getting tired of playing the game, and I'll slowly begin to open up to people and be real. As much as Christians hate fakers, I think sometimes they fear authenticity. Sometimes, when Christians start being "real", I get scared and annoyed. But now I'm starting to sympathize more with them because I have major problems too.

Overall, I really appreciated this book. It was a light, easy read and made the point quickly. It identified areas where Christians need more balance, and I think we'd all be a happier bunch if we found it quickly.

Don't Make Me Sick

2011-08-29T14:01:00.001-04:00

I mentioned in my last post that I was reading Words by Ginny L. Yttrup. Don't ask me how to pronounce it. I don't know. But I have finished the book. I didn't want to write about this book. I wanted to read a book for enjoyment and not have to think and take notes. You'll wonder at my choice in a moment. I knew I wanted to read this book before it came out. It sounded so intriguing. But I must admit though I had my doubts about the painful storyline.

Words is mainly told from two perspectives. It starts with Kaylee, a ten-year old girl, abandoned by her mother and sexually abused by the boyfriend she left behind with her child. Yeah, tough stuff. To escape her horrible reality, she reads and collects words. Due to the trauma she has endured, though, she stops speaking, so those words remain confined to her mind and paper.

The second perspective is Sierra's, a woman who is holding onto the pain of being responsible for the death of her baby daughter 12 years earlier. As predicted, their lives connect and they eventually both find freedom in Christ and healing from their past.

Although the plot seemed a little far-fetched at times, I really enjoyed this book because of how the author dealt with such a painful subject. Many books that deal with similar topics often contain graphic detail and cause your stomach to churn. I like detail, and sometimes it's necessary, but not too much in these cases. The most graphic details in the book were related to drug abuse.

How does an author write a book about abuse and effectively connect with the reader without being graphic? Easy. Tell the story from the abused child's perspective. A child who is alone, scared, embarrassed, ashamed, and thinks it's her fault. A child who refuses to tell anyone, or should I say, write it for anyone. A child who wonders if she's a whore. A child who will only elude to what's happening to her and shares with the reader how it affects her. That tugs at the reader enough without graphic details.

In the back of the book, we also learn that the author wrote this book out of personal experience and now helps women suffering trauma from sexual abuse. She knows. She understand what victims suffer and makes her the perfect candidate to write such a story.

I've read some great books and I enjoy detail, but when dealing with such difficult issues, you can do without and still write a great story. In some cases, details become necessary, but not always. Writers can connect with me without having to make me sick.

Books and Random Conversations

2011-08-23T11:51:00.002-04:00

I had an appointment to go to yesterday morning before heading to work, and as usual, I brought a book along to pass the waiting time. This time it was a novel called Words by Ginny L. Yttrup, which I will likely write about in the near future. I was sitting in a large waiting room, all alone, when a man walks in, pauses in front of me, as I'm focused on my book and strikes up a conversation. "That's something you never see anymore!"

I look up and he explains how long it had been since he had seen a person, especially a young one reading a physical book in a waiting room. Apparently tablets are becoming a lot more popular than paper. In the 20 minutes or so that followed, I had discussions with three complete strangers about the direction of the book and music industries, e-readers, cell phones, other technology, teenagers and social etiquette. I left feeling inspired and filled with joy that carried me through the rest of the day.

I'm amazed at the discovery I just made. I never would have thought that something so small and seemingly insignificant could lead to something so meaningful. The book I was reading was of no significance. It was simply the fact that I was reading a paper book. Maybe the fact that I was young, dressed for work and looking preppy had more to do with it. I really don't know. But a book for me produced an opportunity.

In 20 minutes, I had a chance to share my perspective with individuals much older than myself. I had a chance to show them that there are teens out there who think differently than the rest of the world. I had a chance to put a smile on their faces. I had a chance to share what I've been learning and why I have made some of the decisions I have. I left feeling not only inspired, but also that what I have to say really does matter.

Here's what I have to tell my readers. The small, seemingly insignificant things you do matter, even if you'd rather use a Kindle over paper. Your choices in all areas of life hold the power to impact. Don't be afraid to be counter cultural. When opportunities present themselves, don't be afraid to share your perspective. Even if you don't have a chance to share the Gospel, if they can see that your life is different, that you're not following the norm, you never know what kind of seeds you may plant and what fruit they may later produce.

Why do I read physical books? Because I simply love a physical book. I prefer to read off of paper than a glaring screen. Don't get me wrong. I use my computer a lot and make use of the countless online resources available to me. Although some people have encouraged me to purchase a Kindle, I'm not quite ready for that. Yes, the idea of being able to carry my whole library around in my purse is enticing, but I still love seeing books on a shelf. Books are meant to be shared. Technology has provided alternatives for so many things, and I love it, but I'm not quite ready to let go of my books.

Here are a couple of articles I wrote that I used in my conversations yesterday. Who would have thought the ideas I ponder on my blog could prove to be so useful in everyday life?
Why I Don't Have a Cell Phone
New Trends in Education

Thinking is Hard

2011-08-22T21:02:00.001-04:00

"Your exposure to greatness changes you: your ideas are bigger, your dreams wilder, your plans more challenging, your faith more powerful.

The classics can be hard work, and that is exactly what is needed to learn to think. Thinking is hard; deep thinking is not entertaining or easy. Thinking is like exercise, it requires consistency and rigor. Like barbells in a weightlifting room, the classics force us to think. Not just in a rote memory way, either. The classics make us struggle, search, ponder, seek, analyze, discover, decide, and reconsider. As with physical exercise, the exertion leads to pleasing results as we metamorphose and experience the pleasure of doing something wholesome and difficult that changes us for the better." --Oliver De Mille, A Thomas Jefferson Education

Boston Trip

2011-08-18T16:14:00.000-04:00

Last week, I had the great privilege of visiting Boston and surrounding area. It was a trip full of a lot of first experiences and jumping out of my comfort zone. I flew, saw the ocean, and rode subways for the first time and did a host of other things. I know that's all a little shocking, but it's true.

When I first flew in and went into the city, it was a bit of a culture shock. Where I live, I'm very unaccustomed to city life, and here I was in a different country, a big city and trying to take in all the things around me. It was a little overwhelming. There's vendors on many streets selling food, drinks, produce, pastries, souvenirs and it's almost like walking through a fair or farmer's market in some areas.

The first day I was able to make a far too short visit to the Museum of Fine Arts. Beautiful! You don't need a lot of knowledge or interest in art to enjoy a place like that. A little appreciation for beauty and talent will do. I came the day after the Chihuly exhibit ended, which was unfortunate, but they still had a few of his pieces on display. That evening I went to a singles event at a Boston church and heard a professor from Gordon Conwell Theological Seminary speak. I wish I could have wrapped that whole talk up and taken it home with me. I got to end the night by walking a long way through the city after dark in a torrential downpour.

I saw a lot of things in Boston, but the problem was there was so much to take in, I don't remember it all. I did see a number of historical sites, the Freedom Trail, the City Hall, the Boston Library, a Steinway store and expensive fashion taste on Newbury Street. I also climbed Beacon Hill and enjoyed stepping out of the busy city scene and relaxing in the Boston Common and Public Garden. I feel like I saw a lot, but it was only a tiny portion of the city

For the remaining days of my stay I visited smaller towns in the area, which have some of the coolest shops, art galleries, taffy factories, restaurants, bakeries and more. These are the kinds of towns I often saw in pictures, but rarely saw for myself. I was going to bring back postcards, but couldn't find any that did the places justice.

Last but not least, I got to spend a couple afternoons at the ocean. The cold, clear water, sun and sand were so refreshing. I enjoyed boogie boarding, as long as my head stayed above the water. Salt water tastes nasty. I don't know how anybody could find that taste pleasant. I saw a lot of jellyfish eggs on one beach, which was pretty neat.

I even enjoyed the simple pleasure of sitting at the airport with coffee, a giant cookie and a book waiting for my flight home. Home to heat and humidity I didn't miss at all. But I loved coming home as well.

There's a random, brief snapshot of my vacation. Envy me yet?

New Trends in Education

2011-08-17T14:31:00.001-04:00

Best Colleges Online recently posted an article on their blog called 8 Important Education Trends in Generation Z. I've had a great interest in education recently, so articles like this catch my attention. It's clear that education in our day is changing. I can't say I think all the changes I see happening are good, but it's good to understand them.

I'm all for interactive and visual learning. I think it's excellent when parents or teachers can come up with fun ways for their children to learn. I work in a store that sells a number of these materials. The use of games and activities a child enjoys should never be a primary tool in teaching, but they make excellent supplements that are fun and reinforce what they're learning.

I'm also very excited about the growth in homeschooling. Homeschooling as we know it today is a rather new movement that started only a few decades ago. Parents decide to teach their children at home for many reasons and they often face a lot of criticism for choosing to do so. I wrote about one objection recently in my post The Kids' Social Club. Although there will always be negative examples, homeschooling is an excellent alternative if done well and many homeschooled children grow up to be successful adults and entrepreneurs. The vast amount of online resources available also give children a great learning experience.

I must say I'm a little wary though about the overuse of technology in education and I'm not sure how I feel about bringing iPads into schools. Now it's very common for children to be able to efficiently use computers and electronics before they can even read or write. Children easily become addicted to electronics, become inactive and don't learn to be creative or play well with their peers.

I for one can hardly imagine having to give up my computer and Internet access. I use it for so much. Writing significant amounts with pen and paper has become a tiring chore. It's much easier to pull up MS Word. And that's not necessarily a good thing. There are some things that I still prefer in paper, like books. Some people have encouraged me to purchase a Kindle, and the idea of being able to carry my library in my purse sounds great, but there's something I love about a physical book in my hands I'm not ready to let go of.

I definitely appreciated the mention in the article about critical thinking skills. Sitting in history class memorizing dates, events, and significant individuals or people groups is of no use if the student fails to understand why those events happened, what the effects were, why people were significant, what caused them to have the impact they did, how it affects our world today, and so forth. Knowledge is worthless if we don't learn how to think deeper.

I almost find the last point amusing. A few years ago, I couldn't understand some of the changes happening in our local elementary schools and I still don't like it. Classes that were normally an hour now turned into random lengths like 33 minutes for example. (These are just my rough estimations.) Reading a student's schedule was almost ridiculous with times like recess at 10:12 and lunch at 11:27.

I'm sure one of the reasons they made these changes was because they believed children learned better a little at a time. I wonder though how at Grade 8 student's half hour class will prepare them for regular 75 minute classes in high school. Yes, attention spans are getting shorter as the number of distractions in people's lives increase, but how long can you accommodate them? Even churches cut the time of their sermons because hardly anyone can sit and listen to a speaker for an hour without getting restless and impatient. I know because I tend to be one of them! But that speaker shouldn't cut the time for me. I should just learn to focus and give them my attention.

Our society is seeing many changes in education. Some of them may prove to be good, but likely not all of them. The use of technology can be a great tool to enhance a child's learning experience, but it shouldn't be overused. Shorter lessons may allow children to better absorb and process information, but shouldn't be used simply because they have a short attention span and get bored easily. If the education system lacks balance, children will not learn to apply themselves and our generation will be no more intelligent than the last.

Careers and Personal Life

2011-08-15T21:06:00.001-04:00

I don't know a whole lot about politics or American history, but you don't have to in order to know there's always rivalries. I usually don't pay much attention to it. I have no interest in listening to politicians bicker and insult each other. But 10 Best Political Rivalries in American History did catch my attention.

In several cases, the individuals who were at odds with each other in the political arena had personal problems with each other first. Burr and Hamilton hated each other and it ended violently. Such was also the case with Brooks and Sumner.

The problems between VP Richard Nixon and Senator John F. Kennedy were also personal, but on a different level. Nixon's sense of insecurity and inferiority caused him problems in the political arena. Sure, he had all the credentials, but he came from a poor family whereas he viewed Kennedy as a privileged rich boy. He didn't think he measured up. Later as president, he had to work to expose the grime in possible opponent Senator Ted Kennedy's life in the 1972 election. His negative self image affected his political career, causing conflict that may not have been necessary.

What I mostly see in this article is that your personal life and career will always affect each other to some degree. Politicians who couldn't get along with one another personally couldn't work well together and even caused them to turn to violence. The way you grow up, view yourself and view others will affect your confidence in your work. If you don't think you can make yourself look good to the public, you have to try to make someone else look bad to give yourself chance.

As much as some people would like to make a clear distinction between work and personal life, you just can't. They'll always be at least somewhat connected. If you lack honesty and integrity at home or in your social life, chances are you may at work as well. If you have problems at work, you'll bring them home with you. They can never be entirely separated. And don't think you leave your problems behind when you walk out the door. They will follow you.

Mikeschair - Someone Worth Dying For

2011-08-06T16:07:00.000-04:00

I leave for a vacation next week, but this is what I leave you with in the meantime.

The Kids' Social Club

2011-07-31T15:36:00.001-04:00

Have you ever listened to or been part of a conversation where a parent has been considering homeschooling? Concerned individuals of the motion usually aren't concerned about the quality of education the child will receive, although whether their education will later be valid is a good concern that will come up. The most common question is this: How will your kids learn to socialize?

I tire of hearing this lame question. Since when is school about socializing? Unfortunately that's become a very important, if not the most important aspect in today's system, but it shouldn't be. There are many reasons why parents choose to homeschool, but shouldn't the quality of their education be a primary concern, rather than their social life?

I personally spent 11 mostly miserable years in the public school system and spent two years at home studying through an individual study program. For the most part, I don't have a lot of good school memories. Yes, I liked learning and my grades were good, but I was always struggling to fit in. I often felt like I was near the bottom of the pecking order and many days I just wanted to play sick. Being smart didn't help either. Unless you're popular, you're better off being a loser and sitting in the principal's office every week than being a "teacher's pet." I was more than happy to leave when I did.

How will they learn to socialize? How do children learn to socialize in public schools? They learn to form cliques, to shun others, to bite, chew, tear down, and drive the outsiders to depression and thoughts of suicide. Oh yes, the students listen to countless anti-bullying speeches, but they often seemed pretty fruitless. Kids learn to stay in touch with the latest trends in our culture, to discover and experiment with drugs, talk dirty and how to have "safe sex" or not so safe. Is that really how you want them to learn to socialize?

The funny this is, as many homeschooled friends as I have, I can't say any of them are anti-social or ill-mannered. Many of them are much more socially competent than the high school students I knew. I'm sure there's plenty of bad homeschooled examples. The fault lies not in the method, but in the parents. It's up to the parents to teach their children how to socialize and conduct themselves in public. By getting them involved in church activities, homeschool groups, sports teams, other extracurricular activities and spending time with other young families, they'll get plenty of time with kids their own age. They don't need a school.

I like how Oliver DeMille examines this issue in A Thomas Jefferson Education. Although it's not a book about homeschooling, it definitely favours the method over what he calls the conveyor belt method, if done properly. And according to DeMille, socialization is a lot more than what children are learning in schools. "The highest level of socialization, the ideal, means the ability to effectively work with people of all backgrounds, stations, and positions, of really caring for them and being able to build and maintain long term, nurturing relationships."

After 11 years on the belt, I never learned to do that. Let's face it. The kids' social club doesn't produce good social skills. Stop giving me that lame objection. You'll have to come up with something else. And judging from how many of conversations I've heard, I already have a good idea what it is. I don't want to hear it anymore.

Let's Not Talk About That

2011-07-27T15:01:00.002-04:00

Have you ever been in a Christian meeting or study where the leader has asked if anyone has input or questions and the silence is so thick you're afraid to breathe? It's hard to believe after what you've just heard nobody has anything to say. Were they even listening?

They're all doing the same thing you are. Listening to their heart pound as they turn around that one thought they wouldn't dare ever say out loud. Everybody's afraid. Scared about what other people will think. Embarrassed. Ashamed.

I've noticed something as of late. I've read or looked at books and endless resources for Christian youth and singles and there are certain issues that are evidently big problems within the church, but I have rarely, if ever, heard them spoken of in person, face to face. Why is this?

One thing I do know is that we are all humans born with very much the same tendencies. No problems are new, unique, or limited to certain groups of people. But there are certain things we shrink away from, avoid and simply hope for the best.

We all know these problems exist in the world and in the church, but we don't talk about them. Do we simply hope that our teens or youth don't have problems with these things? Do we think that our church or group is better than all the rest? Are we afraid simply because it's uncomfortable and you might have to say words you nearly blush to think about? Why do we stay quiet about certain issues?

All people, not just young people, have questions about a whole host of subjects but everyone's afraid. Afraid to stand out. Afraid of what people think. Afraid of being vulnerable. Afraid of what would happen if anyone knew. So we protect our questions and secrets, bind them up with chains of steel and ache alone.

I love Tenth Avenue North's song Healing Begins. But it also often makes me uncomfortable because it's so true and frightening. In this video journal of the song, lead singer Mike Donehey talks about how confessing something to God is easy, but having to tell someone else freaks us out. People scare us a lot more than God does.

The truth is though, keeping things quiet doesn't fix anything. Knowing something you're doing is wrong doesn't fix anything. It's only when you start talking about downright scary stuff though that people can find freedom and healing. And nobody's ready for that.

Christians and Secular Books

2011-07-19T10:35:00.000-04:00

Charles Finny once said "I cannot believe that a person who has ever known the love of God can relish a secular novel" and denounced many great writers. I'm sure many Christians, past and present, share this view. Charles Colson, however, provides and excellent response to that statement in his book The One Year Devotions for People of Purpose.

Many writers of secular books weave profound Christian themes into their works, and interestingly enough, these works have brought people to Christ when the Bible didn't. This was the case with Louise Cowan, coauthor of Invitation to the Classics. After reading numerous theological works and the Bible, she did not return to the faith. It was eventually the works of Shakespeare and The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoyevsky that allowed her to see the truth of the Gospel. Colson shares another story of a Russian girl who was converted by reading literature when she was not allowed to read the Bible.

Is it possible that we as Christians have put God in a box, thinking that he only speaks through His Word and His children? Although this is very often the case, by the above stories we can also see that God works way outside of that. He can reach the lost through the work of unbelievers, who may not have intended to bring glory to Him whatsoever. I have found no indication that Dostoyevsky was a Christian, (although he may have been) and God used him to bring souls to Himself.

There is power in story. I have often found that novels can teach me just as much as a book out of the Spiritual Growth section. Jesus Himself often used parables to teach people spiritual ideas. Louise Cowan explained how literature brought her to where she is. "Not until a literary work of art awakened my imaginative faculties could the possibility of a larger context and reason alone engage my mind. . . . I had to be transformed in the way that literature transforms--by story, image, symbol--before I could see the simple truths of the Gospel."

Don't underestimate the power of story and literary works. They can teach us much about our world and lead others to their Creator.

You're a Genius!

2011-07-15T20:36:00.001-04:00

"Greatness isn't the work of a few geniuses, it is the purpose of each of us. It is why we were born. Every person you have ever met is a genius. Every one. Some of us have chosen not to develop it, but it is there. It is in us. All of us. It is in your spouse. It is in each of your children. You live in a world of geniuses. How can we settle for anything less than the best education? How can we tell our children that mediocre education will do, when greatness is available?" --Oliver DeMille, A Thomas Jefferson Education

A New Focus

2011-07-09T14:10:00.000-04:00

Yes, I have a new look and a new title! It's crazy, I know. I've been thinking of making a change for awhile. I might still play around with the look yet. What I wanted was to change my title to better describe the content and focus of this blog. I would have changed the URL, but wanted my readers to still be able to find me. Why "Desiring Something Greater"? What is "something greater"? I don't know exactly. That's what I'm setting out to find out.

What I do know is that we live in a world satisfied with mediocrity while there is a lot more to be had. When I say I desire something greater, I'm not talking about the world's definition of great, or even that of many Christians. I'm not talking about any career, degree, salary or social position. I'm talking about seeking and living out God's purpose for my life. He has a great plan for my life, if I yield to it and sacrifice my own plans. I have desires that others may scoff at, but I believe God has placed them within me.

My biggest fear about this change is that I won't live up to what I write about or what people expect to see in my life. When I say I desire or seek something greater, I don't claim to know what greatness is, to be great, and I can't even promise that I will one day achieve what I'm after. I am reminded of Phillippians 3:12 where Paul says "Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ has made me his own." (ESV) My desire is simply that I will not settle for what I have or this world's expectations for my life, but to strive after a fulfilled life, even if that means nothing more than living a content and simple life that blesses others.

Some people may look down at my lack of goals or long-term plans. To those I say I have been unsuccessful in planning my life thus far. I can't even see a single day transpire the way I plan it. It's in those times I'm reminded my life is not my own and I'm not in charge.

I have no idea where this blog will go from here or whether this new direction will even be successful. I will continue to share my thoughts on life, God, books, writing and whatever else I discover. I believe there's a lot of beauty to discover and much to learn from writers of the past and I intend to make the study of their works a part of my life. It's what continues to inspire me, something I truly get excited over. I don't want to shy away from difficult questions but to face them boldly and wrestle with them even if I never receive solid answers. The apostle Paul told us to be mature in our thinking (1 Cor. 14:20) and to think on whatever is true, honourable, just, pure, lovely, commendable, excellent and worthy of praise (Phil. 4:8). This is what I desire to do.

If I never do anything significant with my life, if I never make an notable difference, it will not be for lack of desire. It will only be because I allowed giants of fear, failure and unbelief rule over me. This is my stand against them.

Jane Eyre: Turning the Bent of Nature

2011-07-03T16:38:00.003-04:00

"It is hard work to control the working of inclination, and turn the bent of nature: but that it may be done, I know from experience. God has given us, in a measure, the power to make our own fate; and when out energies seem to demand a sustenance they cannot get--when our will strains after a path we may not follow--we need neither starve from inanition, nor stand still in despair: we have but to seek another nourishment for the mind, as strong as the forbidden food it longed to taste--and perhaps purer; and to hew out for the adventurous foot a road as direct and broad as the one Fortune has blocked up against us, if rougher than it." --St. John Rivers, Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte

What Do You Want to Be When You Grow Up?

2011-06-30T10:37:00.004-04:00

If you're anywhere between 0 and 20, you've heard the question far too many times. What do you want to be when you grow up? If you're anything like me, the answer to that question has changed too many times to count and now that you're supposed to be actively pursuing your dream, you just don't know anymore. When you graduate from high school, the immediate question is "What are you going to do now?" People expect you to know. But sometimes you just don't.

Accredited Online College posted an article on their blog called 30 Thriving Careers Your Children Should Consider. It's a great list to check out if you want career ideas. When I first saw it, I was expecting a typical list and I wasn't impressed when the first career listed was Delivery Service Driver. Your child is trying to figure life out and the best thing you can suggest is that they work for UPS? I was, however, quite pleased by the end of the article.

I took note of a few things while reading through the list. I was surprised by the variety of careers listed and levels of education required to pursue them. I also noticed that a large number of careers listed related to healthcare, science and genetics. It's an informed list that takes into account our rapidly changing world and the demands that will come with new developments and technology.

Some people may wonder how you can put a FedEx driver and construction worker in the same list as a stem cell researcher or geochemist. The first two require very little education whereas the last two would require university degrees. As advanced as our world is, there's still need for the lower jobs and the article explains that. With the increase in online ordering, there's an increasing need for courier service to deliver products. And while everyone else is busy making new discoveries and speeding up the pace of our world, we still need people to make it function.

I'd also like point out something else. Many students have no desire to continue their education once they're finished high school and I don't think they should be pressured to. Yes, with a degree they would have increased opportunities and they might get paid more, but some teenagers may just not care. A post-secondary education is wonderful if an individual has a clear sense of direction or goal. However, many colleges and universities are filled with aimless young adults who don't want to be there, and four years and thousands of dollars later, they are no closer to knowing what they want or getting where they want to go. The above career list makes room for individuals who simply want a job and caters to a variety of interests and personalities.

A big thing this list tells me is that our world isn't getting any healthier, not the people or the environment. Doctors will never run out of work. Disease is constantly increasing and researches are trying to find cures to the countless attacks that waste the human body. Environmentalists are trying to save our planet and control the issues that are causing health problems. It almost seems that a lot of these careers are focused simply on preservation and the desperate attempt to prevent further decay in our world.

Last of all, this article was informed. It didn't simply focus on present needs but considered future needs as well. It focused on growing fields where the demand for workers would be increasing. It explained how careers in areas like debt counseling could be successful in difficult economic times. The writer didn't simply pull random ideas out of the air and make it sound good.

I'd like to thank Accredited Online Colleges for pointing me to this article. Even if you're not interested in their college programs, their blog has some great articles to look through and explore. I'm looking forward to reading more.

What's the Point?

2011-06-22T20:40:00.003-04:00

In this post, I will attempt to answer a question I have been struggling with for some time and I shared with someone last week. "One of my desires for my time now is to study classics and great literature, to study on my own, and to learn how to think. Is there any real profit in that? I would love to study through a university, but don't have the time or finances now and I'm not sure if it would even prepare me to do something meaningful. Is it just a selfish ambition or will it be something that I can actually some day use to make a difference. Is it okay or is it not?"

This desire was birthed in me a year and a half ago when I read A Thomas Jefferson Education by Oliver DeMille. Since then, I unfortunately haven't had the time I would like to devote to that ambition and I have begun to wonder if there's even a point. Would it result in me doing anything meaningful? Shouldn't I rather be active in feeding the poor, helping orphans, or freeing slaves? Is it a God-honouring desire or is it a mere waste of time on temporary things?

No. No, it's not a waste of time. I owe that conclusion to the wisdom of many individuals. I have read many articles on the issues of reading and education, received encouragement from friends, and have concluded that learning is a worthwhile pursuit. I appreciated the articles Alex and Brett Harris posted over at the Rebelution on John Piper's book Think, which I definitely intend to read. In their two posts on the book, they discuss the importance and benefit of reading and thinking hard things.

I was blessed awhile ago by what a young man shared with me. It was the idea that you can only teach your children what you know. Even if your ambition is to be a mother, you will only be able to pass on to them what you already know. He suggested that the parts of education that we don't "use" but that we remember are the ones that build us up the most.

I have also considered a few other ideas in reaching my conclusion. Classics or the great books are often referred to as the Western canon. These are the writings that have been most influential in shaping Western culture. Among them are works that have endured for hundreds, some over a thousand years. Think about that for a minute. There are people in our day who devote themselves to studying what people wrote hundreds of years ago. If their writings have been so influential and endured for so long that students in universities still study them today, I think I might to know what they had to say!

One of my desires has been to be a writer. In order to write well, you must first be able to read and think well. This can be achieved by reading literature. Also, a lot of what I write now is a result of reading. It has given my writing greater purpose. Thus, the reading and study of classics is helping me to hone my writing skills and brings me closer to achieving my goals.

I recently wrote a number of posts on Jane Eyre, a classic work of fiction. Through my study of the book, I have thought through some difficult issues. Classics often build moral character and offers excellent words of wisdom pertaining to various areas of life. They challenge the way we think and cause us to evaluate what we believe. These are just a few benefits.

I don't know where this desire will go. I don't know if I will ever have the opportunity to study and discuss these works at a college. But I intend to say no to ignorance and to learn what I can where I am. The resources available to me are numerous. And I think I can stop exploring. There's enough books I want to read to keep me busy for a lifetime.

Life Without Limits Review

2011-06-14T08:48:00.002-04:00

"Nick Vujicic is a man who has been a
great source of inspiration to me through
his videos so I was really excited when
he published his first book Life Without
Limits: Inspiration for a Ridiculously
Good Life. He certainly did not disappoint.
Nick was born in Australia in 1982
without arms and legs and his parents
were given no warning or any medical
explanation. He has overcome countless
challenges in life. Today, he’s a motivational
speaker and evangelist sharing
God’s love and hope with the world."

Read the rest of my review at Lighted Lamp Magazine.

Serving After the Resurrection

2011-06-06T10:46:00.004-04:00

I just finished reading through the Gospel of John and I couldn't help but be intrigued by Chapter 21. It recounts the last appearance Jesus makes to his disciples in that gospel. Seven of them have gone out fishing. They're out all night and have no luck. At dawn Jesus is standing on the shore and tells them to cast their nets on the other side and they don't only bring in the BIG ONE, they had so many they couldn't even haul the net in.

Now, there's a couple interesting things to note. When Jesus appeared to His disciples after His resurrection, they didn't recognize him, but they later always knew it was him without having to ask. Also, when Peter saw that it was Jesus, he put on his outer garment since he was naked and jumped into the water. Why he jumped in, I'm not sure, but he definitely wasn't going to have Jesus see him in his work clothes, or lack thereof. To me I think I see his sudden modesty as a sign of respect. Although the disciples brought in such a large quantity of fish the net was not torn and they took special note to count and record the number: 153 large fish.

Anyhow, the disciples come to shore to discover that Christ has made a coal fire and prepared fish and bread. While the men were out all night fishing and not catching anything, Jesus was making breakfast for them, although I think I would consider it more like supper. By what we read in the gospels, Jesus liked fish and bread and it seems like it was a staple in the diet of these people.

The fish and bread here isn't really the important thing. What I see as significant is that Jesus didn't just appear to them to see how they were still coming along. He came to them serving. He knew they had been out all night and hadn't caught any fish, so He told them how to get some. They also must have been hungry, so he prepared food for them. Jesus spent all his time in ministry serving other people, but it didn't stop after the resurrection. He was still meeting the needs of the people he loved.

I also believe Jesus didn't stop serving when He ascended. We know that He's sitting at the right hand of the Father and he lives to make intercession for us. He still continues to serve us. We pray; He answers. He still meets our needs. He's never stopped serving us. Isn't that amazing?

We often speak about serving the Lord and that's still true. But I think He still continues to serve us a lot more.

What You Gain Here Stays Here

2011-05-29T12:45:00.004-04:00

We can't take anything with us when we die. You've probably heard it way too many times. But has it become a reality to you?

I was at my bank last week looking into some savings options and as I'm trying to understand everything being explained to me, the lady suddenly asks, "If you die and go to heaven, who do you want all your money to go to?" I was taken back to say the least. That question didn't sit well with me and I it certainly wasn't something I wanted to answer. But I had to. I had to decide who I wanted to have my money when I died. I hated doing that.

Now, I know life is short. I've been reminded of that again this past month. I'm not guaranteed a long life, but I live like I am. I plan, I think, I save. But the truth is, when I die, everything I have accumulated in my lifetime I'll leave behind. What I gain here stays here.

I've been studying Ecclesiastes with some girls and this is one of the topics that came up.

Ecclesiastes 2: 18-21 (ESV)
I hated all my toil in which I toil under the sun, seeing that I must leave it to the man who will come after me, and who knows whether he will be wise or a fool? Yet he will be master of all for which I toiled and used my wisdom under the sun. This also is vanity. So I turned about and gave my heart up to despair over all the toil of my labors under the sun, because sometimes a person who has toiled with wisdom and knowledge and skill must leave everything to be enjoyed by someone who did not toil for it.

Basically, when we leave this world, everything we own and worked for goes to somebody who didn't work for it. And on top of that, you have no idea what they're going to do with it. How fair is that? But how does that affect the way we live? I don't go to work thinking my money's going to go to someone else. That's not the plan. But one day, it will.

Keeping this in mind, how does it can change the way you live? Because what you gain here, you have to leave here.

For Such Moments as This

2011-05-15T16:04:00.002-04:00

"I will keep the law given by God; sanctioned by man. I will hold to the principles received by me when I was sane, and not mad--as I am now. Laws and principles are not for times when there is no temptation: they are for such moments as this, when body and soul rise in mutiny against their rigour; stringent are they; inviolate they shall be. If at my individual convenience I might break them, what would be their worth? They have a worth--so I have always believed; and if I cannot believe it now, it is because I am insane--quite insane: with my veins running fire, and my heart beating faster than I can count its throbs. Preconceived opinions, foregone determinations, are all I have at this hour to stand by: there I plant my foot." --Jane Eyre (emphasis mine)

Laura Story - Blessings

2011-05-12T11:37:00.001-04:00

In times of loss and grief, life is difficult to understand. God is hard to understand. This song articulates our pain, but it also offers hope. In our trials, we must believe that God has a plan, and a good one at that.

Jane Eyre: Is Love Blind?

2011-05-09T10:09:00.003-04:00

Love is blind. It' a common phrase. Is it true?

I did a little research on the phrase and found that it was first coined by Shakespeare. He used it in a few of his plays. The idea is that when a person falls in love, they become blind to the other person's faults. Emotions take over and they fail to see clearly. A research study has actually proven this to be true. The activity in areas of the brain that control critical thought are actually suppressed by love.

Some people think that before you get married, you should keep both eyes wide open and when you marry, keep one eye shut. That might not be such a bad idea.

This is one of the latest issues I've been thinking about in my study of Jane Eyre. When Jane first comes to Thornfield, she definitely takes notice of Rochester's faults, which in my opinion are many. He's honest with her that he has a past he regrets, although he normally doesn't explain them. And on top of that, Jane doesn't find him particularly attractive.

However, as the story progresses, her interest in the man, 20 years older than herself, grows. Interest turns to affection, and affection turns to love. By this time, she completely overlooks any of the faults she previously saw in him. Criticism has fled and love wins. Even when faced with the competition of another woman, Jane doesn't let it faze her. She's more in love with the man than ever. She's consumed by this and quickly begins to idolize the man.

The problem with Rochester is that he's a mysterious man and has a tendency to be deceptive. The reader can see the problem easily, but Jane is blinded to it. She disregards any questionable actions, motives or intentions. When Rochester proposes, she questions how long his love for her will last. He makes it clear that once they're married, she will be all his, attached to him like his watch and chain. He's going to control her. His flowery words and affection often quickly turn to rudeness. This still doesn't bother Jane. She seems to prefer insults to affection. It's almost as if she doesn't want to be or doesn't think she deserves to be properly loved.

Will her eyes be opened before she gets burned? You'll have to read the book for yourself to find out.

Calling All Fiction Lovers

2011-05-04T10:27:00.003-04:00

Lately, I've had little time for reading or writing, and thus the content of my blog has been lacking. But, that doesn't mean I'm not discovering new things, books, sites, blogs, etc. I discover way more than I can keep up with. I know of enough to keep me busy for a lifetime.

One of the recent sites I've gotten excited about is Speculative Faith. It's a site for writers and readers who love Christian visionary fiction. There's new articles every day covering a host of subjects. I first discovered it through a link posted on Facebook by author Rachel Starr Thomson, author of the Seventh World Trilogy (which is really good by the way), among other things. She's just finished writing a review on Speculative Faith on the latest book in The Auralia Thread series by Jeffrey Overstreet, which I'm looking forward to reading.

I haven't had time to read articles on this site every day, but I love what I have found. It definitely caters to my interest in the fantasy genre. There's been reviews, discussions of the criticism Christian fiction receives, dialogues, interviews, discussions on entertainment or whether you or not you have to be "called" to write and a whole lot more I haven't read. On the top of the home page, there's always inspiring quotes by various writers. There's an author bio section where you can learn more about the writers. There's a lot on the sidebar, and one of my favourites there is the list of Recommended Authors.

I love that list because it allows you to browse new authors and link to their sites. I've worked in the book industry for over two years now, and although I'm familiar with a lot, there's a lot more I'm not familiar with. I've read books by several of the authors in that list including Chuck Black, L.B. Graham and Karen Hancock. I'm also familiar with/heard good things about half of the rest of the list and look forward to exploring a lot of those writers.

People may wonder at my choice of fiction. This may sound weird, since I work in the industry, but there's so much out there I have no clue about. I don't read Amish fiction and have never read a single Karen Kingsbury book, although there are titles I want to read by her. For some reason I reach for the fantasy genre, historical fiction or classics.

Speculative fiction carries you into a whole new mystical world, filled with noble men and women, unearthly creatures, and battles between good and evil. It's altogether exhilarating. A lot of what I have read has also had deep spiritual content weaved into the story, that have taught me great lessons and caused me to truly examine my spiritual life. Very often, they have led me to God's throne in prayer.

If you want a change in your reading, try some speculative fiction. Experience something new. Browse the site and be inspired to read and think. Happy reading!

An Involuntary Confidant

2011-04-27T18:35:00.002-04:00

"Know, that in the course of your future life you will often find yourself elected the involuntary confidant of your acquaintances' secrets: people will instinctively find out, as I have done, that it is not your forte to talk of yourself, but to listen while others talk about themselves; they will feel, too, that you listen with no malevolent scorn of their indiscretion but with a kind of innate sympathy; not the less comforting and encouraging because it is very unobtrusive in its manifestations." --Jane Eyre

Mr. Rochester says this to Jane in a conversation shortly after meeting. I loved this chapter. I learned so much about both characters and there's a lot of things to think about!

Serving the Church

2011-04-20T14:35:00.001-04:00

"It’s nice being a pew warmer. You can just
show up to church Sunday morning, even a few
minutes late if you’re dragging your feet, take
your seat in the crowd, listen to the sermon,
sing some songs, and go home to your lunch
without a second thought. It’s quite convenient
when you can just sit back, be blessed, and let
everyone else do the work. And that’s precisely
what millions of Christians do."

Read the rest of my article at Lighted Lamp here.

Jane Eyre: Discipline

2011-04-18T15:03:00.006-04:00

I have now finally completed Volume 1 of Jane Eyre. This post will focus around Chapter 6, and I would encourage you to read it if you have the book. It contains one of my favourite and most thought-provoking conversations of the book so far. It's also an important continuation of my last post on authority.

In this chapter, we learn a bit more of Jane first friend she makes at Lowood, the school she's been sent to. Her name is Helen Burns, probably about four years older than Jane (making her 14) and her character is very different from Jane's. Whereas Jane is proud, bitter and resists authority, Helen is humble, willfully acknowledges her faults and submits herself authority and discipline.

Discipline is largely the issue discussed in this chapter. Early on, Helen is flogged with a bunch of twigs for her behaviour that her teacher, Miss Scatcherd dislikes. Jane believes that Helen should never submit herself to such harsh treatment. She believes it's cruel and would resist it. Helen disagrees. She believes the teacher is simply severe and dislikes her faults.

Helen says "it is weak and silly to say you cannot bear what it is your fate to be required to bear." Of course, Jane really has to wonder at her response and endurance and although she disagrees with her stance, she thinks the girl may be right. "Still I felt that Helen Burns considered things by a light invisible to my eyes. I suspected she might be right and I wrong; but I would not ponder the matter deeply: like Felix, I put it off to a more convenient season."

Although Helen is honest about her own faults, she will not say anything negative about Miss Scatcherd. She takes responsibility for her own actions. The discussion turns to another teacher, Miss Temple, who is loving, gently tells Helen her faults and showers her with praise. Although Jane thinks this approach is better, Helen says that it's not effective. It doesn't cure her faults and even her praise doesn't motivate her to be good. Although Jane thinks Helen is good with Miss Temple, she says she's good in a passive way. She makes no effort and doesn't believe there to be any merit in such goodness.

This comparison of discipline methods reminded me of parents and God. I'm not going to determine what kind of discipline is right or wrong here. I'm not the person to do that but I will say that discipline can easily turn to abuse, and I have a massive problem with that.

You see in this conversation a harsh method that uses the rod, and a gentle one that uses only a gentle tongue. In this story, it seems that the rod is definitely the more effective method, as the character admits. Although love and gentleness are good, they didn't produce the same results. They may have on the outside, but it didn't come from the heart.

When I read the Bible, I see these two sides of God. I see the one that chastens, pours out His wrath and drives merchants out of the temple with a whip. I also see the one that cares for His creation, loves, gives His Son's life for His children, and gathers little children into His arms. Parents can be the same way. A lot of parents emphasize one over the other. They discipline harshly or are all love and leniency. Both can result in problems and rebellion.

Also, Christians often over-emphasize one attribute of God. They preach a God of wrath who stands by to punish all who sin and cast them into hell, or on the flip-side, they preach a God who's all love and mercy so you can do whatever you want and He'll forgive you, always standing ready with big open arms. Both sides, when overdone, result in bad theology.

The conversation in the book continues and Jane maintains that when we are wronged, we must strike back or wicked people will always have their way. She believes they must be stopped by force and it's all as natural as loving someone who loves you. Helen however explains how Jesus taught us in the New Testament to love our enemies and bless those who curse us. She encourages Jane to read it and make Christ her example.

This is a new idea to Jane, as she's always been threatened with hell for her wrong deeds. Of course she believes it's impossible. Helen wonders at how Jane can describe Mrs. Reed's mistreatment with the finest details and tells Jane that she harbours no such feelings. "Life appears to me too short to be spent in nursing animosity, or registering wrongs." I might also add that few children will respond as Helen does. Not many will tolerate such harsh treatment. Helen continues in speaking of great things about Eternity and forgiveness that even I have a hard time understanding and the discussion ends there.

I think this post balances off my last one a little. I've also realized that by the end of the book, my initial ideas and opinions may change. As the plot develops, characters grow and change, as we see Jane beginning to in this chapter with the help of a friend. Up until this point, the book was a little dreary and depressing, even if very engaging. By the end of this chapter, my heart felt refreshed!

Jane Eyre: Justified?

2011-04-10T14:46:00.005-04:00

Can a child's behaviour be justified by her authority's actions?

Jane Eyre is the story of a woman named Jane Eyre, as the title suggests. The first nine chapters of the book recount her childhood, beginning when she is 10 years old. Orphaned and living with her aunt, she is repeatedly pushed aside, verbally and sometimes physically abused by her aunt and cousins and regarded as less than a servant. She's often locked in a room by herself for long periods of time. By the time she's sent away to school, she has become bitter and resentful towards authority.

Jane expresses her misery early on in the book. "Why was I always suffering, always brow-beaten, always accused, for ever condemned? Why could I never please? Why was it useless to try to win anyone's favour?" On one occasion, she gathers up enough courage to confront her aunt and angrily expresses her feelings. After the argument, she feels triumphant, but the feeling quickly fades into deep remorse.

It's sad when a child, because of mistreatment, has grown so angry and resentful. Jane has come to believe that she must resist authority and instill fear in them. The question is this: is she justified? Is her behaviour justified by her authority's actions.

Now, before anything else is said, I must say that the way the book is written, we are made to pity Jane right from chapter one. As she recounts her experiences and mistreatment, we regard her more and more as a victim. The story stirs the reader emotionally, tugs at their heart, as they compare her life with their own personal experiences. To suggest that she's in the wrong doesn't seem fair and we quickly try to justify her attitude and behaviour. Naturally, we sympathize with the character and thus will respond to the situation with more tenderness.

The Bible is pretty clear on this. Although Jane is in the care of a benefactress, I think the words apply just the same.

Ephesians 6:1-3 (ESV)
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother" (this is the first commandment with promise), "that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land."

Christians love to preach this and it would all be good and well if every child lived in a loving Christian home (which they don't). Some, however, conveniently overlook the next verse that says "Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (ESV) Also, Colossians 3:21 says "Father, provoke not your children to anger, lest they be discouraged" (KJV)

I looked up that last word "anger" in the Greek (Strong's Exhaustive Concordance) and found some strong words: "violent passion, (ire or [justifiable] abhorrence); by implication punishment:-- anger, indignation, vengeance, wrath."

We live in a society where child and teenage rebellion is prevalent and we're quick to blame the kids. But who's problem or fault is it really? In many cases, if you were to look beyond the child, you would find a dysfunctional home, void of proper love, care and instruction.

This is largely the case in Jane's situation. She isn't loved or made a part of the family. She's verbally abused, pushed aside, tormented by her cousins, etc. She's scolded when she does something wrong and harassed with the threat of hell for her deeds. It seems to me she's always being reprimanded for what she does wrong but nobody ever takes the time to teach her proper behaviour. Can she really be blamed for her misdeeds?

You can't vigorously shake a bottle of pop, often the cap and expect nothing to happen. The same goes for a child. If they are constantly mistreated and never loved, at some point they're going to react. All their feelings are eventually going to boil over and it's not going to be peachy when they do. Ultimately, it's the responsibility of the parent/guardian to demonstrate love and provide instruction to the children entrusted to their care. If they fail to that, bitterness and rebellion will ensue.

So is Jane justified? Perhaps. I'm not here to draw solid conclusions. No, her response isn't right, but it's what will naturally occur in her situation. The authority has the ultimate responsibility, and in this case, her aunt wasn't fulfilling hers. Jane's conscience convicted her so she knew what she did was wrong and I suppose this would make her responsible for her actions. She learned from venting her emotions that had been building for years. It was the only thing she knew to do. Also, people have been trying to blame their sins on others since the Garden of Eden, and God doesn't buy it.

Having considered some different sides I'm not sure if I can confidently say Yes or No, but here's my conclusion of the matter. Let's just stop blaming the kids all the time!

Jane Eyre: Introduction

2011-04-07T10:46:00.005-04:00

Today I'm introducing a new series I'll be writing for the next few weeks. I'm not sure how many posts it will be, how often I will share on it, and how many other posts will be placed in between. I did however want to start off with this post to just introduce it and let you know where I'm coming from.

About a year and a half ago when I was almost finished school, I read A Thomas Jefferson Education by Oliver DeMille, which I would recommend to students and parents alike. It's an awesome book authored by the founder of George Wythe University and it's all about teaching a new generation of leaders. It's faith based, compares public, home and private education, and focuses on teaching children through mentoring and the classics. It's about teaching children not what to think, but how to think. This is the book that inspired me to read and study classics.

Right now, I'm studying Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte. It's going much slower than I had hoped with all the different things I have going on right now, and I'm not quite half through, but it has already made me think deeply about so many different things. This series will be a discussion of my thoughts. I don't know how it will go or what kind of feedback I will get, but I want to encourage you to study and to think.

I'm also planning on approaching this in a way that may be unpopular and I want to explain why that is. Although the first few topics I will be discussing are faith-based, I don't want to look at them from a strictly Christian/Biblical perspective, although I will do that. I want to consider human reasoning as well. I want to consider matters from different perspectives. Why is this?

I think very often as Christians, when asked what we believe about something start off with something like "Well, the Bible says. . . ." I'm not necessarily saying this approach is wrong, but sometimes what the Bible says is not actually what we believe, or want to believe. We may believe that what the Bible says is right and true, but we don't necessarily like it. We wish it were different. We are humans and by nature we don't always agree with or want what is right and true, although we should. Also, when you enter into discussions with unbelievers, "The Bible says. . ." isn't going to cut it because they don't believe in it. You have to convince them of your reasoning otherwise.

As I've been thinking through the issues of Jane Eyre, I have been reminded what God's Word has to say about things. But in my heart, I want it to be different. I want to believe that a child's bitterness and resentment is justified by her pain and unfair treatment. And in some ways, I believe I can look at scripture and rightly do that. In some ways I can't.

I haven't embarked on this study to believe, think, or feel all the right things. I have embarked on this journey to learn how to think, to form my own opinions and ideas, to look at life from a different perspective, and perhaps to draw some conclusions, although I don't think I will reach many.

I invite you to join in the discussion, or to begin your own journey into the classics. What I will be sharing on here will likely be general discussions that people can understand without having read the book. I'll avoid giving away major plot details, especially later on, although I have no idea how far I'll go. Also, I haven't watched the new movie or trailer. I want to read and appreciate the book for what it is first. If you join the discussion, please don't give away any details.

Why I Don't Have a Cell Phone

2011-04-03T15:16:00.005-04:00

"You mean, you're a teenager and you don't have a cell phone?"

This is kind of the typical response when people find out I'm phoneless. After all, I'm a young woman living in the 21st century? Why wouldn't I have a phone? That's just really weird.

In a way, I kind of take pride in this fact. I must admit that there have been times when I've been really tempted to get one. But I think of it in a "Go big or go home" sort of way. If I get a phone, I'd like a smart phone, because they're the cool thing to have. When my friends are all getting the latest iPhones and Blackberries, getting a cheap phone would be nothing to brag about. Kind of embarrassing if anything.

As you may have guessed already, one of the reasons I don't have a phone is the money. First buying a phone and then adding a monthly bill is not what I need. Right now, I don't think I have very much use for one, although I'm sure I would when I had it. Sometimes the convenience would be more than nice, but that doesn't happen often enough to really make it worth it. Besides, people can get a hold of me most of the time through email, facebook, home phone, work phone, etc. If it's really important, they'll figure out a way.

One of the biggest reasons I don't have a phone is because I don't need another distraction. My computer/Internet is a big enough one. If I don't have Internet access for a few hours, it's like I'm gonna die or something. I need my connection. And because of this addiction, I've also been taking a break from facebook and music for a bit. So much of my time is wasted on those two things or decrease my productivity while I'm working. A phone that I would carry with me everywhere would no doubt make it worse.

Also, when people have cell phones, they can be very annoying in social settings. I don't want to one of them. It can get mildly irritating when you're hanging out or having a conversation and half the people around you are busy on their phones, texting, web browsing and the like. They tune out of what's going on around them and instead of actually spending time together, most people are absorbed in doing their own thing. It's bad social etiquette and disrespectful.

There you have it. A few reasons why I'm a cell phone free teenager and proud of it!

Coffee Shops

2011-03-30T15:10:00.002-04:00

I enjoy my coffee, especially mid-afternoon with a nice sweet snack. I'm enjoying a cup as we speak with a chocolate bar. Right after a work out. It's all about balance. :)

Coffee is a huge part of culture in Canada. It's plain by coffee shops called "Coffee Culture" and the numerous Tim Hortons locations found in almost every town and city. People need their daily dose of caffeine. It seems Starbucks in huge in the US, but here it seems Timmies rules. The closest Starbucks is like 45 minutes away, and thus I've only visited once.

Having said that, I must say I don't visit coffee shops very frequently. Usually no more than once a week, and then it's normally a Tim Hortons. I also don't go for the specialty coffees either cause I can hardly justify paying $4 or $5 for a drink. It can run a lot of money out of your pocket, a little bit at a time. I used to work in a coffee shop and it's actually kind of sad how much money people can come in and spend in a day on coffee. Somehow it has become a very acceptable addiction and people rarely speak of the money spent on it.

I do like visiting different places on occasion though. There is a new small one that opened up in our town last year called The Perc and I've been there a couple times. I wish I went there more often simply to support the good cause. What's so special about it? For one, they sell organic fair trade coffee, so I can thereby support smaller coffee growers who need the money more than the big guys. Places like Tim Hortons will not disclose where they get their beans. Also, this coffee shop offers employment opportunities to youth who are facing employment challenges. They even use 100% compostable cups, so it's even environmentally friendly (if you do compost them.) Their coffee is good and I can drink it feeling like I'm supporting a good cause. These kinds of small businesses need more public support than they get.

Last week, I visited Cravings and I enjoyed that experience as well, which also serves fair trade coffee. They have a great menu of drinks, light lunches, baked goods and chocolates. I could go crazy in there, like a kid in a candy store. The atmosphere is cozy and homey and there's cute giftware displayed for sale. You have to be willing to pay a little more at places like this, and I suppose that's why I don't go to them frequently, but they are nice.

So, if you like coffee, go out of your way if necessary once in awhile to support a smaller place that is actually doing some good. And as for a side note, the first time I visited one of the above places, I was in a hurry, running late for work, very distracted and nearly walked out without paying. If you're considering stealing, I advise you not to try it. Chances are you'll get caught before you get to the door. Embarrassing!

Prayer Journals

2011-03-24T16:02:00.002-04:00

It's been a year now since I started keeping a prayer journal. I used to write down prayer notes in my regular journals when I still did that, but never kept a focused prayer journal. I started it when I read Wrestling Prayer by Eric and Leslie Ludy and in the past year, I've filled many pages.

Why keep a prayer journal? That was my question too. I'm not sure what my reason was when I started, but one thing I like it for is to keep my prayer times focused. Very often when I go to prayer, I forget things and my mind and thoughts wander. Having a detailed list of things to pray about keeps me focused. Keeping a prayer journal also allows you to keep track and go back and see how God has answered.

Something I have avoided doing is sticking to a format. My journal entries vary. Some are just list of things to pray about. Some are cries of pain and my need for God's help. Some are just brief accounts of where I'm at spiritually. I don't journal everyday. Some days I have nothing significant to write down and there's times a couple weeks go by without me pulling it out. But I do try to use it regularly and take time to specifically spend in prayer.

In the past year, I've prayed about many things. Friends, family, my future husband, relationships, church, work, missions, ministry, for those hurting or in need and direction in life. I've prayed for a vision, passion and a purpose. I've prayed about different opportunities. I've prayed to show God's love to those around me. I've prayed for provision and health, in which God has answered in many ways. I've prayed about hindrances in my life and sins God has convicted me of.

I've prayed for God to prepare me to be a godly wife and mother, to be a help meet for the man He will one day bring to me, for a better understanding of what marriage is, and to keep myself pure. I pray for Him to guard over my husband and to prepare him to be the godly leader and provider of our home, to be a man of character with a deep love for God and others, a man who will make a difference. At times, I have sought contentment with tears as I wait on Him.

There's even been times where I've just earnestly prayed for a desire for prayer and the Word. It's okay to be honest with God if you don't feel like praying. We can't come to God unless He draws us. Our desire to pray and read His Word comes from Him. Draw nigh to Him, seek Him, and He will draw nearer. Plead for desire if need be. You don't have to be ashamed.

My journal bears record of a lot of joys and tears, ups and downs. It tells of how God has answered. Sometimes it hasn't been in a way I would have expected or even liked, but I have to trust that He knows best.

Try keeping a prayer journal. You don't need anything fancy. A plain spiral bound notebook will do. That's what I use right now. You don't need a formula. Just write what's on your heart. One day you will go back and be amazed at what God has done.

Radical Review

2011-03-15T13:47:00.003-04:00

"This month, I had the privilege of reading Radical: Taking Back Your Faith From the American Dream by David Platt. I had long heard and read a lot of good things about it and it currently ranks #2 on CBA's best seller list. Although I must say I'm surprised. Radical's message is certainly not a popular one in the church today, but it is a very necessary one and nothing short of biblical."

Read the rest of my review at Lighted Lamp.

Torn Between Desires

2011-03-12T09:54:00.002-05:00

Do you ever feel like you don't know what you want? Do you have multiple desires that you can't have all at the same time or that directly contradict each other? Do you have decisions to make and can't decide what to do?

I'm in that place right now. Actually, I've been here for a long time. But now I feel the even greater pressure of it. I have to make decisions. Big, possibly life-altering decisions. I'm dealing with excitement and massive fears as I consider the possibilities and wonder what will happen.

To an extent, I'm in a season in my life right now that I've long wanted. I have extra time to spend at home, time to read, write, think, study different books, cook, bake, etc. and yet, I'm not quite satisfied. I can't help but wonder if I'm not simply catering to myself, my own wants and desires. Am I not supposed to be using this time, to serve, to give, to sacrifice my own desires for others? Is that not what God has called us too? Was I not created for more than I'm living right now, and deep down, don't I desire that?

Don't get me wrong. I do desire to serve God and other people, to use this time in my life to further His kingdom. But can I do both? Can I really strive to fulfill my own desires and serve God at the same time? As much as I want to and insist there must be a way to make it all work, or a perfect balance, I haven't found it yet. I doubt it exists.

At some point, I have to sacrifice something. As I look at my desires, options and various possibilities for my life, I realize that all of them will require sacrifice somewhere. Whether it's time, finances, job security, or my countless wants and selfish pleasures, at some point, I will have to let go of some or all of those things.

I have to decide what I want and what I will do. But more than that, I have to decide what truly matters in life. I have to decide whether I will follow my own agenda or surrender to whatever plans God has for me and give myself for His cause.

It's not an easy choice. I can't sit on the fence my whole life. I have to decide. You have to decide.

Does It Matter?

2011-03-08T10:51:00.003-05:00

The work we do can often get discouraging. We can't help but wonder every now and then if what we do really matters or makes a difference. Does anybody care? I feel this way frequently about this blog. I spend time thinking and writing, but do people actually read it? Like it? Respond to it? Am I just wasting my time? It's easy to fall into this rut.

But very often when I feel like I'm tired of thinking up things to write about, or feel like it's all useless, I get a comment or message from somebody saying how they enjoy or are blessed by my blog. It matters that somebody cares and that I'm not just talking to the wind.

My blog is largely a place where I try to figure out life. If people want to get to know me better, this is a good place to start. Some of the things I write on here may not be true. Sometimes I'm wrong and that's okay. It's a part of learning and growing. There are things I write about that may not be popular among other people. There's things that both more "conservative Christians" and more "liberal Christians" would disagree with, although I don't quite like putting it in those terms.

The truth is that the things I write will not please everyone. If I had to please everyone, I would have to quit altogether. My desire is to live a life and write in such a way that is pleasing to the Lord, but I'm still prone to mess up a lot. Some people want to hear the truth and some people don't. I was reminded of Proverbs 3:1-4. Although there are scriptures that tell us living a life pleasing to God may bring persecution, verse 4 there tells us that we can also gain favour in the sight of man when we live a life pleasing to the Lord.

The things I do and write do make a difference. I was reminded of that again last week in several ways. I may be young, but people are watching and listening. And for my older readers, my advice is this: there are many people, especially young people who are looking for godly examples or mentor-figures in their lives. Don't be afraid to be one of them. What you write, teach and live out matters. It makes a difference.

It's disappointing when you write an article you're excited about or want feedback on and nobody comments. Now, in saying this, I don't want to make you feel guilty, but I would encourage you to respond to writers or anybody else for that matter. If you like what they have to say, tell them; if you disagree, tell them gently. Remember (and I need to tell myself this a lot more often) to disagree with the idea and not attack the person. Although God's approval is ultimately what matters, we as humans need reassurance from others as well. We need to know that it's making a difference. It's what keeps us going.

If you haven't yet, I would encourage you to read Stirring Up Inspiration. It's an article I did in January where I discuss feelings of inadequacy, fears we face about making our thoughts and feelings known and the influence we have on those around us. I ask questions and suggest ideas that may not be popular among some. Forgive my rambling in the beginning of it if you find it annoying.

I don't know exactly what God would have me accomplish in my life or through my writing, but judging from the feedback I have gotten and the doors it has opened, I do have influence. It may be small, but it certainly doesn't go unnoticed.

Self-Help?

2011-03-02T09:05:00.002-05:00

This morning, my attention was directed to an article by Online Colleges and Universities regarding the self-help industry. I have made mention in previous posts about similar kinds of books, although I think I have generally referred to them as "self-improvement" or "success" books. That's because I don't really like the idea of self-help and try to avoid them. There have been a few exceptions that I enjoyed that contained valuable life lessons, but I wouldn't refer to them as "self-help".

The article was 15 Surprising Facts About the Self-Help Industry. I can't say all of the points surprised me much, especially not the first one. Of course the industry targets women. Of course it makes a lot of money. And yes, although spirituality is always incorporated, it's likely empty and overrun by materialism.

When you think about it, it's amazing how so many people, especially women, will spend so much time and money into the industry. Read the article for yourself and let me know what you think.

Worshiping Elsewhere

2011-02-28T11:18:00.003-05:00

This past weekend, I had the opportunity to join in fellowship with ladies from a different church group. I like visiting other places every once in awhile, and this time it was actually a work trip that allowed me to join in on their event. It's an interesting thing really, going into a new church full of people you don't know although I did end up recognizing a few people. I was nervous, and although I didn't make any awesome friends or connections, I was blessed.

You see, an interesting thing happened to me Saturday, something that I almost didn't notice. I was standing in a crowd, singing worship songs with ladies young and old that I didn't know and I was thinking about how I was among a group of believers who had a real love for the Lord and were wholeheartedly praising Him. And there was an almost inaudible whisper in the back of my mind that said, "Huh. Who would have thought?"

I think sometimes we as Christians in a sense forget that there are believers in other churches who love God and serve Him in the same way we do, or even more. Yes, you may go to different churches and the people may look different, may worship differently, read a different Bible translation, have a different order of service or may hold to doctrines we don't agree with. But when it comes down to it, they serve the same God, preach the same Gospel, are saved by the same blood and will be going to the same heaven as you. And here we are sitting among them and are somehow almost surprised.

Maybe this post makes me sound very critical. And if I were to be honest, I'd have to admit that I can easily be critical of other believers. It's easy to separate ourselves from other groups or churches, failing to realize that they're Christians just like you!

But I gleaned a lot from worshiping with a different group. I laughed and cried along with others as we listened to the guest speaker share the work God has done in her life and the obstacles she has overcome. I learned a couple of new, beautiful songs, which I encourage you to listen to. They were Jesus Thank You and All the Way My Savior Leads Me, a modern version of the hymn by Chris Tomlin. I can't stop singing them.

I also saw a woman there who I had met earlier that week and I remembered the unusual kindness she had shown me. And now I knew why. She was demonstrating the love of God on her job and it did not go unnoticed. It reminded me how God has placed Christians in all kinds of different places, and how they can be used to show His love to the people that come their way.

I must say I like my church, and for the time, I call it home. I intend to keep worshiping and serving here but I also appreciate what other churches have to offer. I would encourage you not to write off other churches. Don't be afraid to fellowship with other groups of believers, even if you don't agree on all points. You have something special to offer and so do they. It may just be that you will come away blessed and filled with joy like I was.

The Value of Books

2011-02-22T11:35:00.005-05:00

Last month, I posed the following question in one of my posts, which I will attempt to answer:

"Do you think reading is a productive way to spend your time, whether it be classics, literature, history, modern novels, spiritual growth books, etc.? Do you think you can grow as an individual and improve your character in this way? Is this a good way to learn? What are some kinds of books/titles you recommend?"

For the past year, one of my goals has been to study a bunch of classics. Unfortunately, due to the vast number of books I want to read, I haven't gotten very far yet. But I have wondered at times if it's really a useful, beneficial way to use my time. Now, I'm glad I've read other things to receive guidance in this. The Rebelution blog has done a number of posts recently on this topic which I recommend.

Overall, my answer is Yes! Yes, there most certainly is value in reading. I've enjoyed and learned much from many books in the above categories. I like historical fiction, modern fiction, spiritual growth, and self-improvement (to a degree). I'm also a fan of fantasy, filled with adventure, suspense, odd creatures, and a heroic men to rescue and love the young maiden, men who are defenders of the weak.

Now, some Christians have a problem with romance of any sort in books, but the way I see it, relationships are a part of life. If you want to leave it completely out in a novel, you're going to have a pretty boring book. You'd have to have all single characters remain single (or be children) and have no descriptions of love or intimacy between married couples. And that's just not real or exciting. Having said that, there is caution that needs to be taken. I avoid books where the relationship is the sole focus or that include a lot of sensual or intimate details. It takes your mind places it shouldn't and takes your focus off of Christ.

I appreciate Christian fiction that has deep spiritual content or lessons on character. I think that if a novel is well-written, it can teach you almost or just as much as the average spiritual growth/self-improvement book. The lessons are weaved into the story in such a way that it doesn't feel like the author is putting the story on hold to preach to you. A lot of classics are also great to learn valuable character lessons, full of rich language and you learn about history while you're at it!

So yes, books are valuable for learning, growing in character and in our faith. Just be careful about what you're reading, how much time you spend, and how it's affecting your life, relationship with God, thought patterns, and worldview. Also, make sure there is balance. Enjoy a variety of books and a variety of activities in your free time. Allow them to challenge you, stretch your faith, and cause you to grow in your Christian life.

Today, I organized all my books and the above picture includes a couple titles from my shelf. Also, I have updated my book list on the side. It was getting rather long so I took some items off. I also added author's names to what was there to make it easier to find items. Happy reading! :)

Not the Right Time

2011-02-15T11:53:00.003-05:00

A couple weeks ago, I asked the following question and here's my attempt to answer it.

"Have you ever wanted to do something to serve the Lord, only to realize you can't devote the necessary time because of your current responsibilities? How did you deal with this?" (Update: A fellow blogger provided a great answer to this question on his blog here.)

I've come to the realization that I can't do everything at once. As much as people today pride themselves in their ability to multitask, there are only so many projects you can be involved in at once.

There come times in life when we really think we should be serving God somewhere else, and we're very ready to do it. But when we look around at everything else we have on our plates we realize there may not be room. Sure if you made a sacrifice here or there, slept and hour or two less, and dropped this, it could work. It might for a week or a month until you're burnt out, feel disconnected from friends and family and you're left wondering what happened to your life.

There's often so much we feel like doing, but you always have to take your current responsibilities into consideration first. If you have a job or are still in school, you can't exactly put that on the back burner. If you're still living at home, you may have responsibilities there. Of course, you also want to stay in fellowship with believers to grow in your faith. When everything is tallied, there's only so much time to spare.

A couple years ago, I heard a young man teach a lesson on Ecclesiastes 3 and he brought out something so simple, yet so significant. "If there's a time for everything, now is not the time for everything." There's only so much you can do at once, and at some point you have to start saying no. Yes, there may be some great things you can get involved in and you may love to help other people out when they ask you, but sometimes you can't. Once you begin taking up so much, you can't put forth the necessary time and effort. As much as you want to help, you're being unfair to other people if you can't give a task your all.

Sometimes, God has us in a season of preparation that we can't forgo. As anxious as we are to move ahead and make a difference in the world, the timing isn't right. It's only in being faithful in the preparation season in our lives, that God can use us somewhere else later on. And very often, there's great importance in the seemingly insignificant time we presently find ourselves in. We just have to trust God in that.

So if there's something on your heart and it's not going to happen now, does that mean you have to let your dreams fall to the ground and die? Absolutely not! If God has put a desire in your heart, it will not go away, and God will fulfill it. If it's your own ambitions, you might have to let it go. So what do you do in the meantime?

Keep praying about it. God can make ways in the most impossible situations, so pray boldly and specifically. Seek out possible opportunities where you may be able to do what you desire and when you've found something you like, make your desires known. And in the midst of it all, keep praying and watch God work.

February Issue

2011-02-08T15:06:00.002-05:00

The February issue of Lighted Lamp Magazine is now out. I was excited about my article for this month. Be sure to read it and find out a little secret of mine. It's now also available in a pdf format which is much easier to open and read.

Called Only to Preach?

2011-02-04T11:32:00.002-05:00

1 Corinthians 1:17 (ESV)
For Christ did not send me to baptize but to preach the gospel, and not with the words of eloquent wisdom, lest the cross of Christ be emptied of its power.

This verse really caught my attention this morning. Here, Paul is grateful that he didn't baptize many believers because of the divisions in the church caused by the "who-baptized-whom" issue. He even goes so far as to say he wasn't sent to baptize, but to preach. Now I do realize it doesn't say that was called ONLY to preach, as my title indicates. He was a spiritual father and wrote many letters of spiritual exhortation to the churches, but preaching was definitely his sole focus.

However, in what we as Christians commonly refer to as the Great Commission, Jesus commands His disciples to baptize. See what He says.

Matthew 28:18-20 (ESV)
And Jesus came and said to them, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age."

Notice how Jesus doesn't even use the word "preach" in that passage. His command is to make disciples, baptize and teach. But Paul didn't want to baptize. He didn't believe he was called to baptize. He believed his calling was to preach. How does this work?

I think this comparison shows us again that not all Christians are called to do the same thing. The Apostle Paul, one of the great leaders of the early church felt his calling was to preach, not to baptize, as was given in Jesus' command. Now, by saying this I don't mean to nullify what Jesus said, but could it perhaps mean that we are not all called to do what Jesus said to His disciples, or at least, not in the way He said it?

Each Christian has a specific calling for their life and we have to live within that. Not all of us are called to preach, baptize, and disciple others, but we must all love and demonstrate God's love to those around us. Again, I can't say for sure that I'm right on this matter. What do you think?

Life Questions

2011-01-31T14:49:00.004-05:00

I have lots of questions. And I want your help answering them. I've been pondering many things about life and I want to know what other people have to say about them. Most of these are in regards to my life at present. When it comes to making decisions, it's nice to know what other people have to say. I can't say I'll do what you think is best. I can't say I'll answer these questions myself, but I may attack some of them in a different article.

Have you ever wanted to do something to serve the Lord, only to realize you can't devote the necessary time because of your current responsibilities? How did you deal with this? (Update: A fellow blogger was so kind as to answer this question on his blog here.)
Do you ever have to say No to people when they ask you to do things? How do you do this kindly? How do you know what new activities/commitments to take up and what to leave? In other words, how do you know when to say No?
I think I have a few readers who are single young women desiring to be wives and mothers one day. Once you're finished school, what is the best way to spend your in-between years?
If you have a desire to upgrade your education, but don't have a lot of time or money to devote to it, what is the best way to do it? Are there any schools or programs that you recommend? Is there any merit in just researching and learning about anything that interests you on your own without a program?
If you want to be able to generate an income from home while being a mom, what are some good things to look into? What are some good skills or credentials to acquire?
Do you think reading is a productive way to spend your time, whether it be classics, literature, history, modern novels, spiritual growth books, etc.? Do you think you can grow as an individual and improve your character in this way? Is this a good way to learn? What are some kinds of books/titles you recommend?

Like I said, I have some ideas about these questions. These are a lot of the things I have been thinking about. Maybe as I draw some conclusions, I'll write about them more in depth. For now, I'd love your input, and that means ALL my readers. I know that it's harder when you don't know the details of specific situations, but I think there's still things to be said. I like advise from my peers, but I also really appreciate words from those who are older and have had more life experience. Thanks.

Stirring Up Inspiration

2011-01-24T16:43:00.004-05:00

I'm feeling inspired. No, I'm not on the brink of doing some sort of huge crazy thing. It's not like that. I don't know how to describe it or if "inspired" is even the word for it.

What I do know is that I'm being awakened to the idea of how much I'm actually capable of. I've found myself coming up with great ideas (in my opinion) in the oddest of times and places. Okay, so it really hasn't happened that often but I still think it's great. Normally I stress over not having anything to write about, but lately I've gotten frustrated over not having time to write stuff down. Actually, truth be told, after I'm done this, my ideas are gone.

Back to my point. I think we often underestimate ourselves. I don't think we realize our full potential. Thomas Edison once said, "If we did all the things we are capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves." I find that I often fail to use my God-given imagination and creativity. Sometimes I think I don't have any. Is it possible though that we all have something great within us that just needs to be discovered and cultivated? Is it possible that we could do so much more with our lives if we started to believe we could?

I was recently reminded of a quote I heard in a movie a few years ago that inspired me and I wrote down. It wasn't until now that I actually discovered who it was by and that there was actually more to it and I'd like to share it here. It comes from Marianne Williamson's book A Return to Love. Please note, I have not read the book, so I'm not endorsing it or anything. To be honest, I can't say I entirely agree with the quote. I did find it inspiring though and thought there was a good deal of truth in it. So there's my disclaimer.

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were made to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people the permission to do the same. And as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." --Marianne Williamson, A Return to Love

I think all of us deal with feelings of inadequacy at some point in our lives. We wonder if we're good enough. We're convinced somebody else could do it better. We hold back and never put as much as we could into things for fear of failure. Is it possible though, that we fear excellence because we don't think we're worthy of it?

Even as I'm writing this, I'm cringing. Maybe some of my readers didn't even make it this far. I'm sorting out my thoughts as I go, and to be honest, I don't know if anything I'm writing is even right. Sometimes things just spill out of nowhere and I have no idea where those thoughts and ideas come from. Maybe some Christians are reading this and praying I'll one day see the light and come to the knowledge of the truth. I'm taking that risk. I think people would really grow as individuals if they learned to do this. Sometimes you have to ask questions, you have to wonder about the possibilities, you have to speculate.

You're not going to impact the world by thinking about it. Your ideas, as great as they may be do no good inside your head. It's all useless there. It's once you get it out, speak it, write it, sing it, whatever, that it takes on power. But that's exactly the part that so many people are afraid of. They're afraid to be wrong. They wouldn't be the first one. They're afraid that others may not agree or appreciate what they have to say. Guess what? They don't have to! They're afraid nobody will listen, it won't do anything, it won't make a difference. But what if it does? And so we sit around with endless power locked up inside of us and never do anything.

It seems to me that it comes back to influence. We are all in possession of a circle of influence. We can't avoid that. What we do with it is up to us. We can use it for good or bad, to build up the people around us or tear them down. We can use it to lead others to the Lord or drive them away.

People are watching you. You're always communicating something, even if you never say a word. But you do have power over what you communicate. You can decide whether you will share your thoughts and ideas with other people or keep them to yourself. Just remember, people rarely make a positive difference by remaining silent.

Tough Reads

2011-01-17T12:51:00.005-05:00

In the last couple weeks, I've read some tough fiction. You know, the kind of books that are just plain, hard reality, exposing the terrible injustice in the world we live in.

I first read Scared by Tom Davis close to two years ago. I don't think I realized what I was getting myself into. Scared deals with the HIV/AIDS epidemic in Africa. The book starts off with a massacre in the Congo, leaving you a little nauseated. Main character Stuart Daniels captures the horrific scenes on camera, making him an award-winner photojournalist. The problem is, he is haunted by what he saw that. Now, in an effort to save his career, he accepts an assignment that takes him to Swaziland to cover the AIDS issue.

Swaziland is all about survival. People live in extreme poverty. Children are forced to care for themselves and younger orphaned siblings. They often don't have a meal to eat for many days. But in the midst of this, there's a ray of light. Her name is Adanna, a 12-year old orphan girl forced to care for two younger siblings as she personally suffers from hunger and abuse. She has been told by an illuminated man that her gift will save many of her people. That gift is an incredible talent for writing and her poetry is shared throughout the novel. Of course, Stuart and Adanna meet and Stuart's life is changed by the suffering he encounters and the life of this young girl.

Scared was Tom Davis' first novel and it does show. It's written in the first person, present-tense from two perspectives, which kind of threw me off, but it was downright real. You can't read it without being torn emotionally. The series continues with Priceless, and there was a definitive improvement in the writing.

Scared was a heart-wrenching read and Priceless certainly wasn't any easier. It deals with an equally difficult issue: the child sex-slave trade in Russia. The main character again is Stuart Daniels on another journalism trip to Russia. The second perspective is from Marina, a young woman who Stuart met as a little girl in a Russian orphanage on a previous trip who shares her story. In this novel, Stuart gets talked into helping an old friend by going undercover to rescue girls out of their misery.

This book, like the first one, leaves you nauseated at times. It displays the horror girls go through in forced prostitution. I'll spare you the details here. The practice isn't hidden in this area of Russia. Who is the leader of a large chain of places men go to? Sickeningly, it's none other than an Orthodox priest, who has an obsession with George and the Dragonslayer and believes he's actually doing these girls a favour. Priceless, is filled with evil. There's no room for light in this dark, disgusting practice. But it's nothing short of real.

Having given you a summary of these two books, I must say that if you're looking for a light, entertaining read that will leave you feeling warm and fuzzy inside, these aren't for you. But if you want to be enraged at the social injustice of our world and ask "What can I do to stop this?", you don't have to look any further. The sad thing is, the author held a lot back in writing both of these books. They could have been a lot more gruesome and realistic than they are, but Tom wouldn't have been able to do so in writing these Christian books, as he mentions in an interview at the end of Priceless.

You may wonder what compelled the author to write books like these? It's simple. This is Tom's work. Tom is the president of Children's Hope Chest, an organization active in helping orphans in Africa and Russia, among other countries. Tom is no stranger to what life is like in these countries. He's been there and seen it. These books and their character are based on his own experiences and people he has met. He has also authored Fields of the Fatherless, Confessions of a Good Christian Guy, and Red Letters: Living a Faith That Bleeds, all of which I plan on reading. He's also writing a new book in this fiction series, where Stuart is in Haiti at the time of last year's earthquake. I'm looking forward to it.

Another thing I loved about these books is that they give you information on other organizations and sites on these issues. The publisher, David C. Cook, also created video trailers for these books, so if you want to see a preview, check them out. (Scared, Priceless) There are also sites for the book you can check out at www.ScaredTheBook.com and www.SheIsPriceless.com. On the last site there, you can also see videos that Tom Davis made in Russia, showing you some of the actual places where scenes in the book are from. There's a great number of resources you can browse on those sites. I also listened to a great message by the author, which you can find on the Hope Chest site I mentioned earlier.

It's one thing when you hear about poverty, AIDS and slavery, but most people, hearing numbers and statistics won't affect them much. but when you are given characters and can see life through their eyes for awhile, it changes everything. Like I said, these aren't easy books to read, but I assure you they are well worth your time.

Lighted Lamp Magazine

2011-01-09T14:45:00.003-05:00

So, I have something to tell that I'm excited about. There's a new teen e-magazine out, to encourage young people in their walk with the Lord called Lighted Lamp Magazine. I think things like this are great. They give us an opportunity to share and learn from each other and spur each other on for the kingdom. It allows teens to use their God-given gifts to express themselves and bring glory to Him.

This is also the first time I have gotten an article published in a magazine. It's a nice step up from this blog, although the thought of a lot of people reading what I have to say is almost frightening. But I thank God for this new opportunity and look forward to writing more articles for Lighted Lamp.

The magazine will be published on a monthly basis and you can find the very first issue here! I hope you will all be blessed as I was. And for those of you who have moved past the teen years, I trust that you will also greatly benefit from it.

Reflections of 2010

2010-12-30T17:24:00.002-05:00

Another year has come and gone and I've been brought again to a time of reflection. When I started this year, I had no clue what it would hold, but I didn't think I would still be where I am right now. I still work at the same job as I did a year ago, only I have more hours now. I still haven't upgraded my education or pursued a different career, and that's not in my immediate plans either. I'm still single and will still likely be so for awhile, which I'm okay with. But at the same time, I must say I'm a different person.

This year has stretched me in incredible ways. At times, it's been so hard I feared I was near the point of breaking. I think it was this spring, that I for the first time experienced a real longing for heaven, for the trials of this life to be over. I have wrestled between my will and surrendering to God's will for my life. I have wondered what it is God would have me do with my life. I have wrestled with my faith and asked many questions. I have seen people I care about going through loss and heartache.

But amidst all the pain and tears, God has given me joy and hope. He has stood faithfully by my side, even when I haven't been so faithful. I have learned to delight in simple things. I'm learning to be open with who I am and what I believe, without being overly concerned about what people will think. God has given me new opportunities and I have seen him work great things in the lives of others. I have shed tears in hard times, but I have also shed tears when I've been overwhelmed with His goodness. He has carried me through and I'm thankful for that.

It's funny that I'm left once again pondering what the next year of my life will hold. I don't know. (I've heard that's the beginning of wisdom, to be able to say "I don't know.") I do know that God has called me to serve Him faithfully where I am and demonstrate His love to the people around me. Where there's new opportunities, I can jump and say "Ooh, pick me!" Whatever it holds, my desire is to grow, make a difference, and enjoy the life that God has given me.

As you embark on a new year, my prayer is that you would walk with the Lord, grow in love and faith, make a difference and delight in the life you have. God bless you!

They'll Call Me Freedom

2010-12-15T14:00:00.003-05:00

There are certain songs that somehow have a way of touching my heart and then I tend to want to write about them. I wrote an article like this last year on the song "Where is the Love?" and you can read that first if you so wish. Lately, the song that I've really been pondering is Wavin' Flag by K'naan. There has been different mixes of this song for the World Cup, but I'm talking about the original album version, which you can listen to in the previous link. And yes, I encourage you to listen to the song before you read this post.

Every time I hear this song, I can't help but feel that it was written out of experience. When I looked K'naan up, sure enough, he grew up in Somali during the Somali Civil War before he later moved to a Somali community in Toronto with his family. Although I couldn't find any solid information as to the story behind the song, I believe it is deeply rooted in personal experience.

The song starts off with the following lyrics:

"When I get older, I will be stronger
They'll call me freedom, just like a wavin' flag."

Right off, you catch sight of a dream. The dream of a child longing for strength and freedom. Somehow I can imagine a boy watching a flag blowing in the wind and longing to be free like it. He knows there's more in the world than his present state of weakness and longs for it. He has even put a new name to himself: Freedom.

"Born to a throne, stronger than Rome
A violent prone, poor people zone
But it's my home, all I have known
Where I got grown, streets we would roam

Out of the darkness, I came the farthest
Among the hardest survival
Learn from these streets, it can be bleak
Accept no defeat, surrender, retreat

So we're struggling, fighting to eat
And we're wondering when we'll be free
So we patiently wait for that faithful day
It's not far away, but for now we say"

What I absolutely love about this song is that even in the midst of their poverty and oppression, they're still holding on to hope. There's no indication that they're giving up or resigning themselves to this idea that this is the way life will always be for them. They know that freedom is possible. There are other songs that open to us the reality of suffering like James Blunt's "No Bravery" but they don't all offer hope like this one does. What is their hope? I believe to some extent, we are. We can help give them that freedom if we so choose.

"So many wars, settling scores
Bringing us promises, leaving us poor
I hear them say "Love is the way"
"Love is the answer," that's what they say

But look how they treat us, make us believers
We fight their battles, then they deceive us
Try to control us, they couldn't hold us
'Cause we just move forward like Buffalo Soldiers."

In our comfortable North American society, we are pretty sheltered from the bondage so many people find themselves in. They live in poverty, are forced to fight in wars, struggle to eat to stay alive, fighting disease and so forth. Many of these stark realities don't make it to the top of Yahoo News. That spot is saved for the latest article of how bad a celebrity looked in the dress she wore to an event. When we do hear of these things though, we try to shut them out because it's quite uncomfortable.

The fact is, suffering is real and as Christians, we can't sit back and do nothing about it. I'm not even going to pretend to be the right person to talk about this issue. I don't know how to end the suffering in this world and thinking about it isn't going to do a thing. The further I go in life though, the more I know that I need to do something.

Sometimes I think I need to go somewhere else to make a difference. That simply isn't true. There are people that are going out that need our support in the form of prayers, finances and practical aid. In America, we can so easily waste so much money without a second thought. But add up some of those small expenditures and you will be surprised how much you're really spending.

In October I started a budgeting plan and began to record every dollar I spent. Yes, I wrote down every coffee, smoothie and pastry purchased as well as money spent eating out. In October, I spent about $43.00 on eating out and snack food combined. Close to $25 was spent on recreation. In November, I again spent close to $40 on snack food and eating out.

Now if you go to Thirst Relief, you discover that a donation of $5 can provide a long-term clean drinking water solution for one person. That means that because of your donation, somebody (likely a child) in a third-world country doesn't have to die because of a contaminated water related disease. I know that one life doesn't sound like much, but what if I take those $40 I carelessly spent over the course of a month and donated it for a year, I would have saved $480 and in turn impacted nearly 100 lives.

Now, $40 does sound like a lot of money, but say you only donated $10 a month. You have still saved 24 lives for just a small sacrifice. So what if you don't get your Timmies coffee, fancy Starbucks drink or go to see every latest movie? You can make that coffee at home for like 5 or 10 cents and rent the movie later for cheaper. The fact is, you have helped someone else in desperate need.

Jesus said in Matthew 10:42 "And whoever gives one of these little ones even a cup of cold water because he is my disciple, truly, I say to you, he will by no means lose his reward." (ESV)

I may not be able to put an end to the suffering described in "Wavin' Flag." I may not be able to end modern-day slavery, feed every hungry child or care for every orphan. But by small sacrifices, that really aren't sacrifices at all, I can make a difference in the life of someone else. And if I can encourage others to do the same, we can multiply that impact.

"When I get older, I will be stronger
They'll call me freedom, just like a wavin' flag."

Let's go give somebody back their freedom!

Keeping Discussions Edifying

2010-12-06T15:35:00.003-05:00

I'm a person that likes a good discussion. I think it's good when people can get together and share their different opinions, viewpoints and convictions on different issues. It challenges you to be sure of what you believe and stand for and it's also an opportunity to open up and let people see who you are.

However, sometimes these good discussions can easily turn into arguments and debates that are less than edifying. And often by the time that happens, the people involved are so focused on pushing their points they hardly notice or care that the conversation has taken a negative turn. I am one of those.

It's easy to "believe" something because somebody else said it. Saying "That sounds good to me so that's what I now believe too" is just too convenient, especially when you trust the person who said it. The problem is that you haven't actually looked into the matter yourself, never thought it through and don't know if it actually has any true scriptural basis. You just assume it is because so-and-so said it so it must be right. Then you get into these lively arguments and discover you have nothing to back up your ideas.

Back to my point. It's good to have discussions but it's also easy to become very defensive or to attack other people for what they believe. Instead of promoting unity and edification, it turns bad. So I guess what I'm trying to get at is how to have discussions, express our opinions and disagree in a proper manner. And just to be clear, I'm thinking this through because I've realized my own negative tendencies in this area.

For one, it's okay to disagree. I would almost go so far as to say that it's good to disagree. If you agree with everything everybody else says, that may be a good indication something is wrong in your way of thinking. You're not filtering what you're hearing and measuring it up against what you know to be right and true or what the Bible says.

Secondly, you can still love each other even when you disagree. You can still enjoy fellowship with each other as the body of Christ. Also remember that the Spirit of God works differently in people. He may not have convicted your friend of the same thing He has you. And you know what, maybe He never will. Some people think that God convicts people all of the same, but it's simply not true.

James 3:17
But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. (ESV)

When I read this verse awhile ago, I think the part that stuck out to me the most was "open to reason." A person who is truly wise is open to reason. But a lot of Christians are just the opposite. When questioned about what they believe or an area of their life, they instantly become defensive and often upset or angry. They're not open to the possibility that they might be wrong and the other right. In their minds, they're right, no questions asked, discussion closed. There's no reasoning with them.

I've found myself on both ends. I have a tendency to both attack and defend. It's not wrong to suggest someone else may not be right, but be careful in how you do that.

Like the above verse says, be gentle and peaceable. Attack the opinion, not the person. Try saying, "I disagree with that idea" or express your concern in the form of a question instead of flat out saying "That's wrong." When somebody makes a good point, say so. Make sure you understand what is said. When things warm up, it's easy to misunderstand people and get the totally wrong idea.

Most of all, hear people out. As much as you want to get your two cents in, listen to what others have to say. Don't hog the floor. And be open to reason. As much as it may hurt your pride, the truth is you're not always right. Be open to that possibility. And if you think people are shutting out everything you have to say, don't worry. They may not look like they care what you have to say and don't push it onto them. But chances are, what you have said will stay with them and they will think it over later. They won't show you it and it may take a long time, but they might just come around to your way of thinking.

2 Timothy 2:23
But foolish and unlearned questions avoid, knowing that they do gender strifes. (KJV)

Ephesians 4:29
Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. (ESV)

So remember, discussions are great but keep away from arguing. Sometimes it may be wiser to stay on safer subjects than diving into controversial conversations. Build up rather than tear down. If you disagree, that's okay. Just be willing to listen.

In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the beginning of our real Canadian winter.

Not to Be Taken Lightly

2010-11-28T14:29:00.002-05:00

I came to a somewhat frightening realization this week. I started to notice that in my way of thinking, I was starting to take Christ's sacrifice lightly. I was starting to develop a mentality that what He did for me is really not that big of a deal. I was belittling my salvation.

If we're not careful, this can happen easily, often without realizing it. We handle our salvation carelessly and forget what it is that Jesus actually gave up and suffered to forgive us and grant us eternal life. And likewise, we can do the same thing with our eternal destination and that of others.

Of course it's easy to see many people who are careless about their salvation. They claim to be Christians but live just like the world, indulging in all that it offers and living in blatant sin. Instead of striving for holiness, they wave it off with grace, a God-loves-me-anyway line, or since I prayed a prayer on such-and-such a day, I'm saved and will go to heaven when I die. But we can be careless in our way of thinking just as easily, and that will eventually affect the way we live.

Now, I'm not about to drag any eternal security doctrine into this. I'm still not sure myself where I stand on that matter. I hold an idea that goes more like "know you're saved, love God, love others, obey His Word and walk with Him." If you're doing that, eternal security isn't even a question that people need to grapple with.

I was reminded of a few verses of scripture as I was thinking on this issue.

Hebrews 2:1
"Therefore we ought to give the more earnest heed to the things which we have heard, lest at any time we should let them slip." (KJV)
Hebrews 2:3a
"how shall we escape if we neglect such a great salvation?" (ESV)

Philippians 2:12, 13
"Therefore, my beloved, as you have always obeyed, so now, not only as in my presence but much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure." (ESV)

Don't take Christ's sacrifice lightly. Thank Him constantly, remembering your lost, wretched condition and the great price He paid to redeem you. I think this is a key factor in walking in righteousness. God bless!

God's Call

2010-11-15T11:00:00.002-05:00

How is it that you think you want something, and then when you're about to get it, you realize you don't want it at all? That when you're in a certain season of life you don't particularly enjoy and it looks like it may be fading, you want to cling to it for dear life? Realizing that you really don't want anything other than what you have is an odd experience, and it comes with mixed emotions.

For a long time, I've been pondering God's will for my life. For a long time, I have felt like I am doing nothing for God. While others are going out and being missionaries and preaching the Gospel in unreached nations, I'm living a simple, ordinary life, not having a significant impact on the world. Aren't we as Christians supposed to be active in soul-winning and outreach? Isn't it what God has called us to? But at the same time, I'm starting to think (and this may be very bold and even "un-Christian" of me to say) that many of us are being made to feel guilty if we aren't active in missions and soul-winning. I think many of us are being made to feel less godly or that we are not fulfilling God's call on us as Christians if we aren't on the streets preaching to the lost. I'm starting to think that the Bible paints a very different picture.

I'll be honest. I tend to be shy and reserved. I hate approaching new people. I even have a hard time with my job, to have to interact with people everyday. I don't walk up to people and speak to them about the condition of their souls. I'd have to say that I'm actually afraid to do that. And I'm starting to think that in a way, that's okay.

Now some may be quick to say we have to get over our fear of man, be empowered by the Spirit of God and openly share the Gospel with people all the time. However, doesn't the Bible make it clear that, although we are called to preach the Gospel to all nations, each one of us has different gifts. Prophets and apostles are no doubt much better at these things, and Paul tells us to desire these gifts. But there are other gifts that, although they may not be recognized as much as the others, that are no less important than the first. Where Paul speaks of this in 1 Corinthians 12, he makes it clear that although people all have different gifts, they all come by the same Spirit. He also explains that we are all members of the same body and that each part, no matter how small is important, that even the weakest or less honourable members are necessary. I think at times we fail to see the "other" people in the Bible. You know, the farmers and homemakers. Ordinary Christians.

God has been showing me this past week again that He has given me a work to do right where I am. At times, it's not what I want to do but I've been learning that this life isn't about myself. So, I have determined to take it up cheerfully and make the most of it. And you know what I've discovered? It irritates people. People do not like seeing you have a good attitude about something that they do not want to do, and make it clear how they feel about it. God has given me a work in which I can be a blessing, a place where I have the ability to serve in a way that not many people are able or willing to do. And I've realized that I am actually doing hard things. I may not be jumping out of my comfort zone and accomplishing great things that many around the world will hear about. I'm doing the small things, that few people will recognize and appreciate and in so doing, I'm not gaining an earthly reward but a heavenly one of much greater value.

I was encouraged and blessed by a conversation I had with a young man a few weeks ago. When I explained how I felt like I wasn't doing anything of value, he assured me that I am right where God wants me. I may not have a great vision but that simply means that God hasn't given me it yet and that's okay. God has great plans for my life, and when he reveals those to me, I will be able to step forward in confidence knowing that I am in His will. In the meantime, I am called to prepare. It's like being stranded at sea and praying for wind so I can get where I want to go. I can pray for wind, and God may send it, but if my sails are down, I'm not going anywhere. The illustration reminded me of a scene in Facing the Giants where Mr. Bridges speaks to Grant about two farmers praying for rain. Both of them prayed, but only one went out to prepare his field to receive it, thus demonstrating faith. God will send the rain when He's ready; we have to prepare our fields to receive it.

For a moment I wondered how I can prepare for something if I don't know what it is? I don't know. What I do know is that I am right where God wants me today and I can keep on doing what I'm doing for His glory until He shows me otherwise.

Not all of us are called to be Hudson Taylors or Amy Carmichaels and that's okay. God doesn't intend for us to be. There are thousands of godly men and women who have followed God's call on their lives. The only problem is we have never heard of them. That's because they weren't out on the front lines where everyone could see them. They may not even have won many souls for the Lord. They may have just been ordinary Christians living ordinary lives, but they did what they could to serve, bless, and show God's love to the people around them and in so doing, they were perfectly fulfilling God's will for their lives.

Like me, you may feel you have nothing to give, but that's not true. You have everything to give. You don't have to go searching for anything else to do or keep wondering what's next. You can fulfill God's calling for your life right where you are. And even if it seems small, you can make an impact.

Why We Remember

2010-11-11T10:34:00.004-05:00

Today is one of those special days in every year, when people all around, both young and old come together to commemorate the sacrifice of the men and women who have fought for our nation. This morning, the parking on the street in front of our store was blocked off for the gathering at the cenotaph, of which I happened to have a good view. Prior to the 11:00, cadets walked around handing out poppies. I wonder about these young men in uniform and their dedication, their hearts already turned towards the good of their nation. As I watched officers march, and even young scouts, I was reminded of the men and women who still serve today.

The high school band assembles and strains of beloved hymns such as "Onward Christian Soldiers" (which we sing together later on along with our national anthem) and "Abide With Me" echo through the town. Young children, possibly from a school gather as well to witness this special service. It's a touching sight and I too step out of our store alongside many spectators.

It's a wonder how certain things, certain dates even, bring people together with one common purpose in mind. Days when life isn't about yourself, when we recognize and honour the sacrifice of men, women, and families. Times when we come together to recognize a Power greater than mankind. This morning I watched people come together and listen with solemnity and respect as Scripture was read out of Ephesians 6 and a minister spoke about putting on the full armour of God and prayers were offered for those who continue to serve our nation. This was not a sight you see in public every day, and was not politically correct, but what a blessing! It was a good reminder that war still exists, not just overseas, but we're all fighting in this spiritual war, one that is not against flesh and blood, and as Christian soldiers, we must continue to fight.

Today is not the only day people come together for such occasions. 9/11, a tragedy that our generation witnessed, is another such day that, when people gather to mourn the loss of loved ones and honour the sacrifice of the thousands of rescue workers. It's beautiful to see pain bringing people together.

Will there be more such days? Today we commemorate the end of one war. Will there be a day when we commemorate the end of all war? I know we will, but it will not be around a cenotaph. It will be around the throne of God, where He will wipe away all our tears, and war will be no more.

Prioritizing Life

2010-11-08T20:15:00.002-05:00

If you're anything like me, you're bad with priorities. Life is busy, there's too much to do (or too much you want to do) and not enough time. How do you know what comes first or how to juggle everything?

Okay, so in comparison to many people, my idea of a busy life is a joke. I like things to be fairly relaxed and I get frazzled easily. Even in the midst of work, church, home life, family, etc., I still have an amount of spare time on my hands that many would consider a luxury. The problem is, there's so much I want to do in that spare time.

As we speak, I have a couple stacks of books in my room waiting to be read. In fact, I was able to get 6 books for $3 today at thrift store. I could go crazy in their book section. I work in an awesome store, but I still can't do that there. I have more lists of things I want to read and actually study. There's all kinds of other things I would love to do, things I want to cook, bake, stuff I want to learn to do.

So here's the thing: what comes first? How do your prioritize your life? Of course, my responsibilities should always be of utmost importance. I have a job, I help carry the load of keeping a home in order and running. Church is not something you should neglect. Meeting together regularly for worship and study is important. That doesn't mean I make it to every Bible study, prayer meeting or other event at church, but I do when I can (and feel up for it.)

As a Christian, God is supposed to be our #1 in life. But what exactly does that even mean? (Wait, what does prioritizing even mean?) If Jesus is number one, does that mean all my waking hours have to be devoted to prayer and study, every spare moment has to be devoted to worship and serving others? Having thought about this, my answer is no. Christ can still be our main priority and the central focus of our life without all of our activity being explicitly Christian.
The truth is, we can honour God in all our daily activities. Christ can be the main focus of our life, and we can still enjoy recreational activities. At least that's what I think.

How did that just explain how to determine what comes first, or how to spend our spare time? I have no idea. It didn't. The truth is, I don't know how your prioritize recreational activities or wants. Perhaps it has to do with what is a greater benefit to your relationship with God, others or yourself. Perhaps it's determined by finances, education or usefulness. I don't know.

Life is all about choosing one thing over another. Something must always be given precedence in every situation. Decisions have to be made. My words of wisdom: Choose wisely. Use well the short time you have been given. Love and honour the Lord, put others before yourself (your life is not about yourself), and then enjoy that free time God gives you as you see fit.

Finding Joy in the Simple Things

2010-10-21T11:12:00.003-04:00

I'm finally back! I know my inconsistency must get irritating, but I've been thinking through possible posts and just wasn't satisfied with anything. So this one will be kind of random once again. My life has been nothing short of busy this past month, which can be difficult and stressful, but also something I'm learning to enjoy.

I've been reflecting on this year and have had a lot of things to think through. It has not been easy at all. At times I wondered if I could handle any more, but God sustained me through every step. Illness and death has touched the lives of people close to me and seeing their grief and pain is so hard. I've fought a lot of inner turmoil, questions, doubts and fears and my faith has been stretched.

Nevertheless, I've seen God do some incredible things and I'm seeing Him do incredible things as we speak. I have learned to hope and find joy and laughter in the small, simple things. The adorable facial expressions or witty remarks of a child. Mindlessly insulting myself and accidentally offending someone else. (That was a good one!) Laughing when things go badly, but still hilariously, wrong. Listening to a young person excitedly speak of the Lord's working in their life or tell me of all their dreams, hopes, plans, and desires. Sharing special moments with special friends. Feeling the sun on my face and the wind at my back. Seeing the leaves change gorgeous, warm colours. Knowing I made a customer at work happy. Savouring a meal or dessert, and if you know me, you know how much I love that. Being giddy with excitement for no explainable reason and hearing God laugh with me. Oh, if only we could have a greater spirit of gratitude and rejoice in the small, delightful pleasures God grants us each and every day!

Otherwise, I'm learning to enjoy this season of my life right now. Or trying to, at least. I only have it once, and its gifts can only be enjoyed while I have it. I must learn to trust in God's protection and plans for my life. They are amazing and I can experience all of the wonderful things He has for me if I only surrender to His will and control.

I've also been enjoying some more reading, which I try to keep balanced. I'm working my way through the Legends of the Guardian King books and have been enjoying a lot of the great spiritual substance along with the story of a man fighting for what is good and right, clinging to and surrendering to the Light in the most impossible circumstances. At the same time, I've read books on business ideas, singleness and I actually started reading a devotional that I surprisingly like. I have a bit of a wary opinion of many devotionals, but when I discovered One Year Devotions for People of Purpose by Charles Colson, I knew I would like it. Each day, I'm learning about a new person, book, cultural issue, historical event or ways to impact the world around me. Thus far, I have read about William Wilberforce, Dr. Ben Carson, homosexuality, marriage, Harry Potter and other things related to books, film, music and ideas. It's been great so far and definitely one I would recommend.

My encouragement to you today is to rejoice in the little things. Learn to love, laugh and find delight in the simple things God sends your way. Make the most of every situation. Stop stressing over the business of life and dive in and enjoy what you're doing. And then. . . .take time to curl up with blanket, book, coffee and something sweet! :)

So I Read a Guys Book

2010-10-04T20:24:00.008-04:00

So I read a guys book last week. As in a book written for guys. *Gasp* I know it's shocking. Actually, I take great delight in shocking people. But that's not why I did it. You see, I've considered reading several different "guys books" before, but the problem was, well, they were for guys. Was it okay for a girl to read guys books? What would people say? Better not. Until a pastor recommended reading Hero: Becoming the Man She Desires by Fred and Jasen Stoeker. I felt that was a sufficient go-ahead.

I actually found justification for this the other day too, when I found a post on Fred Stoeker's blog, written by a girl who had read it, and said it was a good book for girls to read too. If you don't believe me, read the article for yourself. I was pretty excited when I read that.

Since I haven't said it yet, here goes. Hero is an awesome book that I would recommend all young people to read. It teaches men to be protectors of purity and leave every girl better off for having known her. It addresses the lies among guys today about dating, sex, and marriage. It encourages guys to stand up and be men! At the same time, I was reading Answering the Guy Questions by Leslie Ludy (also awesome by the way), so it was a nice balance.

Whereas in Every Young Man's Battle, readers can learn about co-author Fred Stoeker's story, Hero tells Jasen's story. Jasen is a man who's family tree was filled with sexual sin and Fred feared for his son. However, Jasen made the decision early on to honour God and live a life of purity. At the young age of eleven, he was first invited by some boys at school to view a pornographic magazine. And he walked away. Soon, he began asking teachers to be excused from PG13 rated movies to avoid seeing any sexual content they contained. He endured the mockery of his peers for years as he skipped out on dozens of movies and did what he knew was right. And all of these decisions he made on his own, without his father having anything to do with it. The book goes on to tell of his relationship with his wife, leadership he took in their relationship and how he strove to protect their purity above all. On their wedding day, when they shared their first kiss, the audience went absolutely crazy! It was incredible.

Hero exposes the amount of sexual sin and compromise present in the church today, and sadly, how widely accepted it has become. It tells about the problems of pornography and masturbation in today's Christian colleges. One of the saddest things about the book was when the facebook profiles of three pastoral students were examined. Things like God and following Jesus were stated among their interests, which appears to be in order for men pursuing a career in the ministry. What was disturbing were their lists of favourite movies, including many rated R for sexuality. The author went on to describe some of the sexual content in these movies, not because he wanted to, but because he felt it was necessary for readers to understand what they were dealing with. There were words in there I had never even heard of, and judging from some other details and words they were grouped with, I thought it best not even to look them up. The sin and depravity described was disgusting. And yet these were favourite movies of young men going into the ministry. This was their entertainment. Is that someone you would want pastoring your church? Not me, that's for sure!

One of the things I appreciated so much was how they emphasized guys being protectors of purity, leaving every girl better off for having known him. In our society, this is very rare to see. I've been blessed by the young men in our church, who look out for the girls all the time. I really appreciate it.

I'm sure there's more I wanted to say about this book, but it's slipping my mind right now. Since I have broken the ice once and for all, I'll probably end up reading a few of those other "guys books" I've often considered, such as:
God's Gift to Women by Eric Ludy (I found a review by a girl on this one too!)
Every Young Man's Battle by Fred Stoeker and Stephen Arterburn
For Young Men Only by Jeff Feldhahn and Eric Rice
The Mark of a Man by Elisabeth Elliot

But then again, I might not. But there are some suggestions for my male readers.

I'm not sure how much you all like reading my reviews and thoughts on other books. Maybe my posts are very unoriginal. But I'm trying to get something on here that's going to make a point and hopefully have an impact on somebody else's life. Thank you for your patience. God bless!

The Twelve Pillars of Success

2010-09-29T11:14:00.004-04:00

I'm often a little wary of success books, especially when they exude a "health, wealth and prosperity" mentality. Even so, some of them have some great practical points about life.

Over the past few weeks, I've been studying Twelve Pillars by Jim Rohn and Chris Widener. It's a book about a middle-aged man learning about the Twelve Pillars of Success from the caretaker of a large estate characterized by its twelve white pillars. Although there were points I can't say I totally agree with and I wouldn't put this forth as the ultimate model for success in life, I was inspired by many points and believe that it was written from a Christian perspective.

So what are these twelve pillars as outlined in this book?

1. Develop Yourself
2. Total Well-Being
3. The Gift of Relationships
4. Write Down Your Goals
5. The Proper Use of Time
6. Surround Yourself with the Best People
7. Be a Life-Long Learner
8. All of Life is Sales
9. Income Seldom Exceeds Personal Development
10. Communication
11. Leadership
12. Leave a Legacy

I won't expound on all of those, but just share some of my favourite points.

In order for us to succeed in life, we need to grow as individuals. If you want your circumstances in life to change, you first have to change as a person. As Christians, we can do this as we allow God to work in us and change us into His image.

On the issue of total well-being, three-dimensional health (body, soul, spirit) was explained and how we need to care for each one. If one part of our body suffers, the others suffer as well. It's all interconnected.

Relationships are God's most precious gift here one earth. Cultivating them often takes a good deal of effort and sometimes pain, but it's so worth it. "The greatest gift the Grand Designer gives is the gift of other people. Yes, relationships can be hard, but they are also what the joy of life is made of."

Time management is something I haven't mastered yet. I often find myself wasting so much precious time just thinking of all the things I have to do. I need to start thinking less and start doing more. We can endure the pain of discipline now, or deal with the pain of regret later.

Surrounding ourselves with the right people is so crucial, especially as Christians. The Bible speaks so much on this issue. In order to succeed in life, we need to spend time with those who share our values, goals and visions and will inspire and encourage us. "Go where the expectations and demands to perform are high." 1 Corinthians 15:33 says "Bad company ruins good morals." Surround yourself with godly people who desire to live above the mediocrity of this world.

Learning doesn't end when we finish school. It's something you have to do all your life. You can't escape it. What I appreciated was the book list included in this chapter, including some well-known Christian authors and titles. There's so much out there to learn, but make sure the knowledge is true and applied. Until you apply and live out what you know, it's useless.

Most of all though, what will be left of your life when it's over? Your life doesn't end when you die and leave this world. The seeds you have sown continue to grow and affect the next generation and maybe many more. Will you leave a legacy? What will people remember of you? It reminds me of the importance of living a life that counts, that will make an impact for eternity.

No, Twelve Pillars isn't my preferred road map for life. I'll sooner turn to the Bible and other trusted Christians for that. But sometimes it's good to have a practical reminder of the things that matter and this book did a good job of that. But if you like success books as much as I do, I understand.

Rededication?

2010-09-11T10:20:00.004-04:00

Lately, I've been really inspired by Louie Giglio and as I was searching him on Youtube and came across this video where he speaks on the issue of "rededication" and I loved what he had to say. (Watch the video below first if you like to understand my thoughts better. I couldn't figure out how to get my text under the video.) Rededication is something I have often found myself wondering about. I can't help but notice how many Christians speak of having rededicated their lives, sometimes several times, when they share their testimonies. Don't get me wrong, but somehow I have a feeling there's something really wrong with this concept. Somehow I feel that God meant for the Christian life to be different. I don't know if my thoughts here on this issue are right, but I will throw them out there anyway.

I know it's something I have dealt in my own life in the past. I walked this inconsistent life for a long time. It seemed an endless cycle of ups and downs and "rededication" if you will. You're doing so great for awhile and then you slide downhill and come to God and say "From now on, it's going to be different. What I did back there will never happen again. I rededicate my life to You and from now on I will live a godly life." And then you're great for awhile. You read your Bible more, you pray more, you clean up the sin in your life. But after about two weeks, your initial fire dies and soon you're doing the same thing all over again.

You see, I think the problem with rededication is that many Christians are approaching it in their own strength and they don't realize they can't do it on their own. I mean, do you really think that after you've messed up, you can come to God and promise Him that you'll never mess up again, that from here on in, it'll just be a steady upward road? What a joke! Can we really make God any promises? You might as well be saying "God, I plan on living a righteous holy life from now on, and I can do it ON MY OWN!!!

I think Louie has it right when he says we have to surrender. We can't live the Christian life in our own strength and you will never get anywhere promising God you will never mess up again. It'll be a continuous cycle and you will be miserable. I know I was. We have to surrender our lives to God and walk in grace, in the Spirit, trusting Him to uphold us in our walk.

I don't think that rededication is a Biblical concept. I think what people need is more repentance and revival, not more rededication. They need to surrender their lives to God and walk in the Spirit instead of trying to living godly lives in their own strength. It just doesn't work otherwise.

Please do share your thoughts on this. I'm not sure I have this right either and I had trouble wording my thoughts, but it's a concept in modern-day Christianity that has really been nagging me and I finally heard somebody say it right. So, if you don't like what I have to say or it doesn't make sense, listen to Louie. I think he has it right.

In One Verse

2010-09-06T14:56:00.003-04:00

Have you ever tried summarizing the Christian life or salvation in one sentence? It can be difficult to wrap the Gospel into one sentence that people will fully understand. I recently encountered a verse where Jesus, in my opinion, perfectly describes the Christian life:

If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.
-John 14:23

It speaks of us loving Christ, keeping His commands, God loving us and coming down to live with us and in us. I'm glad that at some point, it seems Jesus thought, "Simply put, there it is. In case anybody has problems understanding what it is I want for them."

More small reflections on scripture hopefully coming soon.

Hiding Pain

2010-08-24T21:07:00.002-04:00

I've been meaning to get this post up for awhile now, but I've been lacking time to sit down and write. The topic of pain is something I've been thinking on lately and I'm not sure where this is going to go or how these thoughts will unfold. Forgive me in advance if it's really random.

People hide pain all the time. You may not see it, but I can assure you it's there. So many individuals have a huge load of of hurt bottled up and tucked away deep inside of them. Of course, they'll never tell you. They usually don't want anybody to know it's there. But all of a sudden they come to a point where it comes to the surface and they want to burst.

I've come to really like songs that speak about a person's pain, songs that challenge Christians to reach out to those who are hurting, songs that encourage people to admit their hurt. Casting Crowns has a few such songs. One called Does Anybody Hear Her tells the story of a girl who longs to be accepted and loved and who gives herself away in search of affection. At one point, she tries going to church, but nobody reaches out to help her. Stained Glass Masquerade is another one that speaks about hiding pain and feelings of inadequacy and putting on a mask and making it looks like everything's okay. But I also love to listen to songs that speak about people healing. Held by Natalie Grant is a song of comfort when I'm going through a hard time.

The truth is, people are hurting all around us, and although they may never say anything, they're inwardly crying out for someone to care. Are you reaching out to them? Or are you one of those who is hurting and needs someone to care? Find a trusted friend and talk to them. You don't need to carry your load alone. I would just add a word of caution though. Often our pain is caused by other people and although it can often be difficult, try to avoid using names or slandering others where possible. And be careful with what you share with friends of the opposite sex. Some things can be inappropriate to share in detail and can cause an unhealthy emotional attachment.

And it could also be that one of your friends has hurt you. Or maybe you have hurt them. Of course you'd rather not to talk about it. You don't want to risk damaging your friendship. Talking to a friend about how you have hurt each other can be an extremely difficult thing to do, but my experience has actually been that it draws us closer together instead of tearing us apart. It can be very humbling either way, but it's worth saving a close friendship.

So there's a few of my thoughts on the matter from the past few weeks. My prayer is that you would seek to help others in their times of pain and seek God's healing and peace for your own. God bless!

Surprise Military Reunions

2010-08-13T09:27:00.001-04:00

No, I don't intend to replace my regular blogging with videos, but I really like this one! And I promise a solid post soon.

What is Ellerslie?

2010-08-06T21:16:00.001-04:00

This is a great video about Ellerslie from the students themselves!

My Wonderful Job

2010-07-30T20:46:00.002-04:00

As some of you may know, for the past year and a half or so, I've been working in a local Christian bookstore and I really enjoy my job. This past month though, we've worked hard on making some significant changes. We have repainted, replaced the not-so-pretty hardwood with a nice carpet, got all new shelving and a ton of new products. It looks sharp, to say the least. It has meant a lot of hard work and things looking a lot worse before they looked better, but tomorrow morning we reopen for our first day as a new store and a new name.

I used to love being able to say I worked in a Christian bookstore. But we're not a bookstore anymore. We're now a family store. Our focus is to promote traditional values, faith, family and healthy relationships. So we now carry more products to promote that and bring families together.

It has been so much fun bringing all the things together and digging into boxes upon boxes of wonderful new stuff. We have a ton educational games, toys and other cool children's stuff. And although we're moving back a little on books, we've gotten some neat new lines of children's books as well as classics. We're now proud retailers of Yankee candles, and with their wonderful scents the store will never grow stale. We also carry four awesome line of natural bath and body products. Oh, and did I already mention that we have all kinds of fun, old-fashioned candy?

So, I work in a store that sells books, Bibles, music, greeting cards, giftware, bath and body, toys, games, candy and we also have DVD rentals. I'm probably forgetting about something, but then I could be here forever. Sometimes when I think about it, it seems so random, but I love it.

Our grand opening is tomorrow and I'm definitely looking forward to it. The hard work is so worth it. Also, check us out on Facebook under Returning Home.

Until next time, God bless!

Living Out Our Faith Here

2010-07-24T10:34:00.003-04:00

As a young person, my mind has often been full of dreams. Some of them can get a little wild, crazy and unrealistic and we can be thankful they will likely never happen. But then all of a sudden one day, a dream comes along and grows as the desire grows stronger, and for once it actually seems to be within reach. No, it doesn't necessarily make sense but it appears very possible, and now suddenly I'm filled with fears.

As I've been thinking about what I want to do with my life and the places I want to go, I've been struck with an interesting challenge. I mean, if your dream is to go be a missionary in some third world country and you're willing to go, that's great, right? Isn't it wonderful that many young people want to go out and serve the Lord and other people? It would certainly seem so.

But what if that young person fails to live out their faith on the home front? What if that young person fails to put into practice and apply the knowledge he or she already has? Going to a great Bible school or to the mission field is great, but if you're not living things out right where you are, I can't help but wonder what's the point? I'm speaking of myself.

Now, I don't want to be negative here. Please don't get that impression. But as I've been dreaming, I've come to realize one thing. I've read so many great books on Christian living, heard so much great teaching and learned so much, but it seems that it all remains head knowledge. I'm failing to apply the principles and live out what I'm learning where I am. Until I can do that, would I be effective or would it even be beneficial to shoot for something else?

The truth is, we have a mission field all around us. And truth be told, a lot us, myself on top of the list, are being really lazy missionaries. We take in so much head knowledge and can enthusiastically utter all the Amens! and Preach-it-brothers! but our lives display little of what we so heartily agree with or believe in. We can say "Yes, the world is dying and going to hell. Yes, they need to hear the Gospel. Yes, somebody needs to go tell them about Jesus, etc. Oh, now look at the time. I have so much to do yet at home. See you Sunday!"

We don't need to go anywhere else to share the Gospel. There are people all around us who are hurting and have yet to hear and see a true demonstration of God's love. Even just in our own homes, do we demonstrate the love of Christ, or are we just another person who goes to church?

I must admit that I can be very shy and hate approaching new people, especially to share the Gospel. I'm a fan of my security and I like to stay where it's safe. I can't stand not knowing things and want to be sure that everything is going to work out all right in all circumstances. Now, if I'm like this at home, how am I possibly going to react somewhere else? I have to learn here to put my security in God, not my circumstances.

This is what I'm being convicted of lately. Yes, I have dreams that are absolutely wonderful, but can I first live out my faith right where I am? Can I first be faithful where God has placed me right now? Can I demonstrate God's love and share it with those whom I encounter on a daily basis? Can I trust God with all the details of my life, no matter what happens? Until I can do those things, would I really be ready to take my faith anywhere else?

That last question there is certainly open for reader opinions and comments. I'm not sure if there is a definite yes or no answer to my questions. What do you guys think of the matter? Are you living it out here?

Serving Behind the Scenes

2010-07-12T10:47:00.002-04:00

Do you ever think about what all goes on "behind the scenes"? It's easy to be unaware of what goes on there, since we can't see it. And the people who are quietly serving there are easily forgotten.

I was reminded of this last week after the passing of the mother of a very influential family. I realized that if it hadn't been for this mother, her sons may not have had the impact on the many lives they do today. It's easy to forget the mothers who cared for and nurtured her children into the men and women they are today. It's easy to forget the tireless hours of serving, listening, praying and offering counsel that aren't recognized and appreciated enough. Do you realize that if it wasn't for those efforts, the men and women who we so admire may never have come to be who they are?

Who else do you know that serves quietly and often lacks notice? There are so many Christians out there who faithfully serve behind the scenes and they never receive any praise or recognition for the work they do. Sometimes, their tasks may seem menial, but they are essential to hold everything else together.

I know that often I fail to appreciate the people who have had a significant effect on my life. Sometimes we have a serious misconception about the work that people do. How often do you sit in your church on a Sunday morning with the mindset that all your pastor ever does is sit in his study and prepare sermons? The truth is, that pastor does so much more to keep things in the church running smoothly. There are events throughout the week, people to counsel, meetings, not to mention a family to be a husband and father to. The demands on the pastor couple can certainly not always be easy.

Now my question is, do you pray for and support those people who serve behind the scenes or spend a significant amount of time pouring into your life? Do you express your gratitude and offer your support? Do you realize that behind the people who have a greatest influence on your life are mothers, fathers, mentors, teachers, pastors, people that listened, prayed and offered encouragement? None of them got to where they are alone. There's always people who served quietly behind the scenes shaping them into the godly men and women they are.

You may be one of those who doesn't like serving behind the scenes. Sometimes it's boring and it doesn't seem all that important. Nobody recognize the efforts you put in and you wonder if it's even worth it. My encouragement to you is to be faithful in those little things. The work you do is important, even if it's as small as washing the dishes for your mom. Take the time to pray for and encourage those who spend time pouring into your life. It's the least you can do.

It's easy to get discouraged, but do not grow weary in well-doing. In due time, you will be rewarded.

DVD Review

2010-07-03T14:10:00.003-04:00

Okay, so for the record, I don't watch too many movies. That's largely due to the difficulty of finding good wholesome Christian films, and just that I don't spend a whole lot of time sitting down to watch something. But there are some that I would quickly recommend and am totally ready to watch again and here's my review of some of those.

A Greater Yes is a great Rebelutionary film. It's the true story of Amy Newhouse, a high school girl who seeks to reach out to those around her, befriends the friendless and even begins a prayer meeting in her school. When she is diagnosed with cancer, she doesn't allow her failing health to stop her from reaching out. This is a must see, and definitely something teenagers can relate to.

Come What May is a movie that makes me smile just thinking about it, even if it is a homeschool production. When Caleb Hogan wants to transfer to Patrick Henry College, his ability to continue his education there rests in whether or not he wins the Moot Court Championship. The case is abortion-related and he has to come to an agreement with his partner Rachel on how to make the argument. Will he choose to do what's right and risk having to leave PHC, or succumb to the pressure of the more popular argument? It's a movie that deals with many things, including guy-girl relationships, and is definitely worth seeing.

Faith Like Potatoes is the biographical film of Angus Buchan, a South African farmer and evangelist. After coming to know Christ, he takes giant leaps of faith and sees God do some incredible miracles. The movie was well done and accurate, but if you prefer reading, the book is fantastic too.

Gifted Hands is another biographical film about Dr. Ben Carson, an American neurosurgeon. It follows Ben's life, starting as a child in school as he struggled to pass his classes and deal with racism in a white community, and how, through the inspiration and encouragement of his mother he moved on to study at Yale University and become an accomplished surgeon. He was the first doctor to successfully separate conjoined twins who were attached at the head. He's a member of the Seventh-Day Adventist church and has also authored several books.

Amazing Grace is also a movie I have watched several times. And running with the biographical theme, this one is about William Wilberforce, as well as a little about John Newton. It follows Wilberforce's journey to abolish the British slave trade and the many challenges he faced along the way. It's an inspirational movie that you can't watch without wanting to do something about slavery today, which to many people's shock, is still happening in larger numbers than in Wilberforce's time.

Now, since I'm always short on ideas, what would you like to see me blog about?

From My Bookshelf

2010-06-27T18:48:00.003-04:00

I like reading. That's good, seeing as I work in a bookstore. Believe it or not, I have three lists of books I want to read, which I'm constantly adding to, so I'm not even making a dent. It'll probably take me a couple years to read everything I have on my lists, the way things stand now. Even though it'll probably never happen, I'm giving it a go anyway.

If you look at the right side of my blog, you will see a list of some of the great books I've read and I'm constantly adding to it. So, if you need ideas, there's some there, and if you have a question about one or need the author's name, just drop a comment. But for now, just for fun, I'm going to tell you a bit about what I have been reading recently and some of my favourites.

This past month, I read The Scottish Chiefs by Jane Porter. I first heard about the book from Eric Ludy when I learned about Ellerslie (a school I really hope to go to someday), and I although it was a little outside of my regular reading, I really enjoyed it. It tells the story of Sir William Wallace, a man of honour who fights for the freedom of his country, Scotland, and refuses to compromise his convictions. Having been written 200 years ago, it was a little difficult to get into at first, but once you get used to the older English, I dove right into the story. This is a great book of character for men and women alike.

I also read my first two books by Frank. E. Peretti. First, The Wounded Spirit is a combination of biography and Christian living and tells of the damaging effects of bullying. The second was Tilly, which is a short novel that tells the story of a woman dealing with grief over a past abortion and her experience of healing, forgiveness, and a love for her daughter. I saw the short film awhile ago and I was impressed with the accuracy between the two.

Now, as for my list, I would recommend anything by Eric and Leslie Ludy, although I haven't read all of their stuff yet. That would include Authentic Beauty, Set-Apart Femininity, The Lost Art of True Beauty, When Dreams Come True, When God Writes Your Life Story, The Bravehearted Gospel, and Wrestling Prayer. I'm also highly in favour of Do Hard Things and Start Here by Alex and Brett Harris. Unfashionable by Tullian Tchividjian is a great read that tells about the dangers of the modern church's ideas of being culturally relevant. It's a refreshing reminder that we as Christians are called to be different and not blend in with the world. Real Christianity by William Wilberforce is also a must read.

Now, in terms of fiction, I have a bit of an interesting taste. I think one of my favourite fiction books was The Binding of the Blade series by L.B. Graham. It's a mixture of fantasy and allegory that takes you from Satan's rebellion and the fall of man to the redemption of man. Laced throughout are many lessons on things you can apply to your own life, which I really appreciated. I've also enjoyed The Seventh World Trilogy by Rachel Starr Thomson and I'm looking forward to her third book in the trilogy coming out later on this year. In His Steps is another novel that has lots of substance to apply to your own Christian life.

I'm going to have to stop soon or else this will get way too long. I don't read a whole lot of biographies, but if I were to name one right now, I would say Faith Like Potatoes by Anges Buchan.

In the near future, I'm planning on re-reading a few of my favourite books and then embarking on No Compromise, the biography of Keith Green. That is, if I don't get sidetracked.

I'm almost thinking I'll have to do a DVD list in the near future. I don't watch a lot of movies and I know it can be difficult to find good solid Christian films, but I do still have some favourites that I can easily watch more than once.

God bless your week and happy reading!

Circle of Influence

2010-06-19T11:50:00.006-04:00

This past week, I was reminded again of this little circle I'm in possession of called influence. The scary thing is, that circle is bigger than I think. People are watching me. Uh-oh. That shouldn't surprise me since I watch other people all the time, but it does. All of a sudden one day you discover somebody is paying attention to your life and you have to take a step back.

It's a trend I've noticed coming up quite a bit. People will say something about me and I have no idea they took notice of such things. To be quite honest, there have been times where I have received compliments and said to myself, "If only it were that true."

I've realized how important it is that what people see in our lives is true, that our walk matches our talk. It's easy to say things that sound oh, so good, but at the same time, it's a far cry from the reality of your life. In that way, we are actually deceiving other people.

I want my readers to know that often the things I blog about are things I'm just beginning to learn. I share a lot of things that God is working out in my life, but some will take a long time to get where they ought to be. This is why it is important that we are understanding of other believers when they say or do something that doesn't quite match up. We're all being shaped into the image of Christ and it's something that doesn't happen overnight. If we were only to share about things after they were perfected in our lives, we would always be silent.

It's good to be often reminded of this. We have an influence on the people around us, consciously or unconsciously, and it's often bigger than we think. As I've been thinking about this though, I think I may have caught a small glimpse of what God wants to do in and through my life. He wants to do a lot more with our lives than we often think. Let Him use you for His wonderful purposes and use the influence He has given you for His glory.

2 Corinthians 3:2
"Ye are our epistle written in our hearts, known and read of all men:"

Dear Singleness

2010-06-10T15:37:00.007-04:00

Dear Singleness,

We have known each other for a really long time, about eighteen and a half years to be precise, and we have spent a lot of time together to say the least. You have always been there and stuck by me even when I wished I could get rid of you. If anybody claims to have never known a faithful friend, they sure haven't met you yet!

I have been thinking about you lately and the many years we've had together. We've shared so many memories, many filled with laughter, some with tears. We have spent time with family and friends, pushed through the dreary years of school and jumped into the real world of responsibility. We've grown up together, and now as I'm embarking on the journey of adulthood, whadda ya know, you're still with me.

You were there by my side as I sought the Lord and now continue to learn to love Him more. As I have grown spiritually and have now become a young woman, you were the one who always reminded me of my need to make Christ my first and only love and to seek my fulfillment in Him. You have done your job well.

As I grow older, I realize that our time together may be drawing to a close. Within a few years, it may be necessary for us to part and a new friend will take your place. I now it sounds like betrayal and abandonment, but it's not. You were created for such a time, and it is you who will make it all the more beautiful. I know I haven't always loved you the way I should have, and for that I am sorry, but I want you to know how much I appreciate you and all that you have taught me. God has used you to shape me into who I am and I know He will continue to do so until the day we say Good-bye.

In the meantime, Singleness, let's make the most of the remaining time we have. Let's love and serve the Lord together, pouring ourselves out for Him. The coming years will go by fast enough, so we must treasure every moment. Thank you for all you have ever been.

With all my love,
Margaret

The Next Level: Part 2

2010-06-06T13:52:00.005-04:00

Note: Read The Next Level: Part 1 first if you haven't already done so.

On Level Three, the people pride themselves in having a broader vision for the company. The General Manager explains their devotion to the "real CEO" (not the Director), a man they have never met, but know only through the "CEO's consultant." They are required to do many things to show their service and devotion to this "CEO", of which I will not go into details but just say that it sounds a lot like Islamic practices.

Each operation within the level has a different viewpoint concerning the company and each makes decisions based on that viewpoint. As the various managers explained their viewpoints to Logan, I continued to notice the trend of other religions being described. Various things they mentioned pointed to false ideas of becoming equal with God, universal harmony, nirvana, meditation, ultimate reality, karma, reincarnation, the four truths and how to eliminate suffering.

One of Logan's friends, Kyle from Level One, makes an interesting comment: "If employees lose touch with top management, I guess all sorts of conjecture starts floating around. And then people believe it and start organizing their work lives according to it." The same thing happens when we lose touch with God, if you will. We become susceptible to false teachings and ways of thinking. Not only that, but when people try by their own efforts to get to God, or reach some other state of bliss, they don't actually ever get anywhere and they never know if the things they have done are enough.

At this point, Logan has noticed the same problems on all of the first three levels: "None of them are taking directions from the top, all of them are doing their own thing, and none of them are actually contributing to the goals of the company."
Level Four on the other hand is a little more impressive at first sight, especially since they pride themselves in personally knowing the Director and Shareholder and always taking directions from them. On his tour, Logan is struck by the nice, upscale furniture and cafes that make the place more than comfortable. He also sees a "Manual review" in session, which the General Manager explains as follows: "We have a Manual written by the Director's very first direct reports. It governs everything we do, really. I don't mean the details--just the broad outlines. It sets our vision and reminds us of the heart of the Director and the Shareholder. We encourage employees to spend a lot of time getting to know it." Logan is also shown a vast auditorium for various large employee events, sessions and rallies complete with entertainment. Yep, sounds like a comfortable modern American church to me!

So there's always lots of hype and excitement on Level Four, and of course, they want to get as people as they can from the lower levels to come up to theirs. When Logan invites Kyle to come up to Level Four, he's actually turned off and can't help but notice the large amount of continuous "rededication" among employees. Although the focus is always on the Shareholder, sessions are usually based on success, self-improvement, and what the Director or Shareholder can do for you. Even with all this constant training and endless sessions, one employee has to admit that it isn't working for him and he isn't making any progress. Level Four just isn't what he expected.

Soon Logan begins to see past all the excitement, rallies, pep talks, happy faces and stuff. He notices that even with all this, the work they do is really no different from that on other levels. They claim to be happy, but they're really not. Everybody says and does all the right stuff, but what all boils down to is just a fake show.

When Logan discusses these things with the Director, he says something that I believe sums up what the problem is among so many believers today. "They want to work for the Shareholder, but by and large, work still revolves around them--what they want to do, what their goals are, whether they are getting what they want. . . . As long as they're the center, they're fooling themselves. The Shareholder's agenda is not really their own."
When Logan is given the option of working on Level Five, he makes some observations that don't really make sense to him. Each of the employees have jobs throughout the company, some of them which would be considered pretty menial tasks, others simply unusual. And yet, each one is happy in what they do. Their focus is to be a servant and to reflect the Shareholder in their work. You could say that they're the example of true Christianity in this book.

Logan can't exactly understand the concept of how Level Five operates until he meets with the Shareholder himself. The Shareholder explains it well. "In this company if you hold on to what you want for yourself, it produces loss. But if you give yourself up for the sake of the company--for myself and my son--then it produces huge profits. And you personally gain everything."

This book covered so much that it was hard to condense. It shows you what happens when people are self-focused, when they try to be good by their own efforts and rules, the problem with false teachings and religions, and the danger of a self-focused version of Christianity. It answers many tough questions and brings out some excellent points about life. I appreciate authors who write fiction like this that challenge the way we live as Christians.

Until next time, God bless!

The Next Level: Part 1

2010-06-05T19:09:00.007-04:00

When I started reading The Next Level: A Parable About Finding Your Place in Life by David Gregory, I was immediately intrigued and knew it would make a great blog post. I know this book could be interpreted in different ways, but I want to give you my take on it, although I know I won't be covering everything that could be covered. I decided to work through the whole book, so if it's something you want to read, you may want to do so before reading this. Also, due to the length I have divided it into two parts, the second of which I will be posting in a few days.

The Next Level tells the story of Logan Bell, who goes to apply for a job at Universal Systems Inc., a large prominent software company. He's surprised when the receptionist immediately sends him up to see the Director, the CEO of the company. On his way up, he takes notice of the size of the building, which consists of five levels. Once he reaches the Director's desk, he's given an informal interview and hired on the spot as an organizational development analyst (OD).

Logan's job is quite simple. He is required to begin working on the first level of the building and analyze what the major problem is on that level. Once he has completed this assignment, he will be moved up to the next level, and if he manages to complete the first four levels, he will have the option of joining the Director himself on the fifth floor.

On the first level Logan meets some interesting people to say the least. After several weeks of meetings and observations, he notes that employees are not working together towards common goals and they lack creativity. On one occasion, he goes around to each employee on the floor to find out what they are doing at that given moment. He discovers that each individual is doing something personal and are not actually doing anything work-related. They're all busy accomplishing nothing.

When Logan goes up to see the Director, he asks him why the owner just lets everyone go on doing their own thing when it results in great loss for the company. He explains that the Shareholder (the owner of the company, who you later discover to be the Director's father) chooses to give each individual the freedom to decide whether or not to work towards the goals and profit of the company. Logan is saddened by the lack of accomplishment and happiness among the people of Level One, to which the Director responds, "That's what happens when we become self-focused, isn't it? Life loses it's meaning."

When Logan reaches Level Two, it doesn't take him long to diagnose the problem when he's handed a Code of Conduct that might as well have been an encyclopaedia. On this level, the main focus is integrity and there are very specific rules and regulations about everything, including the kind and number of pieces of candy allowed and the brand of furniture polish permitted. Some of the specifications are rather amusing. All violations are carefully tracked and disciplinary measures are taken. Logan observes that in this level's efforts to be good, they aren't actually doing any good, with the exception of one department. He notices that they're so caught up in their rules and being people of integrity that they don't actually get anything done to benefit the company. In all reality, they're missing the whole point.

By the time Logan reaches Level Three, I started noticing an interesting trend. Each employee had the option of moving to a different level at any time, but nobody chose to. They each believed that their level's way of doing things was the best and they were quick to point out what was wrong with the methods of other levels. Sounds a lot like us Christians sometimes, doesn't it? We always believe that our way of doing things or set of beliefs is right and we're quick to criticize everybody else. And you know, sometimes we may be right but we don't always need to say so.

This seems to be a suitable break-point to somewhat evenly divide my two sections and to make things flow properly, although the next portion is longer. Be sure to watch for Part 2 within the next few days to find out what Logan discovers on the next few levels. They're the most intriguing ones. God bless!

Emptied to be Filled

2010-06-01T10:05:00.004-04:00

It was late one cold, dark night when a young woman came before the Lord. Her feet felt heavy as she approached His majestic throne. At first, she couldn't find the words to say, nor could she bring herself to look up into His face. But she felt His loving gaze upon her and He quietly prompted her to speak her heart. She struggled but for a moment before the floodgates of her heart had opened.

“How long, oh Lord, how long?” she pleaded. “When will I ever come out of this darkness, this place of restlessness? I thought you were a God of joy and peace?”

“I am, child, I am,” He gently replied.

“Then why can’t I feel it? God, my life is a mess and I just don’t know what to do anymore. Why won’t you help me?”

“I will help you, if you are willing to be helped,” He said.

“What do You mean, if I’m willing to be helped? Is that not what I asked You for?”

“Are you willing to let go and surrender everything I ask you to? Are you willing to submit to Me and be obedient, no matter what the cost? Are you ready to let me cleanse your life and make you like Myself? It will not be easy.”

What could He possibly ask her to do, she wondered? Was she not already living for Him? She wavered momentarily and then desperately said, “I think so. I will do anything; just help me out of this place!”

At once He began to show her things in her life that she had done to hurt Him and others. She saw acts of sin and selfishness, words spoken that cut and hurt. She saw chains of bondage called Fear, Guilt, Shame, Regret, and Insecurity. She remembered all the times God asked her to do something and said no out of fear of what may happen. She wondered that although she had repented of all these things and received His forgiveness, that she still felt guilt and shame? Where was the healing God always promised? Where was the freedom, joy and peace?

Knowing her thoughts, He looked at her and said, “Until you let go and submit and obey whatever I command you, you cannot know the fullness of these things, my freedom, joy and peace.”

She shook her head violently. “No,” she reasoned, “I can’t. Think of what will happen to me if I obey? I mean, I know I can trust You, but what about my reputation? What if what I do will not be accepted and I will only be hated and put to more shame? I can’t do it God. I can’t.”

“Oh, my child,” He said sadly, “unless you surrender your entire life, with all of your plans, hopes, dreams, your fears, guilt, shame, insecurities, unless you make My will your will, I cannot truly help you. I need your whole life, with nothing held back. Then I can make something beautiful out of it.”

“Beautiful?” The word almost sounded strange and foreign to her ears. “How can my life possibly be beautiful?”

“What you see is only a portion of the bigger picture. I’m painting a beautiful masterpiece with your life, but you will not see it clearly until I’m finished. It will take me many years yet to finish, but I promise you it will be beautiful.”

By now tears were streaming down her cheeks. “No. It’s way too painful. I can’t handle it. It hurts too much.”

He looked at her with tears in His eyes. “It hurt me too.” With that, He showed her His nail-pierced hands and pointed to the cross where He had hung, stripped and beaten, where blood had flowed from His wounds and crowds mocked and ridiculed Him to pay the price for her sin. The very Son of God, Creator of the universe, cared enough for her, a poor, wretched sinner to endure such agony and death. How could she do anything but submit to Him?

Slowly, she felt her heart soften as she let go of all the things that had enslaved her for so many years. She watched it all fall down at His feet. All of her hopes, dreams, plans, and deepest desires. All of her joys, tears, fears, guilt, shame. Several times she came across something that she felt she could not let go. “Anything but this,” she would say. It was too much. She looked up at His sad, compassionate eyes. “Everything?” she choked.

“Yes. Everything.”

He watched as slowly every last thing in her life slipped through my fingers. Then, she looked around her and despair seemingly flooded her soul. Again she looked up at her Lord as tears once again made their way down her cheeks and dropped to the ground. “It’s all gone. Every last piece of my life is gone. I’ve given it all to You. There’s nothing left.”

Slowly a smile spread across His face. “Oh, but you’re wrong, my child. Now that you’re empty, you are ready to experience the fullness of Myself, the fullness of joy and peace that I give and no one can take away. Now that you are empty and broken, you are ready to be made complete. You are ready to experience My best plans for you and a life so fresh and exciting beyond anything you could ever have imagined. Yes, hard times will still come, but you will experience my nearness like never before. Don’t you see it now, my child? You were emptied so you could finally be filled.”

She smiled, and in her heart, she knew that it was enough.

Remembering God's Faithfulness

2010-05-27T14:39:00.005-04:00

Do you ever think about God's faithfulness and just weep? Have you ever contemplated His goodness and found tears coming to your eyes? Have you ever taken the time to recount the many things He has done in your life and been filled with an inexpressible joy? I have.

I think as Christians, we often fail to remember these things. We get so caught up in the here-and-now and worries about the present and the future that we fail to recognize God's unending faithfulness. I also think God realized this was going to happen right from the beginning or He would not have told His people so many times to remember.

Something I've noticed recently as I've been reading through the first few books of the Old Testament is that God often commands the people to remember or to set something aside as an object of remembrance. In Exodus 13 when God institutes the Passover, He commands them to remember:

"And Moses said unto the people, Remember this day, in which ye came out of Egypt, out of the house of bondage; for by strength of hand the LORD brought you out from this place: there shall no leavened bread be eaten." --Exodus 13:3

In Exodus 20, He commands the people of Israel to remember the Sabbath and proceeds to tell them why it is holy.

I've noticed how prone the Israelites were to forget God's faithfulness. When they were brought out of the land of Egypt, they greatly rejoiced, but as soon as difficulties arose, they forgot and began complaining. Also in Numbers 11, the people complain after having tired of the manna that they ate day after day in the wilderness, and longed for Egypt where they had fish, cucumbers, melons, onions, leeks and garlic. It seems they totally forgot about God's amazing deliverance!

It is so important that we as Christians never cease to remember God's faithfulness. It's good for us not just to remember the death, burial and resurrection of Christ that brought us salvation, although that is very important, but to remember the various works He has done for us over the years. I encourage you to take the time to recount the many ways in which God has worked in your life.

I'm amazed at the things I have seen God has done in my life over the past several years. He has shown Himself strong in directing me in areas of schooling and work. I can look back and see circumstances which God has used to shape and mold me more into His image and how He has continued to change me. He has brought me through many valleys and trials and I'm so thankful for His unending faithfulness.

Give this a try and I assure you will be blessed!

Lamentations 3:22-23
"It is of the LORD's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassion's fail not.
They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness."

Why Settle for Less?

2010-05-22T12:13:00.005-04:00

Have you ever wondered why people so often settle for mediocrity? Do you ever wonder why people settle for so much less than they could have? Why do people settle for compromise? If you take some time to think about it, it's almost kind of strange. But the one conclusion I have come to on the matter is that some people are not ready for the necessary sacrifice of obtaining more.

If you look at the world around us, there's no doubt about it that standards continue to drop. Compromise and settling simply for what is average, or even less than average, is no longer very difficult. On the contrary, it's actually expected, especially of teenagers. But why would you settle for what is good when you can have that which is great? Why would you settle for average when you can strive for excellence? The two areas that I want to look at specifically in this post is that of marriage and our spiritual lives.

Nowadays, it's no surprise to hear of marriages crumbling and men and women who have divorced and remarried several times. It's considered "normal" for teenagers to go from one dating fling to the next, giving their emotions and bodies away to anyone without much of a second thought. And sadly, it's far too common in Christian circles as well. And yet, God wants us to experience so much more, and not just for a fleeting moment, but for a lifetime.

I've had people suggest to me that I'm too picky about the kind of man I want to marry someday, and that my expectations are too high. However, I know that when I get married, I will be committing "till death do us part." Therefore, I want to marry someone who I know I will be able to love, honour, respect, trust and submit to. At the same time, I also want to be sure that he will love me as Christ loves the church and gave Himself up for it. I want to have confidence that he will be a godly leader of our home and that he will be a good father to our children. He must be a man of godly character, integrity, a man who has a love for the Word of God and prayer. Jesus Christ must be at the core of his life and he must love Him above anything else.

I know this may sound very bold, but I don't believe that's too much to ask for. In fact, I believe that it's exactly what God wants for me and more. And if there's one thing I know for sure, it's that I will never be deserving of the wonderful man He will bring into my life. I know I have a long way to go before I will be ready to be a godly wife, but it's a work that God is doing within me. There are not many men who possess the qualities that I have described above, but I know they're out there, and by God's enabling grace, I intend to hold out for one. Why would I settle for less?

Now, in the area of our spiritual lives, there are also very few who strive to live above the mediocrity of modern North American Christianity. Most lives do not display the power of the Spirit and victory, but utter defeat. For all too many, reading the Bible is a drag, they have no desire to pray and they have no victory over sin and they accept that this is all there is. The think the power read about in Acts and the early church no longer exists. They read biographies of men and women of the past and say "That just doesn't happen anymore." And above all they're afraid that if they try and reach for something more, they will be outcasts. After all, they don't want to be called radical or extreme and certainly don't want to leave a legalistic or "holier-than-thou" impression. They're not willing to sacrifice the comfort of their present lives and endure any pain that may be necessary in living out Biblical Christianity.

The interesting thing is that such mediocrity is nothing new. I was struck by this while reading through Philippians this morning. Paul had a very difficult time finding men who were wholly devoted to God, men whom he could count on to support him in his work. Timothy, however, was a man he could count on and was confident of his genuine love for the church. In Philippians 2:20,21, he says:
"For I have no man likeminded, who will naturally care for your state.
For all seek their own, not the things which are Jesus Christ's."

And it's not only Paul who faced this challenge. Missionaries of the past have faced the same problem, that is, the inability to find men and women who are wholly devoted to Jesus Christ and the work of God. All too many are more concerned about earthly pleasures. So we see that yes, these men and women are few, but the truth is, each one of us can be one of the few.

I also never get the impression that Paul settled down where he was at. He always pressed on "toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus." He didn't settle and he never gave up. And neither should we.

Philippians 4:8
"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things."

I could say so much more, but I will leave it at that. But remember, if God has promised you treasure, will you dig until you find it, no matter how long it takes?

Clinging to Christ

2010-05-10T15:08:00.004-04:00

When life proves to be more difficult and you feel the pains of God's pruning and chastising in your life, it's easy to grow weary and discouraged. God's cleansing and purifying work is not easy, but we know that we will be stronger for it in the end. In the past few weeks, I've had to really cling to certain things to get me through. I've had to to remember who God is and what Jesus has done for me, remember who I am in Christ, and I have to hold to His promises.

When we realize who God is and what Jesus has done for us, it makes anything He asks us to do appear a little smaller. Just think that the Creator of the entire universe loves and cares about you. Remember that the very Son of God left His throne, lived a pure, sinless life and died a cruel death for you. If you think what you're going through hurts, remember what He did for you. Look to the cross where He hung stripped, beaten, mocked, ridiculed and how the blood flowed from His wounds. All of this He endured for you. We have been purchased by a very great price.

When we go through difficult times, Satan loves to come in our point of weakness and remind us of all the filth and slime we have behind us. He loves to tell us how wretched and sinful we are and top it off with a load of guilt and shame. And so often we believe it, because apart from Christ, it's true. But in Christ, we see a very different picture. In Christ, I am:

accepted, forgiven and blameless
unconditionally loved
held safe in His arms
we are pure, sanctified and perfected

Isaiah 43 is also a huge encouragement to me and it shows me who God is, and although God is speaking of Israel, to me is shows me who I am because of Him. I know I've gone over this same thing before, but a review certainly doesn't hurt:

God has created and redeemed me, called me by name and I am His (v.1)
He is with me through water and fire (v.2)
I am precious and honoured in His eyes and He loves me (v.4)
I am created for God's glory (v.7)
I am His witness and chosen servant (v.10)
God is the LORD, Redeemer, Holy One of Israel, Creator of Israel, and King
"Remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert." (v.18,19, ESV)
God blots out my sins for His own sake and He will not remember them (v.25)

There are many more verses in scripture that tell us who we are in Christ and I encourage you to search them out. And while you're doing that, search out His promises. I take great comfort in the fact that God will never leave me or forsake me, that I am His bride and He is coming back for me and that one day He will wipe away all tears. In times of trouble, I love to turn to the Psalms because it often shows me all of those things I mentioned above.

I have by no means gone into exhaustive lists here. I have merely scratched the surface, but I would love your feedback. Who are you in Christ? What promises do you cling to in difficult times? And I would also love to know who all my readers are, so please do come out of hiding.

God bless!

The Set-Apart Life

2010-04-27T15:04:00.006-04:00

Once again, I have read an inspiring Ludy book and want to write about it. In fact, you may be reading many of these Ludy posts in the near future, as I'm currently working my way through many of their books. This past week, I completed Authentic Beauty: The Shaping of a Set-Apart Young Woman by Leslie Ludy.

One of Eric and Leslie's main themes is living a set-apart life. That is, a life primarily set-apart for God, and also for your future spouse. They offer no form of casual, comfortable, or compromising Christianity because truly the Christian life has much more substance than that. What they offer is far from easy, but if you search Scripture, you will see that it is nothing short of what Christ Himself put forth.

What does it mean to live a life that is set-apart? I don't think there's a short, one sentence answer for this question, and to be quite honest, I'm not sure exactly how to accurately define it. It's a life all about truly knowing your Prince, not just knowing about Him. It's about cultivating a deep and intimate relationship with the Lover of your soul. It's not about fitting Jesus into your life, but building your entire life around Him, where He is at the very core of every aspect of your life. It's about creating an inner sanctuary for Him and protecting it. It's about a lifestyle that is lily white.

Creating that inner sanctuary, that place for intimacy with your Prince, can be a painful cleansing process. It means taking out a lot of trash and removing anything and everything that hinders that deep relationship with God. And sometimes, you may find it has to be done on a regular basis. All sinful habits and activities have to go. Anything that demands our time, love and attention above God and takes our focus off of Christ must be rooted out. This is part of what it means to live a life set-apart for God.

Yes, cultivating a more intimate relationship with our Prince can be difficult and it takes time (I'm speaking from experience), but it is so worth it. Take adequate time on a daily basis to spend in the Word and in prayer. Take delight in Him by maintaining a quiet heart and a spirit of worship, communing with God even while accomplishing your everyday tasks. You don't have to limit your relationship with God to your quiet time in the morning.

This life is also about being set apart for your future husband. As young women, it is so easy to be consumed with being noticed by the opposite sex and it's easy to strive for that attention we long for. But God has a much greater plan for our lives, and if we give Him the pen, He will write a love story far beyond what we could ever dream.

Part of His amazing plan for our lives is keeping ourselves for our future spouse and that means so much more than the simple "save-sex-for-marriage" mentality that many Christians put forth. It means keeping our hearts, minds, emotions, and body for the man you marry. It means living a life that honours him, even if you haven't even met him yet. And yes, this is often very hard to do, but it will save us a lot of pain and heartache and make it so much more beautiful in the end.

For me, one of the most difficult aspects of this is maintaining pure thoughts. It's so easy to allow ourselves to entertain fantasies that may seem perfectly harmless, especially since nobody has to know that they're there. (I'm also almost certain that if there was one aspect of your life that you were most afraid of being exposed, it would be your thought life.) It's easy to leave unchecked, but it is something we must strive to keep pure. When temptations or impure thoughts come to mind, we must choose to shut them out immediately. Even in this, we can do a lot to honour our future spouses.

Even if you haven't kept yourself pure, or maybe you have suffered from sexual abuse, know that God is forgiving and can bring healing to your life. He can take your broken life, your shattered heart and create something beautiful out of it. He can give you a fresh, lily white start and you too can experience a beautiful God-written love story.

If you haven't read Authentic Beauty, I would strongly encourage you to do so. I would however, advise caution with younger girls (as Leslie also does in her introduction) because of a lot of mature content and details. I have the updated and expanded edition, which is really great because it includes a "Studying Manhood" portion by Eric where he talks about the making of Warrior Poets and it is fantastic! I would also recommend Leslie's book Set-Apart Femininity, which I have previously read.

My desire is that you too would be challenged to be a set-apart young woman and live for the glory of the Lord.

Cultivating Your Prayer Life

2010-04-19T14:26:00.003-04:00

So I'm finally here to put up a real post, if you can call it that. My life has been a little bittersweet lately, filled with many joys, but it has also been laced with sorrows and difficulties. But even so, I can say it has certainly been strengthening my prayer life. I'm going to attempt to put some of my recent thoughts into something coherent.

Strengthening your prayer life is one of those things that just isn't easy. But then again a lot of things really worth having aren't easy to get. Sometimes the best things in life require the most fighting and prayer is one of them. It often takes time and a lot of effort; there is no easy formula to a stronger prayer life. I discovered this when I read Eric and Leslie Ludy's book Wrestling Prayer: A Passionate Communion with God. There is no easy 5 step formula. It takes work but it's something worth fighting for.

There are times in life when there are things on my heart that I can't bring to anybody else. There are griefs and burdens that I can't handle on my own and I can only turn to God in prayer. He knows and even when words cannot express what I'm feeling, He's listening. In the past, whenever difficulty would come my way, I would first turn to a friend. In trials, I always wanted to confide in my friends often before I even went before God. Now I don't do that easily anymore, but have rather pleaded with God in prayer and have found Him to be faithful all the time. No matter what happens, I can trust Him and be completely honest with Him.

As I recently read through the Gospels, one of the things I noticed was how Jesus went up to the mountain to pray. It's interesting to see that Jesus Christ, the Son of God, spent so much time in prayer. Often at the end of a long day serving and teaching others, He would go up to the mountain to pray. Why the mountain? Was it simply because there was nowhere else to go? Was that the only place where people would leave Him alone? (If you have any thoughts on this, please share them with me.) Whatever the case was, He spent an incredible amount of time communing with the Father and I have a feeling there were many nights where He got little to no sleep. Even the last night of His life before He was crucified He spent agonizing in prayer.

Another aspect of prayer that I have been learning is boldness. Hebrews 4:16 tells us to "come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need." Philippians 4:6 says "in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God." The scary part though about exercising boldness is that God answers and sometimes I'm not ready when He does.

Prayer is also often difficult because sometimes when God answers it hurts. This is especially true if you pray for God's cleansing in your life. His goal is to make us more like Christ and the purification process can often get very painful.

But overall, I have come to discover that prayer and a passionate communion with God is something worth fighting for. What compels a man to do anything to win the heart of and be with the woman he loves? What compels a man to sell everything he has to purchase one pearl of great price? What compelled Christ to come and suffer and die for mankind? Because in the end, each man knows that the price is more than worth it.

God bless!